Keeping In Touch With Your Intuition: Lisa Honig Buksbaum Of Soaringwords On How To Get In Touch With Your Intuition And When To Trust Your Intuition When Making Decisions
An Interview With Maria Angelova
Look for the signs — they are everywhere.
Intuition is defined as the ability to understand something immediately, without the need for conscious reasoning. Where does intuition come from? Can it be trusted? Many lead their lives and make choices based on intuition, or at least keeping in touch with their intuition, and letting it guide them. Some would argue that intuition is not to be relied on for important decisions. Are intuition and common sense related? How can someone tune in to their intuition? As part of this series, we had the pleasure to interview Lisa Honig Buksbaum.
Lisa Honig Buksbaum is an author, social entrepreneur, and passionary, a visionary driven by great passion and action. She is the CEO & Founder of Soaringwords, a global non-profit that has already inspired more than 500,000 people to take active roles in self-healing to experience greater physical, emotional, and mental well-being using practical interventions from the latest discoveries in Positive Psychology. Lisa is president-elect of the International Positive Psychology Association’s Health & Wellbeing Division and leads Soaringwords’ SOARING into Strength Positive Health Initiative which has been shared with thousands of people in Fortune 50 companies, health and human service agencies, and community organizations. She is also the Founder of FlowMotion, a healing imagery practice for individuals and families grappling with illness, setbacks, trauma, or challenges.
Thank you so much for doing this with us! Before we start, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you tell us a bit about your childhood backstory?
I grew up in Fairlawn, New Jersey with my younger brother, Gary and two loving parents. Since I was a child, I have had a strong inner knowingness. I “sensed” things — which I now know is related to being an empath, or someone with a highly refined emotional intelligence (EQ). For example, once when I was in high school, I suddenly got an unsettling feeling about my father. I went to the payphone (what we had in the days before cellphones were invented) and called my mother. “What’s going on with Dad?” I asked. My father was involved in a fender-bender car accident. No one was hurt, but I knew something had happened, even though no one told me. I also knew things which came to fruition years later.
I earned my undergraduate degree at the University of Pennsylvania and then a Master of Business Administration in marketing at Columbia Graduate School of Business. This led me to a wonderful career as a marketer for leading brands at some of the top advertising agencies in the world. I also founded my own award-winning marketing firm, which I ran for 10 years. I was married, the mother of two boys, and enjoyed my life on the Upper West Side. However, a phone call at four o’clock in the morning launched a trifecta of trauma that changed my life forever. Three experiences with death and illness occurred in my family in just 10 months. My beloved brother died suddenly of an asthma-induced heart attack, my father was battling lymphoma, and my oldest son became catastrophically ill. When my family’s world imploded, I felt as if I had become irrevocably damaged. Instead, I discovered my calling during a sunrise walk along the beach at the height of my son’s illness. I heard the word “Soaringwords,” and suddenly knew why I was born. I channeled my passion and resilience into a global movement that would inspire millions of people to never give up. My lifetime of experiences helping others through trauma, grief, illness, and setbacks — combined with my own personal experiences — led me to found Soaringwords, a not-for-profit organization with the mission of inspiring children, families, adults, seniors, and health care professionals to take active roles in self healing to experience greater physical, emotional, and mental well-being. Since 2000, Soaringwords has inspired more than 500,000 people through workshops and pro-social employee-engagement programs. Today, I am an internationally recognized Positive Psychology thought leader and continue sharing these healing interventions through the SOARING into Strength Positive Health Initiative, my healing imagery practice, and my recently published memoir SOARING into Strength: Love Transcends Pain.
Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote”? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your life?
“The purpose of life is to lead a life of purpose.” As we mature and experience more of life, we get to know ourselves in deeper, more integrated ways. As this happens, our internal voice — our knowingness — gets stronger. This gives us the opportunity to live our best possible life, which reminds me of the powerful adage by Rabbi Hillel: “If I am not for myself, who will be for me? If I am only for myself, what am I? And if not now, when?”
Is there a particular book, podcast, or film that made a significant impact on you as you cultivated your intuition? Can you share a story or explain why it resonated with you so much?
When it comes to the topic of intuition, there are several books that have deepened my awareness, appreciation, and practice as a powerful guiding force in my life. These include Joseph Jaworski’s Synchronicity: The Inner Path of Leadership, which documents when his collision with intuition transformed his life from being a hard-charging, alpha-CEO to becoming a leader with tremendous empathy and authentic reciprocal relationships.
