An Interview With Cynthia Corsetti
Empathy enables better work life integration: In a study by Catalyst, 86% of employees with an empathetic leader can better balance the demands of their work and personal lives vs only 60% of those who did not have an empathetic leader. You want to have employees who are at the top of their game and not overstressed and distracted.
Empathy, the ability to understand and share the feelings of another, is increasingly recognized as a pivotal leadership trait. In an ever-evolving business landscape, leaders who exhibit genuine empathy are better equipped to connect, inspire, and drive their teams towards success. But how exactly does empathy shape leadership dynamics? How can it be harnessed to foster stronger relationships, improved decision-making, and a more inclusive work environment? As part of this series, we had the pleasure of interviewing Maria Ross.
Maria Ross, founder of Red Slice is a speaker, facilitator, author, strategist, and empathy advocate who believes cash flow, creativity, and compassion are not mutually exclusive. She’s spent decades helping forward-thinking leaders, teams, and brands connect and engage through empathy to accelerate growth. Maria also hosts the top-rated The Empathy Edge podcast, speaking with leaders, changemakers, authors, and activists on how to achieve radical success through empathy. Her newest book, The Empathy Dilemma: How Successful Leaders Balance Performance, People, and Personal Boundaries releases September 5.
Thank you so much for joining us in this interview series. Before we dive into our discussion about empathy, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you share with us the backstory about what brought you to your specific career path?
I started out in change management consulting before getting back into my love of marketing and branding. I built my career on both the client and agency sides, understanding the importance of empathy to connect and engage with your ideal audience. After a decade in tech marketing specifically, I started my own business, Red Slice, to help mission-driven clients ranging from solopreneurs to large tech companies craft a clear and compelling story to inspire and engage the right people and grow their impact.
In 2019, I released my 4th published book, The Empathy Edge, to make the business case for empathy as a strategic advantage for leaders, brands, and teams. The success of that book to start an empathy movement at work, combined with the pandemic, led me to now mostly focus on helping forward-thinking leaders and brands strengthen their empathy, apply it to their work, and achieve radical success. That has led to my next book, The Empathy Dilemma: How Successful Leaders Balance Performance, People, and Personal Boundaries, which just released this September.
Can you share the most interesting story that happened to you since you started your career?
I was fortunate in my 20’s to work in management consulting, where I got to be in the room with experienced C-suite execs. As part of that role, I marketed events for The Discovery Channel and Animal Planets that sometimes included live pythons. I also lived through the tech boom (and bust) of the early 2000’s. But probably the most interesting experience is that I survived a near-fatal brain aneurysm right when I launched my own business, had a miraculous recovery, and slowly built my business back up to where it is today!
What do you think makes your company stand out? Can you share a story?
My unique approach to marrying emotional connection with bottom-line business results helps my business stand out. Whether I’m crafting powerful brand messaging or conducting a leadership workshop on how to leverage empathy to boost engagement and performance, I show my clients that when they focus on the PEOPLE first and truly understand and listen to them, the results will follow. A great brand starts from the inside out, from the leaders and the culture first. And I’m not afraid to give tough love to help them get to success!
One tech company I worked with was having a hard time articulating their mission in a workshop.They couldn’t see beyond the fact that they sold software and wanted to make money. They really just didn’t have empathy for their customers. We were going around and around. Finally, I threw my papers down on the desk, stepped away from the projector, and said, “Why are you all here?! What makes you choose this company of all companies to earn your living?! “Everyone got quiet and the CEO directly said how their technology helps communities thrive and ensures families can thrive, too.
Instantly, the mood changed. They got excited. They shouted yes! They had tapped into the aspirations and goals of their customers. Months later, that CEO thanked me not just for their successful marketing rebrand, but said, “This work changed the way we talk to each other.” When branding or business is soulless, robotic, or cookie-cutter, you cannot understand your audience enough to see things from their point of view. Power brands and legendary leaders understand this. You have to start with people.To ensure your business thrives, it’s essential to get to know, inspire, and listen to the people who matter most.
You are a successful business leader. Which three character traits do you think were most instrumental to your success? Can you please share a story or example for each?
- Enthusiasm and Practicality In many workshops, there is always a skeptic. Someone who has their arms crossed and isn’t sure why they are even there. Through my ability to address both the practical and inspirational, they become my biggest champion. I am good at winning people over by intentionally listening to them.
- Ability to connect the dots and elevate the unseen: In keynotes or workshops, I can see the connections and elevate the big idea that they may have overlooked. This has happened time and again when clients think some aspect of their work is throwaway or unimportant. I’m able to show them the secret to their success.
