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Rachel Coleman Of College Essay Editor: 5 Ways Empathy Will Affect Your Leadership

An Interview With Cynthia Corsetti

Collaboration. Essay editing is not a solo job! The majority of my work is collaborating with students to find their voice, and understand their point of view, even as we discuss the most compelling way to articulate that view. By embracing my empathetic style of leadership, I’ve been able to empower students to be more effective writers — especially because they don’t feel like they have to do it alone!

Empathy, the ability to understand and share the feelings of another, is increasingly recognized as a pivotal leadership trait. In an ever-evolving business landscape, leaders who exhibit genuine empathy are better equipped to connect, inspire, and drive their teams towards success. But how exactly does empathy shape leadership dynamics? How can it be harnessed to foster stronger relationships, improved decision-making, and a more inclusive work environment? As part of this series, we had the pleasure of interviewing Rachel Coleman.

Rachel Coleman is an IEC (independent education consultant) and Co-Founder of College Essay Editor (https://collegeessayeditor.com) who has worked for 8+ years as an independent business owner in the college admissions counseling field, helping high school students across all disciplines navigate their academics, financial aid, and college applications. Rachel received her B.A. in Comparative Literature from Stanford University and her College Counseling Certificate from UCLA. She is now an active member of HECA (Higher Education Consultants Association).

Thank you so much for joining us in this interview series. Before we dive into our discussion about empathy, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you share with us the backstory about what brought you to your specific career path?

I worked consistently as a writing tutor throughout high school and college, culminating in leading Stanford’s Hume Center for Writing and Speaking during my senior year. When I graduated with Honors in 2014, I took a job working as a Legislative Correspondent in the U.S. Senate. After a year, however, I found myself missing my work with students on their writing, and missing my own writing as well. So, after much reflection, I decided to quit my government job and start my own company focused on empowering students to be effective writers. I originally thought I would become more of an English tutor, helping students struggling in writing-based classes become better at essay writing.

But then, I discovered the highest demand for writing tutors was in the college application process. The majority of students I talked with needed help figuring out what to write (and how to write) the myriad of college application essays. That’s when I decided to focus my business exclusively on college application essay writing support. Today, I help students write their college application essays for undergraduate and graduate-level programs, as well as support them with financial aid and scholarship planning.

Can you share the most interesting story that happened to you since you started your career?

The financial aid system in U.S. colleges and universities can be difficult for families to navigate. Becoming an expert in this system has led me to almost “proselytize” financial aid information and tips to the families I work with. For example, one of the most interesting stories that has happened to me was helping an international student become the first person in their family to attend college in the United States, and attend for nearly free!

My goal is for all of the students I work with to graduate without debt. My favorite stories are when students can attend college for the price of $0 or close to zero, and their families can save the money they would have spent on undergrad education for other expenses, like future graduate school!

What do you think makes your company stand out? Can you share a story?

The individualized expertise that I bring to my work is what makes my company stand out. Having personally gone through the rigorous admissions process that characterizes getting accepted to the country’s most selective universities, I’m able to offer students insights that I’ve gained firsthand from my experience. In fact, in 2015, my partner and I successfully petitioned Stanford (under the legal auspices of the FERPA law) to provide us with access to our own admissions records. As we read what the Stanford admission team members wrote as they evaluated our own applications, we received an even deeper level of insight into the admissions process.

There are many large firms in the industry, but I’ve been able to offer something different by providing this expertise one-on-one, often dedicating many hours to a single student’s essay as we brainstorm ways to improve it. This individualized attention — rarely available at larger firms where there’s pressure to rapidly churn out essays — is something I’m particularly proud of.

You are a successful business leader. Which three character traits do you think were most instrumental to your success? Can you please share a story or example for each?

Empathy. In my role as a writing tutor, empathy is vital when empowering students to brainstorm a plotline and write down their own personal stories. Whether I’m putting myself in my students’ shoes as I give them helpful feedback, or attentively listening to their perspective as they share the story of a childhood trauma with me, empathy is what allows me to be the best essay tutor I can. In one notable instance, a student told me the story of how she used ChatGPT to help her write an History essay (English was her 3rd language) because she was scared her English language ability was not good enough. While some teachers had little empathy for cheating (and I in no way condone presenting ChatGPT content as a student’s own writing), I did understand why she was afraid. Together, she and I brainstormed and wrote an Additional Information essay (an optional essay in the Common Application used to explain unusual circumstances) about the reasons behind her use of ChapGPT and why she would never ever do it again in college.

Meticulousness. Keeping track of many students across different countries, educational systems, and with different university aspirations demands a keen attention to detail. I love that I can help students by keeping track of every activity and helping them succeed. For example, after working with a student for several years, I was able to remember activities even he didn’t remember to use as inspiration for a specific essay prompt connected with that activity.

