An Interview With Jake Frankel
Be Authentic: Share your true story and emotions. Authenticity resonates deeply with readers. When I first started writing my book, I hesitated to include the most painful parts of my story, fearing judgment and misunderstanding. However, I soon realized that authenticity was crucial. I vividly remember the day I decided to include the raw details of my experiences with childhood sexual abuse and domestic violence, it was a transformational experience for me as I had carried the shame all my life and it felt liberating to release the shame as this wasn’t mine to carry.
As part of my series about “How to write a book that sparks a movement” I had the pleasure of interviewing Anu Verma
Anu Verma is a trauma expert and the founder of Victim 2 Victor. A survivor of childhood sexual abuse and domestic violence, she works with people to help them heal their own trauma and empower them to find freedom from the pain which has been holding them back.
She is a certified complex trauma recovery coach and therapist and shares her own story of survival and healing in her acclaimed book, Victim 2 Victor and on her podcast of the same name. Anu, who lives in Coventry, has recently written a screenplay based on her book and is currently working with renowned filmmaker Sir Marco Robinson to turn it into a film called Silent Screams — a girl’s journey to reclaim her voice.
Thank you so much for joining us! Can you share the “backstory” of how you grew up?
Thank you for having me. I grew up in a traditional Indian family in Coventry, UK. I experienced childhood trauma from the age of three, which impacted the rest of my life.
In our culture, Indian women are often seen but not heard. This means that from a young age, I was conditioned to keep quiet about anything bad that happened to me. The societal expectations dictated that I should maintain silence, suppress my emotions, and uphold the family’s honour above all else. Speaking out about personal issues, especially those involving abuse, was considered taboo and could bring shame upon the family.
As a result, when bad things did happen to me, I felt an overwhelming pressure to remain silent. The abuse I endured was buried deep within me. I learned to suppress my emotions and internalise my pain, believing that expressing my suffering would only lead to more harm and disappointment. This conditioning had an impact on my mental health. I struggled with feelings of isolation, depression, and anxiety, unable to voice my trauma or seek help.
When you were younger, was there a book that you read that inspired you to take action or changed your life? Can you share a story?
The one book that I read when I was younger that changed my life was “Matilda” by Roald Dahl. I could relate to her being lonesome and burying herself in books. Like Matilda, I often felt isolated and misunderstood, finding solace and companionship in the world of literature. Matilda’s story of resilience and intelligence amidst a challenging family environment resonated deeply with me.
Her journey of self-discovery and empowerment inspired me to believe in my own strength and potential, even when the world around me felt hostile and unsupportive. Matilda’s courage to stand up for herself and others, despite the oppressive figures in her life, gave me hope and a sense of agency.
This book became a source of comfort and inspiration, reminding me that knowledge and imagination are powerful tools for overcoming adversity. It encouraged me to keep reading, learning, and dreaming, ultimately shaping my journey towards healing and advocacy.
What was the moment or series of events that made you decide to bring your message to the greater world? Can you share a story about that?
My journey toward healing and advocacy began when I realized that I could no longer carry the weight of my past in silence. I sought therapy, connected with other survivors, and gradually started to share my story. By speaking out, I reclaimed my power and began to heal the wounds that had been festering for so long.
The pivotal moment came when I realised that sharing my story could empower others to break free from their pain. After years of therapy and self-discovery, I felt a strong urge to write my book, “Victim 2 Victor.” Seeing how my personal journey resonated with people around me confirmed that my message needed to reach a broader audience.
Today, as a trauma expert and advocate for survivors of abuse, I use my experiences to help others who are going through similar struggles. I strive to create a safe space where survivors can share their stories, find support, and start their own healing journeys. My goal is to break the cycle of silence and empower others to speak out, knowing that their voices matter and that they deserve to be heard.
What impact did you hope to make when you wrote this book? Did the actual results align with your expectations? Can you explain?
I hoped to inspire survivors to start their healing process and to raise awareness about the long-term effects of trauma. The actual results surpassed my expectations. I received so much support and gratitude from readers who felt seen and understood.
It was heartening to see my book become a beacon of hope for many. Knowing that my story could provide strength and inspiration to those in similar situations made all the challenges I faced worthwhile. This feedback reinforced my belief in the importance of sharing our stories and advocating for change, as it highlighted the profound impact that connection and understanding can have on the healing process.