- Empathy: When I worked as a marketer in tech, I sought out the sales engineers and programmers to truly understand the product and what they had built and how it could transform things for our customers. Even though some of them didn’t understand marketing, they supported me, because I took the time to understand them and value their work and perspective. It made me more effective as a marketer — and more credible.
Ok, thank you for that. Let’s now jump to the primary focus of our interview. Let’s begin with a basic definition so that all of us are on the same page. How do you define empathy in a leadership context, and why do you believe it’s a vital trait for leaders to possess in today’s work environment?
Empathy is the ability to see, understand, and — where appropriate — feel another person’s perspective. Then, furthermore, using that information to act with compassion. In business and leadership, this doesn’t just mean crying on the floor with your employees. Think of it as information gathering — seeking to understand someone’s context so you can move forward together.
If your team does not think you see, hear, and value them, they will never bring forth their good ideas, go above and beyond, or roll up their sleeves to support the shared mission. They will be too busy living in fear or uncertainty to tap into innovation that could drive the bottom line.
Can you share a personal experience where showing empathy as a leader significantly impacted a situation or relationship in your organization?
Throughout my career, I have leaned unto curiosity to learn more, bring others along, and generate new ideas. That has made me successful. I never called it empathy at the time, but that’s what it was. It helped me make connections, navigate challenges, and get the best work out of colleagues.
My example earlier about working as a tech marketer served me well in being able to gain loyalty, respect, and vital information others might have missed. Earlier in my career, I was able to manage a struggling employee by asking lots of questions, listening to his preferences and, thus, finding the best fit for him within a role he had been struggling in. Because he knew I had his back and would listen, he was open to feedback and advice and improved his performance dramatically where others had given up on him.
How do empathetic leaders strike a balance between understanding their team’s feelings and making tough decisions that might not be universally popular?
You CAN be empathetic and make tough decisions. We need to understand that empathy is not about caving into unreasonable demands or changing business strategy just because it makes someone unhappy. It’s about inviting and listening to input in the process, thanking people for their feedback and perspective, synthetizing all of that to ensure you don’t miss risks or opportunities — and then communicating clearly back why you made the decision you made and providing the right support so those who are not thrilled by it can find a way to disagree but still commit.
You want to put ego aside, listen attentively, avoid defensiveness, clearly explain how the decision was made and next steps, and ask how people need to be supported. You will get much more buy-in and loyalty for people to then move forward and do their best work.
Too often, leaders either try to please everyone and get nowhere (because you can’t) or they simply make proclamations and run away so they don’t have to deal with the discomfort.
My most empathetic boss actually laid off the entire marketing team. This was clearly not a popular decision, but the way he did it showed his empathy.. The manner in which he shared the news, how he listened and gave us space to process, how he thought ahead about what questions we might have and had answers and resources at the ready, and how he supported us in finding other roles was amazing. The decision was made for business reasons. It was tough. But he stayed present, open, and curious so that we felt supported. That’s empathetic leadership. Because of this, he is still a close mentor to this day.
How would you differentiate between empathy and sympathy in leadership? Why is it important for leaders to distinguish between the two?
Sympathy usually implies you are looking AT someone from a distance and pitying them in some way, usually due to misfortune. It immediately puts you on different levels. Empathy is about being WITH someone. Trying to sit on the same side of the table with them, and seeing what they see.
Sympathy implies a victim. Empathy builds a partnership. If you can’t understand the difference you not only risk patronizing someone, but you lose out on the exponential power that a connection can bring new ideas and renewed enthusiasm. Empathy ensures you don’t overlook risks or miss out on opportunities that another person’s perspective might better reveal.
What are some practical strategies or exercises that leaders can employ to cultivate and enhance their empathetic skills?
- Practice self-awareness: You have to start with YOU and clear out the noise in your own head before you can make room for someone else’s perspective without defensiveness or fear. Take a diagnostic self-assessment, such as Enneagram or Clifton Strengthsfinder to uncover your strengths, blind spots, and triggers. Own what you bring into the interaction and be present enough to take a beat and respond rather than react.
- Engage in self-care: Self-care is not selfish and it goes beyond massages and mani/pedis. It’s about ensuring you are operating at peak capacity so you can show empathy. We all know when we’re hungry or tired, we can get very short-tempered. Self-care ensures we are fully engaging our prefrontal cortex and cognitive skills to have patience to listen, strength to hear another perspective, and capacity to show compassion. If you’re operating from an empty tank, you go into self-preservation and empathy for others takes a backseat. What recharges you, inspires you, fuels you? Make time for it. It matters.
