Pastor Jessica Landmon Of Women Get Real Ministries On Finding Happiness and Joy During Turbulent Times
An Interview With Jake Frankel
Turn your eyes off your situation and help someone else. We get so hyper focused on our own issues — financial hardships, health issues, marital problems, etc. — that we forget that there are others who are suffering too. When we consciously choose to use our time and resources to help others, joy is always the reward.
It sometimes feels like it is so hard to avoid feeling down or depressed these days. Between the sad news coming from world headlines, the impact of the ongoing raging pandemic, and the constant negative messages popping up on social and traditional media, it sometimes feels like the entire world is pulling you down. What do you do to feel happiness and joy during these troubled and turbulent times? In this interview series called “Finding Happiness and Joy During Turbulent Times” we are talking to experts, authors, and mental health professionals who share lessons from their research or experience about “How To Find Happiness and Joy During Troubled & Turbulent Times”.
As a part of this series, I had the pleasure of interviewing Jessica Landmon.
Jessica Landmon is an ordained pastor known for taking deep spiritual matters and presenting them in a simple, practical way. She is the founder of Women Get Real Ministries — a ministry dedicated to helping set all women free from the bondage of fear, while at the same time encouraging them to find their calling and boldly walk in it. Jessica is the author of two books, including her recent release of She Who Dwells: Overcoming Fear and Finding Peace, which is a verse-by-verse study of Psalm 91 equipping women to live lives of faith, peace, and joy.
Thank you so much for joining us in this interview series! Before we dive into the main focus of our interview, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you tell us a bit about your childhood backstory?
I grew up in a small town in Connecticut. I had a traditional childhood, living with both my parents and my older brother. Church and serving God were an integral part of my upbringing. My parents taught me the importance of faith and prayer, and I lived out what I knew. When I was little, maybe as young as five or six years old, I would line up my stuffed animals in a circle next to me before bed, and together we would have prayer time. We would pray for my family, my friends, and anyone else that I heard needed a touch from God. Looking back, I suppose I was destined to be a Pastor.
What or who inspired you to pursue your career? We’d love to hear the story.
Actually, ministry was not a first career for me. In fact, it wasn’t even on my radar. I am a math girl and went to college to pursue a degree in Accounting. I worked a few years in that field, and then transferred over to Human Resources. It was a much better fit for me as I was helping people find their right fit in the workplace. Once my son was born, I decided to stay home full-time. Two years later my daughter was born. In an effort to bring moms together, I started having Bible studies at my house. I saw the impact it was making in these women’s lives, and I couldn’t help but want to do more. I loved helping women grow in their faith, help them discover their God-given talents, and find their purpose. Once my daughter headed to Kindergarten, I went back to school to earn a degree in Biblical Studies and pursued ministry full-time.
None of us can achieve success without some help along the way. Was there a particular person who you feel gave you the most help or encouragement to be who you are today? Can you share a story about that?
As I mentioned early, I grew up with a supportive family who gave me a strong foundational faith in Jesus. I grew up understanding His undeniable love for me and His divine plan for my life. My parents encouraged me to chase my dreams and all that God had for me. But in addition to their guiding hand, I need to give well deserved credit to my husband. We met in high school when I was a cheerleader, and he was a football player. Our long-standing joke is that I’ve been cheering and rooting for him ever since. But the truth is, he has also been cheering and rooting for me. He has always pushed me out of the comfortable and challenged me to take chances and risks. He has stood by me when my ideas seemed too big to even share out loud. When I decided to officially form Women Get Real, the tasks seemed daunting. There were many days, if I’m being honest, where I considered ditching the entire thing and doing something easier. He would not let me settle and run away because it was hard. He has been my rock, my sounding board, and advisor through it all.
Can you share the funniest or most interesting mistake that occurred to you in the course of your career? What lesson or take away did you learn from that?
In the early years of my ministry, I was so zealous and full of ideas that I tried to do everything myself. People offered to help me, but I often turned those offers away because I didn’t want to impose on anyone. As you would imagine, I quickly burned myself out. I failed to accept help because somehow, I thought that it was a sign of weakness. Oh, the contrary! That was such a rookie mistake. I have since learned that we need a community of likeminded people if we want to build something of impact.
What are some of the most interesting or exciting projects you are working on now? How do you think that might help people?
Four years ago, during the pandemic, the world stood still. My ministry was no different. I was no longer allowed to meet with people in person, and we also were not able to put on conferences and retreats. Besides our social media presence, we were very limited in what we could do. So, we pivoted just like the rest of the world and launched an online discipleship school. In its early years, all meetings happened by Zoom and enrollment was low. However, we are now in its fourth year and have grown the program to a place where we must turn people away each year. I am thrilled with the impact we are having as we come alongside other women and help them find their calling. Additionally, I just launched my new book, She Who Dwells: Overcoming Fear and Finding Peace. In this book, I share my struggle with fear and anxiety when I was a young mom, and how by diving deep into scripture, I was able to live the peace-filled life I so richly desired. My hope is that this book encourages other women to not settle for anything less than the peace-filled and joy-filled life that God wants to grant them.