I also loved reading Chris Mackey’s The Positive Psychology of Synchronicity, which explains the science behind intuition, coincidence and synchronicity when we are led by our internal GPS. For three years, I had the privilege of studying with Dr. Gerald Epstein, Founder of the American Academy of Mental Imagery (AIMI). Jerry’s books Healing Visualizations: Creating Health Through Imagery; and Healing Into Immortality: A New Spiritual Medicine of Healing Stories and Imagery are inspiring and useful for anyone looking to access clarity, balance, and calm — especially when moving through different life stages. Jerry’s teachings helped me launch my private healing practice where I help individuals, families, and organizations get in touch with their intuition and inner knowledge to lead authentically or to move through creative barriers or conflicts.
Let’s now shift to the main part of our discussion. Let’s begin with a definition of terms so that each of us and our readers are on the same page. What exactly does intuition mean? Can you explain?
I think about intuition as an internal GPS that is always available to us when we take a moment to pay attention and heed the call. Intuition is experienced by different people in many unique ways. There’s no correct way to do it. You’ll be interested to note that people can strengthen their intuition by simply being aware of it — which means noticing intuitive messages or feelings. Then it’s important to respect these messages and pay attention to them to see how they come to fruition. Just like doing repetitions on an exercise machine in the gym, the more you work at it, the stronger your intuition muscle will become. Intuition can be experienced in many different ways. Some people are kinesthetic; they feel intuitive messages or impulses in their body. Hence the expression, “I have a gut feeling.” While, at other times, people can experience intuition as a physical, tingling sensation that can stop us in our tracks. Some people have a highly defined emotional intelligence and they can read people, situations, and energy. This is also a way in which people harness intuition and allow it to grow stronger with experience.
How would you define common sense? Are intuition and common sense related? How are they different from each other?
Throughout each day and during the course of our lives, we are given many opportunities to learn and grow and become the best version of ourselves. Common sense is defined as having good sense and sound judgment in practical matters, which naturally is an important skill to cultivate. I define Intuition as a way to navigate through life using more of your awareness by open to conscious and unconscious knowledge. Our intuition is a powerful wellspring of insight and guidance that is always ready to support us along the way. When we can incorporate other senses beyond our intellect and pragmatic consciousness, we can access more information which often is not presented in a literal or linear way, however intuitive messages are no less significant or impactful.
What are the positive aspects of being in touch with your intuition? Can you give a story or example to explain what you mean?
Here is a story about how synchronicity and intuition led me to literally stumble into the field of Positive Psychology, which is the foundation of my work with Soaring words. It happened one stormy afternoon at Barnes & Noble on the Upper West Side of New York City. As I rode up the escalator to check out any new arrivals, I glanced down at the main floor where I saw a book that was flashing with a bright light. My intuition immediately began shouting at me to pay attention. I quickly went back down the escalator to investigate and was intrigued by what this synchronistic encounter meant. The book was Flourish by Dr. Martin Seligman, a famous professor and researcher who taught at the University of Pennsylvania when I was an undergraduate student, twenty-eight years earlier. Over the next twenty-four hours, I devoured the entire book. By the time I was done, I decided to apply for the Master of Applied Positive Psychology program at UPenn, founded by Dr. Seligman. Through reading the book, I also discovered he was not only an author, professor, and researcher but was also the founder of the field of Positive Psychology. I was accepted into the program and began studying with many world experts in the field. My capstone thesis was an empirical study measuring the impact of Soaringwords’ interventions on the well-being of hospitalized children. As the months of research progressed, the results were unanimous: 100 percent of the patients experienced significant increases in well-being. My team and I had been witnessing for the past eleven years how our Soaringwords programs were positively impacting the lives of hospitalized children, families, and health professionals. With this research, we could now quantify the success of our programs and show the validity of the healing power behind what we were offering. This was made possible because I had kept myself “open to being open,” trusted and respected my intuition, and followed the signs.
Are there negative aspects to being guided by intuition? Can you give a story or example to explain what you mean?