What moment let you know that your book had started a movement? Please share a story.
The moment I knew my book had started a movement was when I began receiving messages from readers worldwide, sharing their own stories of survival and healing. One particularly touching story came from a woman in my local town who I bumped into when I was out for lunch. She recognised me, came and thanked me and we hugged, and she explained how my book gave her the courage to leave a toxic relationship of 35 years and seek therapy. That was incredibly fulfilling and confirmed that my message was making a difference.
One particularly touching message I received on LinkedIn was from the brother of a survivor. His sister had been in a domestically abusive marriage, and after she managed to escape, she showed him my book. She explained how a charity that was helping her recommended my book, and when she read it, it transformed her and empowered her to leave the marriage. Her brother reached out to thank me for helping her, expressing his heartfelt gratitude.
What kinds of things did you hear right away from readers? What are the most frequent things you hear from readers about your book now? Are they the same? Different?
Initially, readers shared how my book helped them feel less alone in their experiences. Many expressed gratitude for the practical advice and coping strategies I included. They found comfort in knowing that someone else had gone through similar struggles and had come out the other side. This sense of connection and validation was incredibly meaningful to them, as it reassured them that their feelings were valid and their journeys toward healing were possible.
Now, I often hear from readers who have used my book as a resource in their own advocacy work, helping others to heal and find their voices. These readers share stories of how they’ve recommended my book to friends, family, and support groups. They use it to facilitate discussions, offer hope and provide concrete steps for dealing with trauma. Some have even started their own initiatives, inspired by the message of empowerment and resilience in my book.
The consistent theme is one of empowerment and hope. Whether they are at the beginning of their healing journey or further along, readers find strength in the stories and advice shared in my book. The evolution from personal healing to community advocacy among my readers is incredibly rewarding. It highlights the ripple effect of sharing our stories and the power of collective support and action.
What is the most moving or fulfilling experience you’ve had as a result of writing this book? Can you share a story?
After publishing my book, I was inspired to start a podcast to share my story with the world. This platform allowed me to delve deeper into my experiences and invite guests who could share their own stories of survival and hope. The response was overwhelming. My podcast quickly grew, reaching thousands of listeners every week, and each episode became a testament to the power of sharing our truths and breaking the silence around trauma.
One of the most touching moments came from a listener who reached out to tell me how my podcast had become a lifeline for her during a very dark period. She had endured similar experiences of abuse and felt isolated and hopeless. Listening to my podcast, hearing not only my story but those of my guests, gave her the courage to seek help and start her own healing process. Her message reminded me of the immense power that comes from creating spaces where people can share their experiences and support each other.
On the backend of my podcast’s success, an unexpected and thrilling opportunity arose. I was offered a film deal to turn my book into a movie. This new venture has ignited a fire in my belly as I now have the chance to bring these stories to an even wider audience through film. The process of adapting my book into a movie has been an incredible journey, blending my passion for advocacy with the power of visual storytelling.
Have you experienced anything negative? Do you feel there are drawbacks to writing a book that starts such a colossal conversation and change?
Yes, there have been negative experiences, including backlash from people who are uncomfortable with the topics I discuss. Some have accused me of oversharing or questioned my motives. Unfortunately, many of these critics come from my own ethnic origin, where there’s a strong cultural conditioning to suppress emotions and trauma. For me to speak out likely makes them feel uneasy and challenges deeply ingrained norms.
I understand that discussing personal and painful topics publicly can be unsettling for those who have been taught to remain silent. This cultural expectation often means that issues like abuse and mental health are swept under the rug, leaving many to suffer in silence.
However, I believe these drawbacks are far outweighed by the positive impact of sparking crucial conversations and driving change. By sharing my story and creating platforms for others to do the same, I aim to break the cycle of silence and shame. The overwhelming support and gratitude I’ve received from survivors who feel seen and understood far surpass the negativity. These brave individuals remind me of the importance of what I’m doing and reinforce my commitment to advocacy and healing.
Every story shared, every conversation started, is a step towards creating a more open and supportive environment for survivors. The backlash, though challenging, only underscores the necessity of my work. It highlights the resistance to change that we must overcome to ensure that future generations can live in a world where speaking out about trauma is not just accepted but encouraged.
Can you articulate why you think books in particular have the power to create movements, revolutions, and true change?
