I believe the definition of a leader is someone who can touch, move, inspire, and influence others into action. It’s about valuing the people that surround you and recognizing all the gifts they have that can contribute to the overall health of the task at hand.
As part of my series about “authors who are making an important social impact”, I had the pleasure of interviewing Rose Ann Forte.
Rose Ann is an alcohol-free coach and bestselling author of the book called “The Plans He Has For Me, a 12 Week Daily Devotional for Freedom from Alcohol”. She was a successful C-Suite executive and working mom of four who used alcohol to excess and found a transformative way to change her relationship with alcohol using a positive and faith-based approach. She hopes to remove the shame involved with all of the current languaging around excessive use of alcohol (alcoholic, recovery, addiction and sober) and instead empower people with the understanding of God’s will for their life. With God at the center, she wants people to develop the confidence to choose a different path forward because “Choosing to be alcohol free is a great way to live!”
Thank you so much for joining us in this interview series! Before we dive into the main focus of our interview, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you tell us a bit about your childhood backstory?
I was the child of a father who dropped out of high school at 16 and a mother who was a high school graduate. Despite the lack of formal education, my father was very entrepreneurial and street-smart. My parents were both working parents, so I was a “latch key kid” and was home alone for much of my high school teenage years. I had the time to experiment with a lot of things including cigarettes, alcohol, and various drugs. Like most teenagers, I felt like a misfit in many ways, and I wanted to fit in. I thought if I did those things then I could be “cool” like the other kids.
I was a pretty smart kid, despite my rebel tendencies of skipping school and partying. Also, my dad always encouraged me to dream big, so I was very focused on succeeding in lie. I ended up being the first (and only) child in my family to attend college and graduated with degrees in accountancy and management. I was goal focused and everything I did, I did with a passion, including partying.
When you were younger, was there a book that you read that inspired you to take action or changed your life? Can you share a story about that?
My parents were working class and did not emphasize reading, so books were not really my thing when I was growing up. However, I did eventually have exposure to the Bible and this ultimately had the greatest influence on my life. This faith-based focus later inspired me to write The Plans He Has For Me during a difficult time in my life, giving me strength and a purpose that I never thought possible prior. I am very grateful because I feel like God worked through me in this way, and I am excited to be part of creating a book that inspires others to take action and change their lives for the better and see a different plan for their own lives, His plan.
It has been said that our mistakes can be our greatest teachers. Can you share a story about the funniest mistake you made when you were first starting? Can you tell us what lesson you learned from that?
First of all, I should explain that I am a master of mistakes. There are too many examples to choose from because of the many missteps I experienced in my own life’s journey. However, I have learned not to look at mistakes as failures; I now see them as learning opportunities and steppingstones to a greater vision. In that way, I view mistakes as a way of earning wisdom! So, I guess you could say I am a very wise person! Ha ha ha.
When I look back at my life overall, I think the funniest mistake I made relates to irony over humor. My mistake was to pay attention to what the world tells you is important, and then to base my life around that belief. I put my faith into the promise that money, status, power, and INSTANT gratification are the keys to happiness. For a long time, I chased those promises, believing what the media and movies told me were true. Later, I realized that these things do not provide the inner peace, authentic joy and sense of purpose that we all desire in our hearts.
This revelation initiated two powerful lessons that changed my life. The first one deals with gratitude. When you focus on what you are grateful for throughout your day and train your perspective to always see the gifts that are offered in each moment, your life becomes a powerful and inspiring experience. This shift in perspective is a game-changer and can completely alter how you perceive things that go “wrong.” Gratitude allows you to look at everything in a new light and to be a light for others, as well.