All things should be in equilibrium — not too much or too little. There are negative consequences when people use intuitive messages as a way to prevent them from living their life fully. In my private healing practice, often I’ve seen people get hung up on the timing of these messages. We can’t control if or when the initiative message will come to fruition, so it’s important not to hold that too tightly. On the other extreme, it’s dangerous to overshare intuitive experiences with people who won’t understand or value them. I think everyone would agree that it’s important to respect things that we value whether it’s a family photo, a baby blanket, or a crystal vase. In the same way, when people view initiative messages or signs as a circus sideshow attraction or fodder for an alluring story at a cocktail party, I believe it cheapens the import and impact of the intuitive guidance you have received. So, if you ask ten people their opinions about something, chances are you’ll probably get ten different answers instead of sitting with the messages to understand what they meant to you at this moment in your life. Also, when you share initiative messages with people who disparage these signs, you’ll end up reducing your confidence and diminish your receptivity to being open to receiving future messages and insights. That’s why I recommend you write down the initiative messages and feelings and let them percolate. Then choose a trusted confidant or wise listener to share your experience and your interpretation.
From your experience or perspective, what are some of the common barriers that hold someone back from trusting their intuition?
Many people recount childhood experiences where they were socialized to act or think in adherence to rigid cultural practices, faith traditions, or family dynamics. Often these constraints can stifle a person’s unique, creative way of expressing themselves and experiencing the world. Once you learn how to pay attention to your intuition — which you can always do in the privacy of your own thoughts and experiences — you can become more confident to rely on this innate gift that each person possesses. Oftentimes, people find it helpful to work with a coach or therapist to break away from limiting beliefs in order to learn to live in more authentic, intuitive ways.
Here is the central question of our discussion. What are five ways that someone can be in touch with their intuition?
- Listen to the call.
Throughout our lives, we have the opportunity to experience an epiphany or life-changing encounter. When this happens, I invite you to answer the call. Here is a story that marks an inflection point that changed the trajectory of my life. Oftentimes, the most horrible situations in our lives can collide with the most powerful shifts in our lives. In this liminal space between the highs and the lows, we are transformed. In only ten months, my family endured three experiences with death and illness. My younger brother Gary died at thirty-five from a sudden asthma-induced heart attack, shattering our family with grief. Then, a few weeks later, my father learned that his non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma had come back and he underwent aggressive stem-cell transplantation treatment, which ultimately sent him into remission again. However, ten months after Gary’s death, my 12-year-old son Jonathan became severely ill with Rheumatic Fever. He was twitching and drooling and experienced painful seizures. His neurologist suggested that we rent a house somewhere along the sea and I was grateful that we had the means to do so. Being on the ocean was healing for Jonathan, my husband Jacob, our younger son Joshua, and me as I became a 24/7 caregiver.
Every morning, I would slip out of the house before anyone else was awake to go for a walk along the beach. And that is where one of the most significant moments of my life occurred. The ocean’s majesty and rhythm soothed my body. My negative thoughts were carried away with the current. The sky went from black to gray as if a photograph had been yanked out of the developing solution midstream. Some days, that gray looked like an absence of color. It suited my mood perfectly. On this morning, I started singing to the seagulls, to the sky, and to the heavens. That day, however, as I sang each stanza on the beach, the sky shifted from nothingness to lightness. My steps grew brighter too. The sky spilled out over the ocean for as far as I could see. It was magnificent. It was rejuvenating. Jonathan’s neurologist had been right to recommend that the family move closer to the sea and I felt fortunate that we had the means to do so. The sea air and ocean were healing. I prayed they would wash their healing powers over our son, just like they were doing for me.
Then it happened. Suddenly, the shape of a wave popped into my head. I saw and heard a word: Soaringwords. The word was loud and clear. NOT a lyric from a song. Soaringwords. Soaring. It felt like it sounded: like flying up to the sky, hanging out with the clouds. I had chills and suddenly stopped in my tracks. My entire life flowed out in front of my eyes, like streams of brilliant red taffeta ribbon fluttering in the morning breeze. I could imagine those vulnerable children and downtrodden parents I had seen with Jonathan in the pediatric cardiology and neurology waiting rooms. Suddenly I had a knowingness, a feeling, that I was supposed to teach and guide the children and families to connect with an inner strength that could help them endure impossibly difficult situations.
I understood that everything in my life had led me to this moment. I could use these things that my family had endured to help others. And although I had enjoyed my career leading me to becoming the president and founder of an award-winning marketing communications company, as I stood gazing out at the vast ocean, I understood that my TRUE mission in life was to help children and families grappling with serious illness.
Soaringwords. THIS was my calling. And, as I stood there on the beach, I took it all in. Then I closed my eyes and I accepted the call.
2. Comforting messages from loved ones.
Just because our loved ones are physically gone, it does not mean that we can’t experience their presence in our lives. After my younger brother Gary died suddenly at only 35 years old, butterflies served as a synchronistic reminder of him that brought comfort in my grief. So, when the Museum of Natural History announced the opening of a butterfly exhibit, I immediately knew I had to take my family. It was a blustery February day in New York City when my husband and I bundled up our two young sons and walked to the museum with anticipation. Because butterflies require warm temperatures, the exhibit was kept safely through multiple doorways that we had to walk through, shedding our Winter layers as we went.
