An Interview With Eden Gold
The And Ministry — This is something I created called The And Ministry. It’s based on the belief that I can be grateful and in pain at the same time. I can be struggling and looking forward to what’s next. The “and” allows me not to stay stuck in the negativity of the moment.
As a part of our series about Mental Health Champions helping to promote mental wellness, I had the pleasure to interview Dr. Kristen Guillory.
Dr. Kristen Guillory is an international speaker, author, coach, and mental health professional known for her heart-centered approach that blends humor, storytelling, and transparency. Earning her Ph.D. at 27, she became the only African American woman in her graduating class to do so. With over 1,500 talks delivered to more than 500,000 people, Dr. Guillory empowers individuals to embrace their authentic selves and find true freedom. Featured on NBC, Fox, CBS affiliates, and in Forbes, she is also the author of “Walking Through the Fog” and “Look, Stop Hiding.” As the founder of Candid Conversations for Men, she creates transformative spaces for healing and growth. Now residing in South Florida, Dr. Guillory continues to inspire others to live fully and freely.
Thank you so much for doing this with us! Before we dig in, our readers would like to get to know you a bit. Can you tell us a bit about how you grew up?
I grew up in Texas in a loving household where storytelling, service, and laughter were part of our daily rhythm. My parents were incredibly nurturing, and my upbringing was rooted in community — church, family, and connection. From a young age, I was drawn to understanding people’s hearts, even if I didn’t yet know how that would shape my life’s work. I am the oldest of three and grew up in a suburb of Dallas called DeSoto. Many people called our family “The Cosby Family.” There was fun, there were vacations, and education and church were important to us. My grandmother instilled in me the importance of education and giving back. My parents divorced when I was 15. I was in the band and loved it! I’ve always been someone who wanted to help others. I began standing up for people as early as the 7th grade.
You are currently leading an initiative that is helping to promote mental wellness. Can you tell us a bit more specifically about what you are trying to address?
I’m focused on redefining mental health through a culturally grounded, holistic lens — especially for Black men and women of color. My work centers joy, rest, freedom, and authenticity as critical parts of wellness. I help people — particularly those who are used to being “the strong one” — unlearn harmful beliefs around shame, silence, and over-functioning. Through retreats, talks, and coaching, I create spaces where people can feel seen, held, and healed.
Can you tell us the backstory about what inspired you to originally feel passionate about this cause?
As a former professor of counseling and social work, I saw firsthand how my students were juggling full plates — being students, working, parenting — and more. At the same time, I wasn’t prioritizing my own mental wellness. I never truly rested for many years.
There were three major moments that changed that:
- Watching some of the women I mentored become physically ill because they were trying to be like me. What they didn’t consider was that I had a different capacity to produce — and I wasn’t carrying what they were. One was a caregiver for her mother, and another was in a difficult romantic relationship.
- The biggest turning point came in March of 2013, when my nephew Chase passed away. Anyone who knows me knows how much I love being an aunt — and I couldn’t fix it. As the oldest, I’m used to fixing things. But I couldn’t fix this. I was forced to be still, to grieve, and to feel deeply. Yet I didn’t give myself that time, because I didn’t think I had the right to grieve. I just wanted to save everyone else.
- Over time, I began to see how essential rest truly is. It’s one thing to lead large trainings on rest — it’s another to embody it. And I do that today. Rest, to me, also means walking in freedom and not hiding.
After working with thousands of incredible people, I realized a common thread: 99% of them were hiding some part of their gift. That realization led me to write my book: Look, Stop Hiding: How to Find Your Voice and Never Dim Your Light Again.
I came to understand the need for support that honors our lived experiences. But my real turning point came after facing my own burnout. I realized I had been carrying everyone else’s weight while denying myself the very healing I offered others. That led me to step away from academia and commit to work that embraces soul-level healing — not just clinical diagnoses.
Many of us have ideas, dreams, and passions, but never manifest them. They don’t get up and just do it. But you did. Was there an “Aha Moment” that made you decide that you were actually going to step up and do it? What was that final trigger?
I’ve always been someone who got up and took action. In the 4th grade, I noticed my school didn’t recognize Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.’s birthday — even though it was January 15. I went to the principal’s office to say something, and by the end of the day, they announced it over the intercom. From there, I went on to start organizations in college and constantly looked for ways to give back. It’s always been in me to move — I never needed permission from anyone.