How can empathy help leaders navigate the complexities of leading diverse teams and ensure inclusivity?
Diversity is good for business. We get multiple points of view and can tap into unseen opportunities or avoid hidden risks because the team can look at a challenge from multiple angles. Empathy is the fuel that enables DEIB initiatives to actually work.
If we can’t change our mindset to see, understand, and listen to other perspectives and life experiences, our business can’t gain the benefits of diverse viewpoints. We don’t want to just have a bunch of people sitting around a table who can’t get along or understand each other. Empathy is the key to unlocking new ideas, talent, and perspectives that benefit the business.
Based on your experience and research, can you please share “5 Ways Empathy Will Affect Your Leadership”?
- Empathy builds employee loyalty. Research shows that the majority of employees will work longer hours and sometimes, for less pay, if they are working for an empathetic manager or team who they know sees, hears, and understands them.
- Empathy increases customer value and loyalty: In research from both https://www.ipsos.com/en-us/news-polls/pepsico-empathy-051420 86% of customers say empathy is the biggest driver of loyalty and 97% of customers say empathy is the most important element in customer engagement. With empathetic leaders, front line workers and customer service reps can feel supported enough to then show that empathy to their customers.
- Empathy enables better work life integration: In a study by Catalyst, 86% of employees with an empathetic leader can better balance the demands of their work and personal lives vs only 60% of those who did not have an empathetic leader. You want to have employees who are at the top of their game and not overstressed and distracted.
- Boost innovation and engagement: In the same Catalyst study, workers who had empathetic leaders, 61% vs. 13% said they were able to be more innovative at work than those without empathetic leaders, and 76% vs. 32% were more engaged. Think about the productivity and innovation you lose out on when your leaders are not empathetic.
- Attract and retain top talent: Today’s workforce generations are demanding a new type of workplace culture. One where they feel seen, heard, and valued, and where they can work flexibly. When someone feels the company understands their needs, they are in turn, more motivated to work at their very best. This is defined as empathy.If leaders don’t step up, that talent will go to their competition.
Are there potential pitfalls or challenges associated with being an empathetic leader? How can these be addressed?
The only challenges are if you are practicing something that is not empathy. That’s where leaders claiming to be empathetic get into trouble and also burn themselves out. If they are not addressing performance concerns for fear of hurting feelings, that is avoidance, not empathy. If they are taking on extra work because their people are taking advantage, that is a lack of boundaries, not empathy. If they are changing course or avoiding tough business decisions to make sure everyone is happy, that is people pleasing, not empathy.
Empathy is about seeing things from another person’s perspective, getting curious to find out what is going on, and asking questions to get to the root cause and chart a course forward. It requires great strength to do so without defensiveness or fear. Making everyone happy is not empathy. Supporting and listening to people in the midst of tough decisions so you can still meet your goals is empathy. If someone is not delivering, you don’t lower the bar. You leverage empathy to understand what is going on and what the person needs so they can reach the bar.
You are a person of great influence. If you could start a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger. 🙂
I’m living my movement! The bulk of our workplace — — and world — problems: war, racism, misogyny, inequity, poor customer experience, dysfunctional teams and poor communication all stem from a lack of empathy. There’s a lack of understanding of how our actions impact other people. My movement is to help everyone understand how empathy can be a strategic advantage and it can lead to radical success. And if we can practice at the place we spend the bulk of our time — at work — it will spill over into our personal lives, families, communities, and world.
How can our readers further follow you online?
Thank you! Please visit www.red-slice.com to learn more and sign up for my newsletter for freebies, insights,and inspiration. And tune in to the The Empathy Edge podcast where I talk with leaders and changemakers about all aspects of empathy at www.TheEmpathyEdge.com or your favorite podcast player. Finally, please connect with me (with a note that you saw me here) on LinkedIn at @mariajross or on Instagram or Threads @redslicemaria
Thank you for the time you spent sharing these fantastic insights. We wish you only continued success in your great work!
About the Interviewer: Cynthia Corsetti is an esteemed executive coach with over two decades in corporate leadership and 11 years in executive coaching. Author of the upcoming book, “Dark Drivers,” she guides high-performing professionals and Fortune 500 firms to recognize and manage underlying influences affecting their leadership. Beyond individual coaching, Cynthia offers a 6-month executive transition program and partners with organizations to nurture the next wave of leadership excellence.
Maria Ross of Red Slice: 5 Ways Empathy Will Affect Your Leadership was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.