You are a successful leader. Which three character traits do you think were most instrumental to your success? Can you please share a story or example for each?
Having clear vision and administrative gifts are two character traits that have truly helped me succeed in ministry. Many people have a lot of grand ideas but can easily become overwhelmed with the implementation process. Although it’s certainly important to be a visionary and to chase after big ideas, it’s also important to be able to plan and execute upon them. To do that, every year I set aside five days to pray and plan for the upcoming year. This is a time where I can journal and record all the ideas (big and small) that the Lord has put on my heart. But I don’t stop there. I assign timetables and intentional steps to take over the course of the next several years to make these dreams a reality. This has been critical for achieving my goals.
Although it’s often not the first thing that comes to mind when considering a successful leader, the third character trait that has helped me succeed is compassion. You can’t help other people if you don’t have compassion towards them. Everyone has a backstory, and compassion enables me to put myself in someone else’s shoes, understand where they are coming from, and give me the open door to speak into their life. This is true for the people I am working with on my team and the people I am looking to serve. I remember one afternoon in particular when I was coming out of the grocery store. I was in a bit of a hurry. As I was rushing to my car, I noticed there was a woman sitting on a park bench right near the exit. I could tell that something wasn’t right. Instead of ignoring the situation and continuing with my to-do list, I was moved with compassion towards her. I went to see if she was ok. She was not — she was having a full out panic attack. I quickly decided that all the things that I needed to get done could wait as this woman needed someone to sit with her. Listen, we didn’t look the same, dress the same, or even talk the same. It didn’t matter. I just was given an opportunity to love on someone who was having a really bad day, and I took it. We talked and she shared with me the hard things that were going on in her life. I was able to pray with her and help her calm down. Compassion opened up the conversation so that I could help a complete stranger that day. It may not be what comes to mind when success and leadership traits are discussed, but it certainly is the most important.
For the benefit of our readers, can you briefly let us know why you are an authority about the topic of finding joy?
As a young mom, I struggled with some small-scale fear issues — your typical mom stuff. However, after a near traumatic event, this fear escalated into a full spirit of fear and anxiety. I spent many years struggling to be set free. It wasn’t until I learned that the secret to finding peace and joy was trusting God at His word and believing that no matter what came my way, He would walk me through it. That was enough. I learned how to spend time in His presence — and there and only there did I truly experience the joy the scriptures talk about.
Ok, thank you for all of that. Let’s now shift to the main focus of our interview about finding joy. Even before the pandemic hit, the United States was ranked at #19 in the World Happiness Report. Can you share a few reasons why you think the ranking is so low, despite all of the privileges and opportunities that we have in the US?
This past summer, I had the incredible opportunity to travel to Malawi with charity: water, an organization that brings clean drinking water to impoverished nations in Africa and Asia. While there, we visited some of the poorest communities that I have ever witnessed. But what stood out the most to me was not their lack of resources, their primitive living conditions, or the torn and tattered clothes that they wore on their back. Rather, it was the smiles that graced their faces from the youngest villagers all the way to the oldest. These smiles radiated an inner joy that was not contingent on circumstances. And that’s where we fail in the United States. We have decided that joy is based on things and accomplishments, not a heart of gratitude for this beautiful life that we get to live. The people from Malawi understood how precious life is.
I also firmly believe that the recent growth and use of social media platforms has only made thing worse, exposing us to an unlimited barrage of opinions of how we are to think, feel, look, dress, and even decorate our homes. With these unrealistic expectations as our benchmark, many people fall into a negative pattern of thinking about themselves and where they fall short, which ultimately steals their joy. Comparison truly is the thief of joy.
Lastly, I would add that the exposure to the 24-hour news cycle often fills us with anxiety and negativity over current events, many of which have no personal effect on us whatsoever.
What are the main myths or misconceptions you’d like to dispel about finding joy and happiness? Can you please share some stories or examples?
First off, I’d like to dispel the myth that happiness and joy are the same thing. They are not. Happiness is a temporary emotion because of something that has happened to you. It’s situational if you will. Spending time with my family makes me happy, eating a scrumptious meal makes me happy, walking the beach makes me happy, and even finding a deal at TJ Maxx makes me happy. But those feelings and emotions are fleeting. We certainly should fill our lives with things that make us happy, but we need to recognize that life is also full of situations and trials that will cause the opposite effect. This is when joy comes in. Unlike happiness, joy is not a feeling that is just based on our circumstances. Joy is having an inner peace even when the storms of life come rolling in. It’s knowing that even in the hardest of days, God will use it all for our good. I have had my fair share of trials. About ten years ago, I was diagnosed with two autoimmune diseases. My health was challenged greatly, and the quality of my daily life was impacted. It took me a couple of years with different doctors and regimens to get me feeling well again. But in the middle of this trying season, my joy never waned. I knew that God was in it, and I experienced His Divine peace and joy throughout it all.