But as I got older, I sometimes played it safe. I’ve had a few “aha” moments that reminded me to walk fully in my gifts.
One of them happened on the first day of my very first semester as a professor. I played my customized theme song — a hip-hop track titled You Will Never Find Another. The students loved it. But the next semester, I didn’t play it. To my surprise, a student raised her hand and asked about the song. I told her I had stopped because no other professor had a theme song, and I was afraid of falling into a stereotype — the young Black professor playing hip-hop. She responded, “Dr. Guillory, that song and you were what everyone was talking about.” That moment reminded me of the power of showing up as my full self.
Another moment came when I was reading feedback from an event I led at a university. I was scanning the comments, looking for a good quote for my website, when I paused and thought, Oh my goodness, I’ve taken this gift for granted.The feedback included statements like: “She changed my life,” “I’m a better person because of her,” and “This was my favorite event of the year.” I hadn’t realized my gift was extraordinary. That moment made me pause.
When I felt led by the Lord to walk away from my professor position in August 2014, I hesitated. I never aspired to be a business owner — I liked steady income. I was afraid: afraid of what people would think, afraid of the unknown. But after many confirmations, I took the leap — and left.
Can you share the most interesting story that happened to you since you began leading your company or organization?
Wow, there are so many stories — I don’t know if I have a most interesting one, but I can share an especially meaningful one.
At the end of one of my Candid Conversations for Men events, one of my volunteers came and stood next to me and said, “Dr. Guillory, do you see this?” I said, “What?” He replied, “There’s a room full of men — talking, not leaving, no sports on, no alcohol. I’ve never seen this before.”
Another man at that same event said, “We don’t know what you do to us, but it’s like you have magic pixie dust — we just do whatever you say. I’ve never been in a space like this for men and felt this safe.”
And from that same event, a woman connected to one of the attendees reached out to me and said, “Your event saved his life. He was in a dark place and was considering harming himself. He’s a different person today.”
Another woman messaged me and introduced herself the day after her husband passed away. She thanked me for allowing her husband to be free. She said he had hidden parts of himself and was boxed in his whole life — but when he came back from my event, he was different. His soul had awakened.
I was taken aback by that message — by all of them.
At one of my Candid Conversations for Men sessions, a gentleman stood up and tearfully said, “I didn’t know I needed this. I didn’t know it was okay to feel.” That moment — watching a room full of Black men hold space for each other in vulnerability — will stay with me forever. It reminded me that healing isn’t just personal; it’s collective.22
None of us can be successful without some help along the way. Did you have mentors or cheerleaders who helped you to succeed? Can you tell us a story about their influence?
Of course, my mom has been my biggest cheerleader and supporter. She has attended at least 65% of my events — and that’s a lot. She has served at nearly every retreat or bootcamp I’ve hosted, and she’s also helped me financially. My family is very supportive of me — my sister, brother, aunt, dad, and others.
Dr. Shirly Kind was my mentor from 2002 to 2007, and I learned and gleaned so much from her. Shyra Smith was the first coach I ever worked with in 2009, and we recently reconnected. They saw in me what I hadn’t yet seen in myself.
I’ve had amazing coaches and friends who have believed in me from the very beginning.
According to Mental Health America’s report, over 44 million Americans have a mental health condition. Yet there’s still a stigma about mental illness. Can you share a few reasons you think this is so?
Stigma often stems from silence and shame. In many communities, we’ve been conditioned to believe that vulnerability equals weakness. We’ve also been historically underserved or misunderstood by the mental health field. When people don’t see themselves reflected in their therapists or in language that resonates, it only deepens feelings of disconnection and mistrust.
There’s also the harmful idea that seeking help means something is wrong with you. But getting a diagnosis — like anxiety, for example — doesn’t mean you’re broken. It simply helps you understand why you function and think the way you do, so you can begin to take meaningful steps toward healing.
So many people are struggling and judging themselves, not realizing that willpower alone isn’t what’s needed. There is power in awareness — and freedom in doing something with that awareness.