The second lesson deals with awareness. Our brains are designed in such a way that 10% of our minds are able to observe the other 90% of our subconscious operating system. Our subconscious minds tend to run the show in a lot of ways, by storing information that we have deemed is important, and using stored data to direct our choices and motivate our goals. Unfortunately, big and small traumas in our lives get registered in our subconscious as important. Based on those traumas we can develop stories that tell us the world is a dangerous place and we can convince ourselves to live in fear for most of our lives. While it is important to discern truly dangerous situations, it is NOT good to assume all fears are rational and based on truth. This is where awareness comes in because awareness can help us take back our control and become more purposeful in our lives. Awareness is essential when it comes to shifting non-serving operating programs or motivations that come from our subconscious mind and redirecting our attention to creating a version of ourselves that uses our God-given gifts and talents to the fullest extent.
With these two lessons in mind, I developed a daily routine for myself that includes gratitude and awareness. When gratitude becomes a practice, it allows us to look for the good in every situation. The glass really does become half full instead of half empty. When awareness is a practice, you discover the power of discernment. If I experience fear and anxiety, is it based on a situation I can overcome and control or is it part of my fear-based flight-or-fight system? The bottom line is that fear kills joy. It causes stress and takes a toll on our overall health and well-being. Through awareness, we can focus on what we can actually influence and take intentional actions that move us accordingly. Otherwise, we are spinning our wheels in fruitless ways. Sometimes, when things are out of our control (ex: Ukraine and Russia, Covid, etc.), we need to let go and include those people and situations in our prayers and allow God to handle it!
Can you describe how you aim to make a significant social impact with your book?
My goal in writing this book is to help people end their compulsive drinking habits and transform their lives in meaningful and empowering ways. My approach is to expose the lie of alcohol, to shift the language around this compulsive habit, and to create a framework that offers tangible ways to find lasting freedom. Ultimately, through this program participants connect on a deeper level with God and their purpose in life, and this inspiring process of discovery makes alcohol a distant memory as this incredible new reality emerges instead.
Unfortunately, there are far too many people in the world that have gotten caught in the lie of alcohol. They are stuck with the compulsive loop of wanting to leave this habit and they are simultaneously trying to convince themselves they need it in their lives. They start believing the lie that they are too weak to overcome it. This repetitive routine can feel like a dark trap and can cause a sense of shame because their drinking habit feels out of their control. People secretly suffer because of repeated conversations with themselves on how to control their drinking, and they are embarrassed about admitting alcohol has become a problem.
My journal and other works seek to end the shame and blame game and instead empower readers by illustrating to them that the flaw is not personal (they are not weak!). Readers just need to understand how to change a habit that has been securely formed by the brain! After getting through the initial physical discomfort phase that comes with detoxing from a substance, we are left with a deeply engrained neurological habit. The journal offers scriptural support through the elimination phase and a framework for revisioning the mindset necessary for true change.
My aim is to move away from the isolating shame experienced by compulsive drinkers and open up the conversation in more empowering ways. To achieve this, I remove a lot of the negative vocabulary that has historically been used (ex: alcoholic, recovery, addiction and sober). I believe these terms keep people in victimhood. Therefore, my primary message is about freedom of choice, and I want people to be empowered by their decision to live alcohol free. As I mentioned before, we do need to eliminate the addictive substance at the front end (usually the first 2 weeks). After that, it’s about redirecting the neurological pathway that has been deeply engrained. For years and sometimes decades we have habitually turned to alcohol in times of stress and happiness, fun and despair. As a result, we have created a neurological habit that is directing our subconscious thinking which means our daily life is dictated by this program. Fortunately, we can write a new program because of something called neuroplasticity of the brain, As we change these pathways, we discover a new level of authentic happiness, mindfulness, joy, and connection. Suddenly, the approach shifts from “I am flawed and need to stay away from alcohol” to “I am loving life and do not want anything to slow me down.” Ultimately, the narrative I want people to discover, and embrace is that they are “choosing an alcohol-free life because it’s a much better way to live!” No shame is needed in that statement.
