Awkward and Proud: Rebecca Fellenbaum Of Rebecca Fellenbaum Coaching On How Embracing Your True Self Can Be Your Social Superpower
An interview with Dr. Bharat Sangani
Get to know yourself. Take an inventory of your values, wants, and desires. When I realized I didn’t have to stay busy to prove my worth, I embraced hobbies like puzzles and diamond art that bring me joy and allow me quiet time.
In a world that often pressures us to fit in, embracing quirks and authenticity can become a unique advantage. Leaning into what makes you different, even if it feels awkward, can foster genuine connections and unlock personal empowerment. In this series, we would like to explore how embracing one’s true self can transform social interactions and become a powerful tool for building meaningful relationships. As a part of this series, we had the pleasure of interviewing Rebecca Fellenbaum.
Rebecca Fellenbaum is a certified somatic life coach, writer, and Cleveland-based mom. She helps moms who have made it on the outside feel great about themselves on the inside so they can find joy in their lives, kids, and families. Get her free guide: Slowing Down: 9 Steps to Live With Intention to start meaning it when you say you’re doing fine. Find her and connect at rebeccafellenbaum.com.
Thank you so much for your time! I know that you are a very busy person. Our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you tell us a bit about your ‘backstory’ and how you got started?
It started with a small internal voice: You can help others on their journeys, it said. That day, I inquired about The Adult Chair® coaching certification. The next intake started with a retreat in six weeks. The stars aligned, and here I am, a Certified Adult Chair® Coach.
Today, as a life coach, I help fellow moms who feel lost, guiding them to love themselves, take ownership of their lives, and experience deeper connections. But finding my purpose was not a linear journey. For most of my life, I was living on autopilot.
I had built a seemingly perfect life: a husband, two kids, a career, a dog, a nice house, close family, friends I cared about, a social life, and hobbies and interests. I was healthy, educated, well-traveled, and fulfilled many of my bucket list items. It was all there on paper. And I mostly enjoyed it. But beneath the surface, there were cracks in my relationships and within myself.
I remember in my 20s right around when my husband and I were getting married and he called me out for letting my anxiety and rage come out sideways over seemingly silly stuff. It took almost another 15 years, but when the challenges of parenting and the COVID lockdown collided, those cracks got too wide to step over.
Daily walks and listening to The Adult Chair podcast unlocked something deep within me. I slowed down enough to hear my heart’s whispers and my intuition. Over the past four years, I learned to embrace love and vulnerability while navigating the darker corners of my mind.
When the thought go for it resonated within me, I actively pursued a coaching certification. Taking action came naturally once I trusted my path. Now, I am falling in love with coaching every day and living my dream. The perfect life I build looks mostly the same from the outside, but inside, I am experiencing it in a completely new way.
None of us can achieve success without some help along the way. Is there a particular person that you are grateful for, who helped get you to where you are? Can you share a story?
My mom taught me the value of following your dreams. When I was in fifth grade she went back to school to earn her PhD. It was a huge commitment and it took her away from us kids at times as she commuted to school. I remember catching rides to and from sports practices and gaining more independence at that young age. When I was 13, my dad took my siblings and me to watch my mom defend her PhD thesis. It left a lasting impression and inspired me to pivot my career in my 40s to pursue my purpose.
You are a successful leader. Which three character traits do you think were most instrumental to your success? Can you please share a story or example for each?
- Curiosity: The patience and desire to understand myself and others drive me every day.
- Slowing down to my intuition: Slowing down allowed me to hear my soul’s whispers.
- Taking the next right step: Focusing on the next right action makes big changes feel manageable.
Ok, fantastic. Let’s now turn to the crux of our interview. Can you recall a moment when embracing your awkwardness led to a meaningful personal or professional breakthrough? What shifted for you in that experience?
The first time I acted like my true, embodied self in a social situation was awkward yet transformative. I’ve always loved connecting one-on-one but felt out of place in group settings. This year, I made a conscious effort to say yes to gatherings and remain present.
When I went to a large party this summer, I focused on grounding myself — feeling my feet on the floor, engaging my senses, and avoiding alcohol to stay fully present. Instead of overthinking conversations afterward, I chose positive thoughts about the experience. This practice has helped me connect with others and remain authentic, even in situations that once felt uncomfortable.