In a related, but slightly different question, what are the main mistakes you have seen people make when they try to find happiness? Can you please share some stories or examples?
Honestly, I think people try too hard to find happiness. This exercise, in and of itself, creates more pressure and stress causing the complete opposite result. “If I could just make it to retirement” or “if I just made more money” or “if I could find a partner to spend the rest of my life with, then I will be happy.” I hear these types of comments all the time, and it’s frustrating. I think it’s important to be content in every season that you are in. Each season brings its own pockets of happiness. We just need to look for them.
Fantastic. Here is the main question of our discussion. Can you please share with our readers your “5 things you need to live with more Joie De Vivre, more joy and happiness in life, particularly during turbulent times?” (Please share a story or an example for each.)
As I mentioned earlier, life is full of ups and downs. We can be certain of this truth, but we must not let these circumstances steal our joy. We must protect it at all costs. Here is my list of steps we can implement in our lives to live a life of joy.
- Have a heart of gratitude. There is such an entitled, ungrateful sentiment permeating our country. People tend to focus on all the negative things going on in their life, rather than all the blessings that God has given them. It is so easy to get caught in this trap, but we need to resist it. Each night, when my kids were little, I would make them share with me three things that they were grateful for that day. It could be something big or something little. I didn’t care how hard their days were, I wanted them to end each day with a grateful heart. Honestly, I think people of all ages should implement this routine. I promise you, no matter how hard things get, there is always something to be thankful for.
- Turn your eyes off your situation and help someone else. We get so hyper focused on our own issues — financial hardships, health issues, marital problems, etc. — that we forget that there are others who are suffering too. When we consciously choose to use our time and resources to help others, joy is always the reward.
- When the storms of life roll in, we need to remember that we are not alone. We don’t have to, but we get to, call out to the Lord for help. He is waiting with open arms to move in our lives. There is something so powerful about unburdening your heart before Him. You are seen. You are loved. You are heard. He cares about all the things that are troubling you, and He wants to give you peace and fill your heart with joy.
- Don’t isolate yourself. It is so easy to pull away from people when you are struggling. We weren’t designed to walk this life alone. We need each other. We need community. I think we all learned during the pandemic how isolation was a joy killer. Find your people.
- Remember that this turbulent time in your life is just one season. This too will pass. There is such joy in knowing that we were created on purpose with a purpose to fulfill. And even in the hard seasons, God can use it all for your good. Scripture says in Psalm 139:16, “All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.” The author of your life is creating a beautiful masterpiece. This is just one chapter.
What can concerned friends, colleagues, and life partners do to effectively help support someone they care about who is feeling down or depressed?
First off, we need to recognize that feeling down or depressed from time to time is normal. Often, just spending time with the people we love, sharing an encouraging word, or just listening is all that is needed to help boost their mood. However, there are many instances where helping the people we love is outside of our ability, and we should encourage them to seek professional help. Unfortunately, there is still a stigma associated with counseling and therapy, which frankly I feel is ridiculous in this day and age. There is no shame in seeking mental health support, and the people close to those struggling need to emphasize just that. But in either instance, prayer is the best thing we can provide. Instead of trying to “fix them,” we can get down on our knees and pray that they experience peace.
Ok, we are nearly done. You are a person of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good for the greatest number of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger.
As I stated earlier, discipleship/mentorship is very important to me. This was very near to the heart and mission of Jesus, and I think it should be important to us too. We were not created to walk this life alone. I think everyone should have someone in their life to come along side them to encourage, challenge, and help them find their way. If we each would just commit to finding two people to love and support in this manner, what a difference we would see in the world.
We are very blessed that some of the biggest names in Business, VC funding, Sports, and Entertainment read this column. Is there a person in the world, or in the US, whom you would love to have a private breakfast or lunch with, and why? He or she might just see this, especially if we both tag them 😊
A lot of people don’t know this, but I am a huge Formula One fan. My son introduced it to me last season, and I am kind of obsessed. With that said, I would love to have lunch with Lewis Hamilton. Being a seven-time world champion, watching his transformation from when he started racing to now, and seeing his deep desire to make an impact on those around him just intrigues me. I believe he has been given a platform for a purpose, and I am extremely interested to see how he can continue to use it for good.
How can our readers further follow your work online?
Readers can visit womengetreal.org to read my blogs, connect to the Women Get Real Podcast, and stay up to date on upcoming events. They can also follow us on Facebook @womengetreal and Instagram @womengetrealministries. I’d love for them to pick up a copy of She Who Dwells: Overcoming Fear and Finding Peace. It’s available on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Walmart and some of your favorite local bookstores.
Thank you for these really excellent insights, and we greatly appreciate the time you spent with this. We wish you continued success and good health!
Pastor Jessica Landmon Of Women Get Real Ministries On Finding Happiness and Joy During Turbulent… was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.