This is a global problem. People are suffering and dying from this, and they need help. Statistics show that one in seven people worldwide suffer from an alcohol problem. Furthermore, people are dying at an alarming rate. Recent statistics show that one in five deaths in the United States for people ages nineteen to forty-nine are related to alcohol! That’s 20%… and that’s a 2019 statistic. Reports are emerging now which indicate that this statistic has increased by 25% since Covid. In fact, a recent report was issued that showed alcoholic liver disease was up in the UK by a whopping 40% in 2020.
These are serious statistics, especially considering that people often hide this problem, so this number is realistically much higher! There is an ever-growing number of people in the world that need help in finding freedom from alcohol. My intention is to show people that God has a better plan for them. Walking with Him for eighty-four straight days allows us to see that truth, and that experience also allows us to understand the wisdom of His Word. Many believe that God created a bunch of rules to make life boring and restrict us from enjoying ourselves. Quite frankly, it’s the exact opposite. God created guidelines for us to follow because He loves us so much, and He didn’t want us to suffer. In other words, He created rules to protect us and help us navigate our lives effectively.
Through my journal I hope people are able to experience the truth that we were all created with gifts and talents that are meant to be shared with the world. Likely we are not discovering or pursuing these gifts because of the time spent using alcohol, the time spent recovering from drinking alcohol and the time spent thinking about how to stop drinking alcohol. When we remove alcohol for a period of time, we get to replace this drain with something that gives us joy. We then get to measure and document how much better our lives are as a result of removing that substance. We get to choose how to move forward based on the evidence that is provided in this short twelve-week period.
Can you share with us the most interesting story that you shared in your book?
Certainly the most interesting story shared in this book is the evolution of the relationship between the reader and God who is speaking through those pages. Readers’ lives have been transformed, finally released from the psychological slavery of their habit — not by fighting the habit itself, but by relying on and connecting with a loving and powerful God who has a bigger plan for them. The daily devotional embeds a daily walk with scripture, reflection, and prayer. Daily nuggets of wisdom are shared each day to support the reader and help him or her stay the path during the twelve-week period. A Day 1 excerpt follows to understand the gentle and encouraging nature of each day:
1 Timothy 4:15 (ESV)
Practice these things, immerse yourself in them,
so that all may see your progress.
Mindful Minute
This journey is a journey of practice and rewiring the beautiful mind God created for each of us (or for renewing it as Paul writes in Romans 12). He created a mind that saves us energy and remembers routine behaviors so we don’t need to re-teach them to ourselves each time we do them. Think about how we can drive to and from work and not remember how we even got there and back to our driveway. Think about the routine you do before you go to bed at night. There isn’t much thought put into these things because it’s the perfect energy-saving mechanism designed by our Creator.
When we allow sinful practices to enter our daily routines, those perfect energy-saving pathways are also engaged; except this time the consequences can be harmful instead of helpful. During this twelve-week journey, we will commit to practicing a different way of processing our triggers related to our alcohol drinking habits. Twelve weeks is the target so you may truly see your progress. You can choose whatever path you believe is best for you after this period, but for these twelve weeks we will start practicing for the purpose of seeing progress and feeling how the Holy Spirit will work within us as we move this bad habit to the side.
Prayer
I am committed to practicing, Father. I want to embody integrity with my word to you during these twelve weeks. I will spend this period focused on your grace, love, and forgiveness. I will commit to living a life of appreciation for everything good in my life and give thanks to you. I will walk steadily in the path of your Word for these twelve weeks so my progress may be evident to me and to all who I encounter. Thank you, Jesus.
What was the “aha moment” or series of events that made you decide to bring your message to the greater world? Can you share a story about that?
My “aha moment” was directly inspired by God. As a Christian, I had prayed to God for years asking him to remove this “habit” from my life. Looking back, I can see that I wanted God to take away my problem without having to do any of the work on my end. I did not want to deal with the discomfort of change, and in many ways, I just wanted God to “magically transform” me and make my issues go away. However, I began to realize that I needed to participate in some of the process to renew my mind. To hold myself accountable, I entered a secular group coaching program for putting alcohol aside for ninety days, and I finally experienced freedom from psychological slavery of my drinking habit.
