It was really the Covid-19 pandemic that made me decide to bring my message to the world. I was watching the news report one day and was utterly shocked at the statistics. In that moment, I felt that I had to do something, whatever I could, to help. It has often been said that we’re all in the same boat but I couldn’t disagree more. We most certainly are not. We’re in the same storm. Everybody is affected in different ways and I observed that, while this terrible and indiscriminate virus was front and centre, everyday tragedies, such as pet loss, still occur.
As part of my series about “authors who are making an important social impact”, I had the pleasure of interviewing Wendy Andrew.
Wendy Andrew is a qualified Pet Bereavement Counsellor who studied with The International School for Canine Psychology and Behaviour Ltd. prior to opening The Scottish Pet Bereavement Counselling Service.
She initially studied pet bereavement counseling in order to support her dog walking clients when the time comes however quickly realized that this service should be available to anyone anywhere and brought the business online.
Wendy wrote her book ‘How To Recover From Pet Loss — Supporting you On Your Journey To Acceptance’ during lockdown which became a #1 Hot New Release on Amazon in multiple categories upon publication. Wendy has since guested on multiple podcasts both in the U.K and USA which is in keeping with her international purpose-driven business, especially as she spent time living in Cape Cod, Mass. USA.
Thank you so much for joining us in this interview series! Before we dive into the main focus of our interview, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you tell us a bit about your childhood backstory?
Thank you so much for inviting me! I grew up in the outskirts of Glasgow, Scotland and have been a lifelong animal lover. My parents were Kennel Club registered Labrador breeders so we always had dogs
around and a horse called Buster, which explains why I ended up being a dog walker and pet bereavement counselor. Animals have always been a huge part of my life and my family. We lived next door to a farm and a forest which was quite instrumental in my decision to become a vegetarian at the age of 14.
When you were younger, was there a book that you read that inspired you to take action or changed your life? Can you share a story about that?
I read To Kill A Mockingbird by Harper Lee when I was at school and I think that was a really inspiring book for me because it really highlighted the importance of seeing life from the perspective of others. To show kindness and compassion to everyone and not to judge. It’s a book that highlights issues that are sadly still relevant today, such a prejudice, tolerance and integrity. The main character Scout’s experiences inspires empathy which is essential as a pet bereavement counselor.
Can you share the funniest or most interesting mistake that occurred to you in the course of your career? What lesson or take away did you learn from that?
I took a television talk show to task over their handling of the topic of pet bereavement on social media and highlighted that they would have benefited from having an expert as a guest on the panel.
I learned that not everyone appreciates constructive criticism… but I’m still hopeful that they’ll consult me should they revisit the subject in the future.
Can you describe how you aim to make a significant social impact with your book?
I wrote my book as a low-cost alternative to counseling during this time of financial uncertainty and social restriction. With so many people facing job losses and financial hardship while being cut off from their usual support networks, such as family, friends and co-workers, I wanted to do something to let grieving pet parents know that support is still accessible and available to them.
The loss of a pet is often a child’s first experience of death, so it is vital to get it right. My book includes a chapter on how to support children which I think is arguably the most important chapter of all. Supporting families is very important to me.
I am a qualified Meditation Teacher and have studied many self-care practices so that I can offer advice on healthy coping strategies to my clients and now readers. There has been an increase in alcohol consumption and substance abuse during the pandemic so it’s really important for me to let people know that’s not the solution and to offer alternatives.
I actively encourage employers to incorporate Pet Bereavement Leave in their HR policies. That small act of compassion and understanding not only strengthens the relationship between employer and employee but also makes good business sense. A grief-stricken employee will undoubtedly be distracted at this time and more likely to make costly mistakes or even have an accident which could easily be avoided if given a little time to process. It also promotes the company as a forward-thinking and caring employer thus attracting the best of the best. Richard Branson has been quoted as saying that if you look after your staff, they will look after your business. A couple of days off is not a big ask in the grand scheme of things.