Many people feel pressure to ‘fit in’ socially. What advice do you have for someone struggling to be their authentic self in a world that often rewards conformity?
Here are some things I do to help me stay embodied:
- Stay grounded: Practice noticing your breath or your feet on the ground.
- Engage your senses: Slowly take in your surroundings to stay present.
- Choose your thoughts: Remind yourself that the people around you want connection, not perfection.
How do you think embracing your quirks and imperfections can enhance connections with others, especially in professional or high-pressure settings?
It is only when we are authentic that we can authentically connect with others. Our nervous systems are constantly scanning for safety. When I show up embodied and as myself, my quirks and imperfections come along with me. However, I am heart-centered, grounded, and calm. Without consciously noticing it, this is more attractive to the people around me. Their nervous systems are more likely to find safety and connection with mine, quirks and all!
What role does vulnerability play in transforming awkwardness into a superpower? Can you share a time when showing vulnerability opened doors or strengthened relationships?
The more I healed my egoic parts that worked to protect me from being vulnerable and seen, the more confident I became in myself. Confidence can break down our instinct to maintain a shield around our vulnerability. As a more confident person, I embraced my awkwardness because I no longer felt the need to prove myself to others. Viewing us all as beautiful souls having a human experience, it becomes easier to connect with other people. The walls of judgment and comparison fall away.
What are “5 Ways To Embrace Your True Self”?
1 . Get to know yourself
Take an inventory of your values, wants, and desires. When I realized I didn’t have to stay busy to prove my worth, I embraced hobbies like puzzles and diamond art that bring me joy and allow me quiet time.
2 . Feel your emotions
Emotions are temporary but they need to be processed. Allow yourself to sit in the discomfort of your feelings knowing they will metabolize through.
3 . Practice speaking your truth
Admit what you don’t know and ask questions. Share your opinions (kindly, of course). The more you remove the white lies and passive-aggressive comments, the more authentically you show up in the world. It’s amazing how once I started doing that, I felt more honestly connected with the people in my life.
4 . Choose your thoughts.
Your thoughts lead to your actions and ultimately to your beliefs. Reframing challenging thoughts can help you grow.
5 . Own your behavior
We all act in ways that don’t feel good. When you overreact, yell, get angry, or stomp out of the room, give yourself grace. Owning your actions leads to self-acceptance and shows others you’re human too.
Do you believe that celebrating awkwardness can inspire innovation and creativity? How has staying true to yourself influenced your approach to problem-solving or leadership?
Celebrating awkwardness invites innovation and creativity because you take off your masks of perfection and let down the egoic part of you that works so hard to fit in. When you embrace the fact that you’re probably pretty awkward at your core, you inspire others to let down their guards and that is the best form of leadership — modeling the behavior you want to see.
How can our readers further follow your work?
You can find me on my corner of the internet at rebeccafellenbaum.com, where you will find free resources and can sign up for a free coaching session. I am also a regular contributor on Medium and a sometimes poster on Instagram.
Thank you so much for sharing these important insights. We wish you continued success and good health!
About The Interviewer: Dr. Bharat Sangani is a cardiologist and entrepreneur with over 35 years of experience, practicing in Gulfport, Mississippi, and Dallas, Texas. Board-certified in Internal Medicine and Cardiology, he specializes in diagnosing, treating, and preventing cardiovascular diseases, including heart disease and hypertension. In 1999, Dr. Sangani founded Encore Enterprises, a national real estate investment firm. Under his leadership, the company has executed transactions exceeding $2 billion, with a portfolio spanning residential, retail, hotel, and office developments. Known for his emphasis on integrity and fairness, Dr. Sangani has built Encore into a major player in the commercial real estate sector. Blending his medical and business expertise, Dr. Sangani created the Life is a Business mentorship program. The initiative offers guidance on achieving balance in health, wealth, and relationships, helping participants align personal and professional goals. Now based in Dallas, Texas, Dr. Sangani continues to practice cardiology while leading Encore Enterprises and mentoring others. His career reflects a unique blend of medical expertise, entrepreneurial spirit, and dedication to helping others thrive.
Awkward and Proud: Rebecca Fellenbaum Of Rebecca Fellenbaum Coaching On How Embracing Your True… was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.