I was definitely guided to this program by God, and I recognized biblical wisdom in almost everything that was being taught in the coaching program, even though it was secular. Although there was a lot of wisdom in the strategies and support from this program, my pastor captured what was missing: “The world is teaching the Kingdom without the King.” I had finally made progress and found freedom from alcohol, but I truly began to transform when I started to apply biblical principles to my experience, and that was the missing piece in my ninety-day secular program. When I connected my experience to God, the sacrifice of Jesus on the cross, and God’s Word through Scripture, I understood that God had a plan for me, and this beautiful and evolving experience replaced the shallow space once occupied by alcohol in ways that were beyond my wildest dreams. I literally felt empowered by the Holy Spirit and It dawned on me that this process of transformation needed to be documented because there was nothing like it in the church or secular community. The Plans He Has For Me was born because the Holy Spirit prompted me to teach the Kingdom with the King and provide the same transformational opportunities I had experienced.
Without sharing specific names, can you tell us a story about a particular individual who was impacted or helped by your cause?
I am humbled by the sheer numbers of people who have reached out to me to share how The Plans He Has For Me has changed their lives. I have so many inspiring stories I would love to share, but one favorite deals with a coaching client who had left her journal on her coffee table. Her father picked it up at a family event, and after reading some pages asked if he could borrow the book. My client shares that this event was the last day he ever drank! He read the journal and stayed the course. Over a year has passed since that day he began reading the journal, and to my knowledge, he is still alcohol free. A similar story was shared by a reader whose sister purchased the book for her husband. She testifies that the transformation in him is a complete miracle.
Testimonials like this continue to come in each day, from individuals sharing about their personal experience, or from family members, friends, and spouses who have observed incredible transformations. But sometimes it is even better to hear directly from someone who’s life was changed. Here is a note that was just sent to me from someone reading the journal and participating in the coaching program we have available. At the time of her writing, she was on Day 44 (week 7) of her alcohol free journey: “The Plans He Has for Me 12-week program is grounding me, and I was easily able to put alcohol to the side after committing to the program and following the guidelines… the book is my rock; I read it every day and journal. My life has changed to a more centered way of living, and from there I make healthy choices… I am calmer, clear, have energy and, most importantly, have found a connection with God that awakened inside of me and has given me purpose in this journey to live the life that I am meant to live.”
I think this message really captures what I am trying to facilitate through this book. The coaching program is completely affordable and is for people who want some extra support. I am constantly brainstorming additional ways I can help people out there who want the hope and strength necessary to change (i.e.: developing a podcast, articles, authoring more helpful books). Ultimately, my goal is to help people find freedom from psychological slavery and activate the power to create their best lives possible… the lives God intended them to live.
Are there three things the community/society/politicians can do to help you address the root of the problem you are trying to solve?
Yes! There are so many things our community and political leaders could do to address the root problem of alcohol abuse and the ever increase in deaths associated with it. Here are my top three:
- Add warning labels (serious ones) to alcohol containers. The bottom line is alcohol has become one of the leading causes of preventable death worldwide.
- Ban alcohol advertisements–just as cigarette advertisements were banned decades ago. We need to stop glorifying alcohol in the media, and model and teach alternative ways to handle stress and anxiety
- Demonstrate compassion towards those that fall into the alcohol trap instead of victimizing and labeling them. We need to offer hope and tangible solutions to find true freedom
How do you define “Leadership”? Can you explain what you mean or give an example?
I believe the definition of a leader is someone who can touch, move, inspire, and influence others into action. It’s about valuing the people that surround you and recognizing all the gifts they have that can contribute to the overall health of the task at hand.
What are your “5 things I wish someone told me when I first started” and why? Please share a story or example for each.
Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote”? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your life?
There are many quotes, scriptures, and words of wisdom that inspire me to be the best person I can possible be. However, after I began choosing to live a life that was alcohol free, I found my purpose for His Kingdom. I began waking up with the same mantra every day. Every day the same thought would greet me; the same “life lesson quote” popped into my mind every morning — on its own. I was greeted by the thought: “What’s next, God?!”
To this day this favorite thought greets me. This life lesson quote is filled with the feelings of excitement and anticipation. I have broken through so many barriers since I faced my fears and took a step, starting with an alcohol-free journey but arriving somewhere so much bigger and better. Now I feel like I buckle my seat belt each day to see where God takes me next. This experience fills me with a sense of awe and adventure.
I have discovered that the only limits to what was possible in my life were the self-imposed ones I had created for my life. For example, for many years my head was actually filled with false thoughts that I was worthless and unlovable. I was often hard on myself when I made mistakes and forgiving myself was a foreign concept. Gratefully, I don’t live that way anymore. Through this journey, I have come to understand how to rely on His truths and not the opinions of others in this world. I have also learned about the process involved in forgiveness of self and others.
Luckily, I realized that I was the one responsible for changing my inner narrative, and my life was completely transformed as a result. I am no longer a victim of my past, and my daily greeting affirms that “what’s next God?!” sense of wonder and potential.
Is there a person in the world, or in the US with whom you would like to have a private breakfast or lunch with, and why? He or she might just see this, especially if we tag them. 🙂
There is a global hero on the rise that I would be honored to meet for many reasons. Scott Harris is the founder of the nonprofit Charity Water (www.charitywater.org), which is an organization striving to provide clean and safe water to people and communities around the world. For starters, I love the story of Scott’s transformation. Scott was a nightclub promoter who was heavily caught up in alcohol and other vices. After over a decade of this lifestyle, he hit a wall and wanted to change. Scott dropped the club job and volunteered for two years on a ship that provided medical care around the world. At a significant spiritual, moral, and emotional low at the start of this new path, Scott began to heal and restore himself as he served others. He also began observing how horrid the water conditions were across the globe; he realized this was in international epidemic. Scott began to discover how to apply his gifts in a way that helped the world. The former nightclub manager turned founder and director of Charity Water, and this nonprofit has been providing safe and clean drinking water to over twenty-two countries and 15,503,622 people since 2006!
Scott also wrote a memoir about his journey titled Thirst which is “an inspiring personal story of redemption, second chances, and the transformative power within us all” (www.charitywater.org/about/scott-harrison-story). I love the story of Charity Water because Scott was able to take the transgressions in his life and turn them into gifts and opportunities. Not only has he walked away from toxic alcohol and a draining lifestyle, but he now works on transforming the lives of people all over the world by providing access to healing waters. This type of shift is exactly what I am seeking to provide through my own program, encouraging people to create and desire an alcohol-free life because of the amazing opportunities and experiences they encounter as a result. In fact, the cover of my book The Plans He Has For Me has a picture of a bright, clear, clean glass of healing water. I feel connected to Scott by his story of transformation and by his desire to help others, and I would love to be able to collaborate with him one day in the future. In short, I admire Scott’s inspiring work as a nonprofit founder and director, author, and overall awesome human being!
How can our readers further follow your work online?
People can download my free Kickstart Method for Alcohol Freedom by going to my website at www.theplanshehasforme.com. I can also be followed on Instagram and TikTok @roseannforteplans If they purchase the book, there will be a QR code that allows them to get access to a private Facebook group where like-minded people are taking the same challenge. The link for the book can be found at https://www.amazon.co.uk/Plans-He-Has-Me-Devotional-ebook/dp/B0BB8RDWBD
This was very meaningful, thank you so much. We wish you only continued success on your great work!
Social Impact Authors: How & Why Author Rose Ann Forte Is Helping To Change Our World was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.