I am also on a mission to combat Disenfranchised Grief, which is grief not acknowledged or supported in society. Too many people face insensitive comments such as ‘It’s just a dog’ or ‘Get another cat’ which completely invalidates how they are feeling. They are perfectly entitled to grieve the loss of their companion regardless of species and it takes as long as it takes. That source of unconditional love in their life is gone and I would like to educate as many people as possible about the importance of compassion during this incredibly difficult experience. It doesn’t matter what you think, it’s about how that person feels. The only way I can see to do that, is to open the dialogue and talk about it, so I really appreciate the opportunity to raise awareness.
As you can see, I have a lot of work to do!
Can you share with us the most interesting story that you shared in your book?
I shared my own story of pet bereavement. I think, as an author and counselor, it’s important to be relatable. I wanted to share my story and how I felt in order to normalize the experience and end the taboo for my readers. I have been through this myself and I get it.
As a teenager, my dog Honey took off on one of her adventures but was tragically run over by a motorist. I was utterly devastated and wracked with guilt. The heartbreak was unbearable. But I learned so much from that experience and am much more vigilant with Pixie, my Pomchi (Pomeranian x Chihuahua). She is a huge part of my life and my business.
What was the “aha moment” or series of events that made you decide to bring your message to the greater world? Can you share a story about that?
It was really the Covid-19 pandemic that made me decide to bring my message to the world. I was watching the news report one day and was utterly shocked at the statistics. In that moment, I felt that I had to do something, whatever I could, to help. It has often been said that we’re all in the same boat but I couldn’t disagree more. We most certainly are not. We’re in the same storm. Everybody is affected in different ways and I observed that, while this terrible and indiscriminate virus was front and centre, everyday tragedies, such as pet loss, still occur.
Of course, not all feelings of grief come from the death of a pet. Throughout the pandemic, relationships have broken down which may result in an ex-partner taking the pet. Financial hardship has caused many to put their pets up for rehoming and there has been a shocking rise in dog theft due to the increase in demand for companion animals. I really felt for those experiencing feelings of grief and wanted to reach out and support them regardless of the circumstances of their loss.
Without sharing specific names, can you tell us a story about a particular individual who was impacted or helped by your cause?
Within days of publishing my book, I received an email from a delightful gentleman. I was so touched that it reduced me to tears. He informed me that he had just read my book and that it ‘answered my (his) prayers’. His dog had been diagnosed with stage 4 cancer just days previously and my book helped him to understand that his feelings were ‘justified and normal’. I wrote a chapter on Anticipatory Grief specifically for the purpose of identifying that feelings of grief can develop even before a bereavement.
When I was writing my book, I often said that if I could help just one person then it was a book worth writing. Mission accomplished… the fact that he was in his seventies and read it during the promotional period was just the cherry on the cake for me.
Are there three things the community/society/politicians can do to help you address the root of the problem you are trying to solve?
- The community/society, in general, can be more compassionate towards those who are grieving the loss of their companion animal.
- Politicians can legislate for pet bereavement leave within the workplace to become law.
- Both society and politicians can do better when it comes to mental health support. Make no mistake, grief is a matter of mental health and emotional wellbeing. Mental Health is everyone’s responsibility and we need to end the stigma.
How do you define “Leadership”? Can you explain what you mean or give an example?
Leadership for me is leading by example. Walk the walk, don’t just talk otherwise it’s a dictatorship. Roll your sleeves up, get stuck in, listen and always be open to learning. Hold your hands up and admit when you get it wrong; that’s inspiring. Do your best every day and show those around you how to follow your lead. You don’t have to be the best at what you do but if you are passionate and inspire others to do their best too then I don’t think you’re going to go too far off track.
What are your “5 things I wish someone told me when I first started” and why. Please share a story or example for each.
- There is rarely a ‘right time’ so just do it. — Waiting for the right time is often just procrastination or avoidance.
- Imposter Syndrome is more common than you think. — We have all had this nagging self-doubt at some point but if you believe in what you are doing then you are good enough. While I was writing, I often thought, ‘Who am I to write a book?’. I reminded myself that I am a person who cares and that’s why I was writing it.
- You might need to blaze your own trail. — If something doesn’t exist, create it. Don’t be afraid to rip up the rule book and do things your own way. What’s the worst that can happen? You learn from every experience so really, you can’t fail. You just do it differently next time.