In your experience, what should a) individuals b) society, and c) the government do to better support people suffering from mental illness?
a) Individuals:
We need to truly see one another. After traveling to 20 countries in 2024, the #1 theme I observed was that people deeply appreciate being seen and heard. It’s also important to stand in the gap and say something when something feels off. If you sense that someone is struggling, say: “I see you. It seems like you’re going through a lot. I’m here. How can I help?” Depending on the relationship, it might mean suggesting counseling, reassuring them that it’s okay to get help, or encouraging them to take a break.
b) Society:
We must normalize diverse expressions of wellness and actively challenge toxic productivity culture. This includes adding more wellness breaks into the workday, encouraging rest for children who are often overwhelmed, and making check-ups for mental health as routine and accepted as physical health appointments.
c) Government:
There should be increased funding for long-term wellness initiatives. Additionally, governments should integrate wellness moments into the standard workweek and workday, making mental and emotional well-being a national priority.
What are your 5 strategies you use to promote your own well-being and mental wellness? If you can, please give a story or example for each.
The And Ministry — This is something I created called The And Ministry. It’s based on the belief that I can be grateful and in pain at the same time. I can be struggling and looking forward to what’s next. The “and” allows me not to stay stuck in the negativity of the moment.
For example:
“Oh, there’s traffic and I’m grateful I have a car.”
“It’s raining and I’m grateful for the nourishment it brings.”
The “and” helps me keep going. It has been incredibly helpful for my mental health. I can be frustrated and grateful at the same time. I can be confused and trust the Lord at the same time.
Replace “I Have To” With “I Get To” This simple shift helps cultivate gratitude and can be used at any moment. I remember being in Atlanta visiting my family. We went to Walmart, and when we got home, I realized I had left my wallet in the cart. As I drove back to Walmart, I kept repeating out loud: I get to go back to Walmart. Why? Because that statement helped reduce my frustration. If I “get” to go back to Walmart, that means:
- I have a car to drive
- I have the ability to drive
- I’m going back to retrieve a wallet and a phone
- And if they’re not there, I have the means to cancel cards or get a new phone
It helped shift my focus to gratitude, even though I still had every right to be frustrated.
No Morning Meetings and I Don’t Fill My Day With Work — I thrive after 10 a.m. and know my best working hours. Of course, I’ll take a morning meeting if necessary. But when people say, “Oh, Dr. Guillory, you don’t have any morning slots available,” I respond, “No, they’re not available.” I know when I thrive: from about 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., then I take a break, and I’m good again in the evening. I’m very aware of my energy and capacity, and I always want to show up as my best self — because that’s what my gift requires and what the people I work with deserve.
Alone Time — I am an Empath, Highly Sensitive, and an Introvert — I love being alone — to reflect, decompress, and just be. People are often surprised by that, especially because I genuinely love people and love what I do. But because my work is so people-centered, and because I’m an empath, a highly sensitive person, and an introvert, solitude restores me. Being by myself — by the ocean, in nature, or in the mountains — does wonders for me. And I make sure to do it often.
Letting My Loved Ones Know What I Need — As someone who’s an empath and highly sensitive, my rest looks different. And it can vary depending on the season I’m in. My family and friends know that I don’t enjoy crowds or being around a lot of people when I’m resting.
For example, my mom once asked, “Hey, do you want it to just be us for your birthday, or are you open to others joining?” That simple question meant a lot, because she understands my capacity.
Even my clients know this about me. One client was visiting town and wanted to get a group of us together. Another client said, “I think she’s in town, but she may not want to go to a crowded restaurant.”
That kind of awareness and respect means everything.
What are your favorite books, podcasts, or resources that inspire you to be a mental health champion?
- Joy in the Mourning by Danielle Anderson
- My sister Danielle Anderson — Doula, Somatic Healer, Nervous System Educator — She’s been the main resource that has taken my wellness to the next level. Check her out at wellwithdanielle.net
If you could tell other people one thing about why they should consider making a positive impact on our environment or society, like you, what would you tell them?
Because someone is waiting for your courage. Every time you show up authentically, take a step toward healing, or create something rooted in love — you make it safer for someone else to do the same. That ripple effect is powerful.
How can our readers follow you online?
You can find me at www.kristenguillory.com, and follow me on Instagram @drkristenguillory. You can also learn more about my retreats, coaching, including my coaching certification courses there.
This was very meaningful, thank you so much. We wish you only continued success on your great work!
Mental Health Champions: Why & How Dr Kristen Guillory Is Helping To Champion Mental Wellness was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.