When we reached the exhibit, we gasped in wonder at the lush sanctuary where butterflies darted in all directions around us. Suddenly, an enormous bright blue butterfly careened right into my cheek where it landed. Dozens of children pointed up at me with delight and wonder, and I felt tears of gratitude fill my eyes. Gary had bright blue eyes. This butterfly encounter gave me comfort and hope.
3. Look for the signs — they are everywhere.
Relationships are multi-layered and include many memories and symbols that capture the essence of these precious gifts. This next story illustrates how a symbol can impart powerful initiative messages for you at precisely the time that you need it the most.
A few months after my father’s death, I accepted a major speaking engagement to lead a workshop on SoaringImageryⓇ as part of the Wholebeing Institute’s Well-Being Summit. As I pulled into the parking lot after the four-hour drive from New York City, I found tears running down my cheeks. How am I going to be the teacher? I wondered if I’d make it through a sentence without breaking down. How could I be a workshop leader and healer when I felt so bereft of hope? Suddenly, I saw a bright red flash in my peripheral vision outside the car window. I didn’t even need to look to immediately know what it was: a red cardinal. There was snow everywhere — pure white. The cardinal perched atop a tree stump to the left of my car stood out even more vividly. I recalled the intuitive announcement I had received while sitting beside my father’s bed during his final days: Dad would come to me as a red cardinal. At first, I was perplexed by the message. I didn’t have a personal attachment to this species of bird, having never really noticed cardinals in the wild. However, whenever I get a synchronistic message, I trust that it will come to fruition. So, as I sat in my car outside the conference center, my first red cardinal crossed my path at the precise time I needed that connection. It was an auspicious moment. “Thanks, Dad,” I whispered, “I really needed to hear from you today.”
This cardinal had flown into my life as a personal harbinger to give me confidence. As I walked into the conference, ready to give it my best, I knew I would succeed. Ever since that day, I have repeatedly encountered cardinals. They serve as reminders of my father’s love in moments when I’ve needed him the most.
4. The power of coincidence.
There are many scientific explanations for coincidence and synchronicity based on the laws of physics and psychology. Here is a wonderful story about how I met a dear colleague twice at an auspicious moment in both of our lives.
Just before the world went into quarantine, I was invited to speak at the International Positive Psychology Association (IPPA) World Congress in Melbourne, Australia. On the way, I stopped in Japan, where I had been invited to speak in Kyoto by the founder of a Positive Psychology association. I loved Japan. I found the culture fascinating, and my architect husband and I took our time admiring the majestic pagodas and the calm and tranquil gardens. Even pre-pandemic, donning masks was business-as-usual on the Tokyo subway. In Australia, we spent a few magical days at a resort at the Great Barrier Reef. We stayed in a hut perched on stilts, a short walk to the shore. We spent hours swimming amidst the rainbow-infused coral and iridescent fish of every color imaginable.
A few days later, as I approached the conference center, I wondered if I would see Chris Mackey, an Australian psychologist I had first met walking through the doors of the same conference held six years earlier in Los Angeles. At that time, Chris had told me that he was working on a book about synchronicity. Well acquainted with the subject, I had told him that it was an important guiding principle of my life. Two years later, I received a package from Australia with an autographed copy of Chris’s book including a post-it note marking the page where he wrote about our chance meeting. That morning in Australia, as I walked through the conference center doors surrounded by sixteen hundred people — the largest number of attendees ever — who was the first person I ran into in this sea of people? You guessed it, Chris Mackey.
Chris shouted, “Hey, Lisa! I knew we’d run into each other here, I just didn’t think it would happen so quickly!” Chris handed me an autographed copy of his updated book.
Later, Chris and I co-presented at other scientific conferences and he joined the Soaringwords Advisory Board. He also invited me to join him on the board of the Coincidence Project, a global not-for-profit organization dedicated to educating the public about meaningful coincidences. It encourages individuals to share their stories of coincidence and synchronicity, as well as the meaning that might be attached to them for individual or communal well-being.