- It’s O.K to ask for help. — Winging it only takes you so far. Chances are that there will always be a gap in your knowledge or skill set so don’t let pride stop you from filling that gap. Networking within your industry is super important.
- Rest and pay attention to self-care. — Entrepreneurs are prone to burnout. Fact. From the moment we wake up until the moment we close our eyes, we’re working. Even ideas and thinking is working. But you can’t pour from an empty cup so remember to rest. Sometimes doing nothing is the most productive thing you can do.
Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote”? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your life?
Don’t look back or you’ll fall.
This was actually said to me by my father when I was a young child learning to ride my bicycle. I thought he was still holding the back of the saddle and running alongside me, supporting me. But when I looked back and saw him way behind me on the track, I wobbled and sure enough, I fell off. I don’t know if I was overwhelmed by how far I had come on my own or if I was scared to proceed on my own but either way, it taught me the importance of staying focused, believing in myself and always looking forward. This has been relevant to me in so many ways and in so many situations.
Is there a person in the world, or in the US with whom you would like to have a private breakfast or lunch with, and why? He or she might just see this, especially if we tag them. 🙂
Sir David Attenborough. He is a national treasure and has devoted his life to educating us all about the planet, the environment and every living creature upon it. He is such an inspiration and I’m sure he has many interesting stories still to tell us.
How can our readers further follow your work online?
Your readers can follow me on Instagram @the_spbcs, Twitter @The_SPBCS, or on Facebook @thescottishpetbereavementcounsellingservice which is where I’m most active and have built up a beautiful and supportive little community.
This was very meaningful, thank you so much. We wish you only continued success on your great work!
About The Interviewer: Growing up in Canada, Edward Sylvan was an unlikely candidate to make a mark on the high-powered film industry based in Hollywood. But as CEO of Sycamore Entertainment Group Inc, (SEGI) Sylvan is among a select group of less than ten Black executives who have founded, own and control a publicly traded company. Now, deeply involved in the movie business, he is providing opportunities for people of color.
In 2020, he was appointed president of the Monaco International Film Festival, and was encouraged to take the festival in a new digital direction.
Raised in Toronto, he attended York University where he studied Economics and Political Science, then went to work in finance on Bay Street, (the city’s equivalent of Wall Street). After years of handling equities trading, film tax credits, options trading and mergers and acquisitions for the film, mining and technology industries, in 2008 he decided to reorient his career fully towards the entertainment business.
With the aim of helping Los Angeles filmmakers of color who were struggling to understand how to raise capital, Sylvan wanted to provide them with ways to finance their creative endeavors.
At Sycamore Entertainment he specializes in print and advertising financing, marketing, acquisition and worldwide distribution of quality feature-length motion pictures, and is concerned with acquiring, producing and promoting films about equality, diversity and other thought provoking subject matter which will also include nonviolent storytelling.
Also in 2020, Sylvan launched SEGI TV, a free OTT streaming network built on the pillars of equality, sustainability and community which is scheduled to reach 100 million U.S household televisions and 200 million mobile devices across Roku, Amazon Fire TV, Apple TV, Samsung Smart TV and others.
As Executive Producer he currently has several projects in production including The Trials of Eroy Brown, a story about the prison system and how it operated in Texas, based on the best-selling book, as well as a documentary called The Making of Roll Bounce, about the 2005 coming of age film which starred rapper Bow Wow and portrays roller skating culture in 1970’s Chicago.
He sits on the Board of Directors of Uplay Canada, (United Public Leadership Academy for Youth), which prepares youth to be citizen leaders and provides opportunities for Canadian high school basketball players to advance to Division 1 schools as well as the NBA.
A former competitive go kart racer with Checkered Flag Racing Ltd, he also enjoys traveling to exotic locales. Sylvan resides in Vancouver and has two adult daughters.
Sylvan has been featured in Forbes, the Wall Street Journal, the New York Times and has been seen on Fox Business News, CBS and NBC. Sycamore Entertainment Group Inc is headquartered in Seattle, with offices in Los Angeles and Vancouver.
Social Impact Authors: How & Why Author Wendy Andrew Is Helping To Change Our World was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.