Foresight. The higher education landscape is constantly shifting. I consider my foresight and ability to stay ahead of the trends a key reason families hire me. But it’s not innate! I develop this foresight through the myriad of college presentations, continuing education seminars, discussions with admissions reps, etc. By cultivating my knowledge and network, I’m able to make better, more informed, predictions about topics like the future of standardized testing, the new FAFSA regulations, what medical schools are looking for, and more!

Leadership often entails making difficult decisions or hard choices between two apparently good paths. Can you share a story with us about a hard decision or choice you had to make as a leader? I’m curious to understand how these challenges have shaped your leadership.

My leadership style involves meeting students where they are at and maintaining the student’s privacy. While parents are invited to attend the first meeting with me so we can all get to know each other, subsequent meetings are solely for the student and me to work together on their writing. Some parents are a bit surprised by this, but I explain that students are more honest and authentic when we work together one-on-one than when their parents are listening in. Not to mention the students produce better writing! I also stress that I will never share a student’s essay with their parents without their consent.

The results of this policy have been outstanding. Students feel free to be themselves, and parents are regularly surprised by the quality of writing their students can produce.

Ok, thank you for that. Let’s now jump to the primary focus of our interview. Let’s begin with a basic definition so that all of us are on the same page. How do you define empathy in a leadership context, and why do you believe it’s a vital trait for leaders to possess in today’s work environment?

I am proud of being an empathetic leader to my students. If I’m perfectly honest, if a student starts crying during a meeting as she shares a particularly vicious story of being bullied, the odds are high that I will cry too! That’s actually how I define empathy in a leadership context: meeting students where they are emotionally. Whether that’s celebrating victories or showing solidarity during defeats, leading with empathy is what I think makes me a better writing coach and a more trustworthy person to share intimate details with.

The college admissions essay is one of the most personal compositions a student will write in their career, and the writing can only achieve that level of honesty if the student feels comfortable articulating their vulnerabilities to another person. My empathetic style of leadership invites that kind of vulnerability necessary to this process. My students know that, while I may be editing their essays, or suggesting they re-frame a plot point, I will never be sitting in judgment of them. In fact, I think empathy is an invaluable trait for any leader, whether in a teaching role, a mentorship role, or a management role. Without empathy, a leader cannot lead.

Can you share a personal experience where showing empathy as a leader significantly impacted a situation or relationship in your organization?

I regularly utilize empathy in my teaching and essay editing because I want every student to not only feel heard, but understood. Sometimes that takes additional questioning, sometimes that takes giving the student space and time to get it all out, but ultimately, a good writing coach is an empathetic listener.

In one memorable personal experience, I spent a lot of time talking through a student’s essay about coming out as gay to her parents. The parents were conservative, and did not support the student’s sexuality, let alone that topic as the main essay for college applications. Nevertheless, they listened to my rational arguments about why this topic was the right topic for the student, and we were able to find common ground. Without empathy for my student first and foremost, as well as empathy for the conservative parents who were ultimately simply afraid, these conversations would not have been possible.

How do empathetic leaders strike a balance between understanding their team’s feelings and making tough decisions that might not be universally popular?

Empathy lays the foundation for informing the tough decisions that leaders need to make — it does not eliminate a leader’s rationality or responsibility to make the decisions that are necessary for the company to function. I love the Graham Greene quote that there’s a “splinter of ice” in the heart of every writer, and I think this sentiment pertains to leaders as well as writers. Yes, the leader (or writer) needs to empathize with the people they are working with, gathering accurate data from the team, but good leaders should not lose their objectivity when finding a solution to a difficult problem. An effective leader must balance emotional connection with emotional objectivity — not always an easy task!

How would you differentiate between empathy and sympathy in leadership? Why is it important for leaders to distinguish between the two?

Sympathy in leadership is the bird’s eye view — pity delivered from up above. Empathy on the other hand, is solidarity, being on the ground with the student or team you’re mentoring and experiencing firsthand what that student is going through. While there is a time and place for both stances, it is only with empathy that leaders can truly understand where their students are coming from.

What are some practical strategies or exercises that leaders can employ to cultivate and enhance their empathetic skills?

Ask questions. The first step to achieving any kind of empathy starts with humility, starts with admitting that you might not have all the answers or know what your student is experiencing. Far too often in the educational setting there is a power imbalance between teacher and student, where the teacher gives dictates from on high, and the student merely follows orders — this dynamic is anathema to the learning process! Instead, teachers should ask students questions about their lives, their hopes, their fears, and tailor the instruction to where the student is in the learning process.

How can empathy help leaders navigate the complexities of leading diverse teams and ensure inclusivity?

Empathy is the best tool for navigating working with a diverse set of students because it promotes humility. Rather than a teacher simply assuming they know what the student is facing at home or in the classroom, an empathetic teacher knows to ask questions, to learn from the student, so that together the teacher and student can not only achieve mutual understanding, but so the student feels comfortable to ask questions in return.