Books have the unique ability to reach people on a deeply personal level. They allow readers to engage with complex ideas and emotions at their own pace, creating space for reflection and growth. A powerful book can challenge societal norms, inspire action, and build communities around shared experiences and goals.
What is the one habit you believe contributed the most to you becoming a bestselling writer? (i.e., perseverance, discipline, play, craft study) Can you share a story or example?
Perseverance has been crucial. Writing about trauma was emotionally exhausting, but I remained committed to my goal. I dedicated time each day to writing, no matter how difficult it was. This discipline ensured that I stayed on track and completed my book, even when faced with self-doubt and emotional challenges.
What challenge or failure did you learn the most from in your writing career? Can you share the lesson(s) that you learned?
One significant challenge was overcoming self-doubt. Initially, I struggled with the fear that my story wasn’t worth sharing. However, I learned that authenticity and vulnerability are powerful tools. Embracing my truth and trusting that it would resonate with others was a critical lesson that ultimately made my book more impactful.
Many aspiring authors would love to make an impact like what you have done. What are the 5 things writers need to know if they want to spark a movement with a book? (please include a story or example for each)
I have uploaded the video onto my youtube channel:
1. Be Authentic: Share your true story and emotions. Authenticity resonates deeply with readers. When I first started writing my book, I hesitated to include the most painful parts of my story, fearing judgment and misunderstanding. However, I soon realised that authenticity was crucial. I vividly remember the day I decided to include the raw details of my experiences with childhood sexual abuse and domestic violence, it was a transformational experience for me as I had carried the shame all my life and it felt liberating to release the shame as this wasn’t mine to carry.
2. Research Thoroughly: Understand the issues you’re writing about. Knowledge adds credibility and depth. Before diving into the topic of trauma and recovery, I dedicated countless hours to research. I read academic papers, attended seminars, and consulted with mental health professionals. This thorough research enriched my writing, providing a solid foundation of credible information. For instance, when discussing coping strategies, I was able to reference specific therapeutic approaches, which added depth and authority to my work.
3. Engage with Your Audience: Build a community around your message. Interaction fosters a sense of belonging. Creating a podcast allowed me to directly engage with my audience. Each week, I received messages and comments from listeners sharing their own stories and thoughts. I created a Facebook support group which gave listeners a sense of community and belonging. Having direct engagement was a powerful reminder of the impact of my work.
4. Stay Persistent: The journey can be tough, but persistence will see you through.
There were numerous times when I felt like giving up, especially when facing backlash and criticism. However, I reminded myself why I started this journey. One particularly challenging period was during the early days of my podcast. The listener numbers were low, and I questioned whether my efforts were worthwhile. But persistence paid off. Gradually, the audience grew, and the feedback became overwhelmingly positive. Persistence saw me through the tough times, proving that continuing to push forward is essential, even when the path seems daunting.
5. Seek Feedback: Constructive criticism helps improve your work and broadens your perspective. Seeking feedback has been instrumental in my growth as a writer and advocate. After publishing the first draft of my book, I shared it with a group of trusted friends and colleagues for their honest opinions. Their constructive criticism was invaluable. One friend pointed out that some sections lacked clarity, which prompted me to revise and improve those parts. Another suggested including more practical advice for readers, which I did, enriching the book’s content. This feedback not only improved my work but also broadened my perspective, making my message stronger and more impactful.
The world, of course, needs progress in many areas. What movement do you hope someone (or you!) starts next? Can you explain why that is so important?
I hope to see a movement focused on comprehensive trauma education in schools. Understanding trauma’s effects from a young age can lead to early intervention and support, reducing long-term psychological impacts. Educating children and teachers about trauma can create more empathetic and supportive environments.
How can our readers follow you on social media?
Readers can follow me on Instagram : https://www.instagram.com/victim2victor_anuverma/
My film channel: https://www.instagram.com/silentscreams_dramafeaturefilm?igsh=cGZ1c2FibXg1Zzh2&utm_source=qr
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/anuvermaV2V
Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@victim_2_victor?_t=8jK6ouNRYlV&_r=1
They can also listen to my podcast, “Victim 2 Victor,” available on all major platforms.
Thank you so much for these insights. It was a true pleasure to do this with you.
Anu Verma Of Victim 2 Victor On How To Write A Book That Sparks A Movement was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.