5. Take action on coincidence.
When I entered the all-day conference, I grabbed an empty seat at a table that was almost filled. I soon realized that everyone worked at the same company and I felt as if I had stumbled into an internal staff meeting. Another person sat to my right and, after a couple of minutes, recognized a friend of theirs, so they moved to a different table. A few minutes after that, another person sat down and, before they could even say hello, the conference organizers invited them to move to the speaker table. Finally, just moments before the opening session, a third person sat down in the empty seat. She was the director for the health and human services organization that everyone else at the table worked for. It felt like more than a coincidence that the prior occupants had both suddenly moved out to make room for her. We made a powerful and immediate connection and, before the conference was even over, she hired me to lead several Soaringwords SOARING into Strength Positive Health Initiative workshops for the entire department and the city of Jersey City. When coincidence happens, pay attention and take action.
You are a person of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be?
I have been honored to achieve this dream of creating a movement through Soaringwords and the SOARING into Strength Positive Health Initiative. Soaringwords’ mission is to inspire children, families, adults, seniors, and health care professionals to take active roles in self-healing to experience greater physical, emotional, and mental well-being. Our goal is impact — the greatest impact possible. To that end, we have developed a number of powerful programs based on our SOARING into Strength Model which has been presented at 16 scientific conferences around the world. Since 2000, we have reached more than 500,000 people with our SOARING into Strength Positive Health Initiative workshops through partnerships with leading companies, community organizations, not-for-profits, health and human service agencies, municipalities, and patients, families, and healthcare professionals in 196 hospitals around the world. Soaringwords’ accessible, user-friendly platform benefits people at the most vulnerable times in their lives, when they are grappling with a wide range of challenges such as illness, trauma, grief, and the implications of living in a global pandemic. We teach them how to recognize their inherent strengths and to tap into their intuition and inner knowingness in order to experience greater resilience and agency. The SOARING into Strength Positive Health Initiative includes 23 virtual or in-person workshops anchored by empirically valid behavioral exercises with a trauma-informed and person-centered approach to promote dignity, resiliency, and measurably improved well-being. These turn-key initiatives are fueled by the latest scientific findings in Positive Psychology and feature thought leaders who are approachable, likable, credible, and communicate cultural competency and humility. No other organization has amassed such an extensive lineup of internationally recognized positive psychology thought leaders in one comprehensive initiative including Dr. James Pennebaker, expert on positive narrative; Dr. Richard Tedeschi, expert on Post-Traumatic Growth; Dr. Angela Duckworth, expert on resilience; and Dr. Kristin Neff, expert on self-compassion. Leading this initiative gives me the opportunity to continue to learn and grow while making a positive impact on the lives of many.
Is there a person in the world whom you would love to have lunch with, and why? Maybe we can tag them and see what happens!
I would love to have lunch with one of my role models, Florence Nightingale, a visionary who invented many medical breakthroughs. Florence came from a wealthy family and she had the intuition and wisdom to know what was going to be purposeful and meaningful for her life. She signed up to volunteer as a nurse in the Crimean War and saved thousands of lives by implementing hygiene practices such as changing soldiers bandages each day and changing bed linen in order to prevent the spread of infection. At one point, Queen Victoria invited her to live in Buckingham Palace, but she declined and instead focused the rest of her life on writing and enhancing the medical field with her knowledge and tenacity.
How can our readers follow you online?
Linked in: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lisabuksbaum/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Soaringwords
Twitter: https://twitter.com/soaringwords
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/soaringwords/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/Soaringwords
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@soaringwords.org
Thank you for these fantastic insights. We wish you only continued success in your great work!
About The Interviewer: Maria Angelova, MBA is a disruptor, author, motivational speaker, body-mind expert, Pilates teacher and founder and CEO of Rebellious Intl. As a disruptor, Maria is on a mission to change the face of the wellness industry by shifting the self-care mindset for consumers and providers alike. As a mind-body coach, Maria’s superpower is alignment which helps clients create a strong body and a calm mind so they can live a life of freedom, happiness and fulfillment. Prior to founding Rebellious Intl, Maria was a Finance Director and a professional with 17+ years of progressive corporate experience in the Telecommunications, Finance, and Insurance industries. Born in Bulgaria, Maria moved to the United States in 1992. She graduated summa cum laude from both Georgia State University (MBA, Finance) and the University of Georgia (BBA, Finance). Maria’s favorite job is being a mom. Maria enjoys learning, coaching, creating authentic connections, working out, Latin dancing, traveling, and spending time with her tribe. To contact Maria, email her at angelova@rebellious-intl.com. To schedule a free consultation, click here.
Keeping In Touch With Your Intuition: Lisa Honig Buksbaum Of Soaringwords On How To Get In Touch… was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.