What’s your approach to ensuring that succession planning is a holistic process, and not just confined to the top layers of management? How do you communicate this philosophy through the organization?

In my role as a writing teacher, succession planning is not a part of my business.

Based on your experience and research, can you please share “5 Ways Empathy Will Affect Your Leadership”?

1. Active Listening. A big part of my job is listening to the stories my students tell me, and knowing when to ask questions v. when to simply listen. As their editor / writing supporter, I will never do any of the writing for them, but we will have long discussions about the best way to tell a story, and the best way to showcase their character. Empathy enables this active listening! Having those important conversations demands, not just patience, but active listening to help elicit the most important personal stories from students.

2. Demonstrating trustworthiness. When students are sharing private stories about their personal lives, they need to trust the person they’re speaking with. By being honest in return, and sharing, when appropriate, personal stories from my own life, I can better connect with my students. For example, when students share their challenges of changing high schools mid-way through, I can speak about my own experience changing high schools and how I dealt with it. Ultimately, students need an essay editing coach who is trustworthy, who does not reveal their details without their permission, and who shows empathy for the situations they’re going through.

3. Emotional Support. Leading with empathy means leaning into the different emotional support languages. I love that I can be the emotional support, the cheerleader, the friendly face offering a shoulder to cry on, to my students. And empathy is what makes that support possible.

4. Collaboration. Essay editing is not a solo job! The majority of my work is collaborating with students to find their voice, and understand their point of view, even as we discuss the most compelling way to articulate that view. By embracing my empathetic style of leadership, I’ve been able to empower students to be more effective writers — especially because they don’t feel like they have to do it alone!

5. Modeling humility. To me, to be empathetic is to be humble, to recognize that other people have insights you don’t have. That’s a big part of why I love my job! I get to learn from my students and their perspectives just as they learn how to communicate those perspectives in writing from me. The fact that this learning is happening on a two-way street makes students more willing to open up, and helps us produce writing that is more authentic, and more vulnerable.

Are there potential pitfalls or challenges associated with being an empathetic leader? How can these be addressed?

Empathy can be a double-edged sword at times. While it’s an important tool to support students and encourage students to open up in their writing, being empathetic 24/7 can be exhausting for the practitioner. I’ve found that the best way for me to stay at the top of my game is to be a part of a community that understands my work. I’m so grateful for the HECA (Higher Education Consultants Association) community and the way it supports its members. Not only does HECA provide lots of continuing education workshops, but being a part of a community that understands my business (and its challenges) is an important way to stay emotionally resilient. For me, the goal is to use my support networks, so as to never be burned out!

Off-topic, but I’m curious. As someone steering the ship, what thoughts or concerns often keep you awake at night? How do those thoughts influence your daily decision-making process?

I’m regularly concerned about the state of higher education in the United States. From that pandemic’s exacerbation of mental health issues in high school students, to the ballooning cost of college, to the federal government’s too-slow rollout of the new FAFSA, there are a lot of issues that keep me awake at night. In response, I find myself waking up the next morning and setting out to get more information so I can keep my students better informed. That’s how I tend to approach most problems: step one is always getting more information.

As the leader of my organization, I regularly sign up for additional webinars and workshops on new topics in higher education. From researching new study abroad programs, to interpreting data about the real-word effects about the Supreme Court’s affirmative action decision, to hopping on a call with an admissions rep about a new tuition discount program for out-of-state students at a particular college, I’m always on the lookout for new resources and guidance I can offer my students.

You are a person of great influence. If you could start a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger. 🙂

I would start the “Financial Aid Literacy Movement.” You may have heard of Financial Literacy Month (April), and the movement to empower people to take the reins of their own finances. Well, I would love to lead the charge for financial aid literacy as well! There are so many families who do not realize how much they could be saving in the college process, not to mention the students who think college is unaffordable, when they could actually be attending tuition-free. I currently make financial aid planning, and finding a school that’s the right “financial fit” a core part of my counseling, but I hope this movement grows so more Americans are aware of the educational opportunities that are available to them!

How can our readers further follow you online?

Please visit my website: https://collegeessayeditor.com/

And my blog: https://collegeessayeditor.com/essay-editing-blog/

Thank you for the time you spent sharing these fantastic insights. We wish you only continued success in your great work!

About the Interviewer: Cynthia Corsetti is an esteemed executive coach with over two decades in corporate leadership and 11 years in executive coaching. Author of the upcoming book, “Dark Drivers,” she guides high-performing professionals and Fortune 500 firms to recognize and manage underlying influences affecting their leadership. Beyond individual coaching, Cynthia offers a 6-month executive transition program and partners with organizations to nurture the next wave of leadership excellence.


Rachel Coleman Of College Essay Editor: 5 Ways Empathy Will Affect Your Leadership was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.