As a society, we need to remove the stigma around mental health and learn basic mental wellness techniques that will help ourselves and others. For example, if you know someone that has experienced a major life event, the worst thing you can do is just be silent. Instead try contacting someone and say, “I just wanted you to know I am thinking about you and I care about you.” If that person is struggling or having a bad day, hearing that they matter can make all the difference in the world!
As a part of our series about “Filmmakers Making A Social Impact” I had the pleasure of interviewing Bobbie Dyer.
Bobbie Dyer is the Executive Producer and Co-Creator of the film Breakthrough: A Mental Health Journey. Scheduled for release in 2022, the documentary follows five mental health stories, including her only child Spencer, who struggled with mental health and died in 2019.
With over 30 year’s mortgage banking and real estate experience, Ms. Dyer is currently President of Dyer Mortgage, a boutique mortgage company providing home loans throughout Florida. Dyer has closed over 10,000 loans and is one of the leading home mortgage experts in the country. She has been the recipient of dozens of awards for production, management and leadership. She has over 20 years of experience as a published author and writer of dozens of articles for numerous publications, including USA Today, Brevard Business News, Space Coast Living, Florida Today, Space Coast Business, and industry publications. Ms. Dyer’s column primarily focuses on consumer finance, real estate, and credit. Her 2021 column on men’s golf and The British Open was published worldwide. She has also written more than a dozen articles on food, wine, community involvement and business.
Since 2018, she has served on the Federal Reserve REIN committee (Southeast US/Atlanta Fed) and is a Florida Tech University Trustee. She has received more than 50 awards for community involvement, loan production, customer service, and leadership.
Thank you so much for doing this interview with us! Before we dive in, our readers would love to get to know you a bit. Can you share your “backstory” that brought you to this career?
I grew up in the Boston area as a child and Western Colorado as a teenager. My parents were hard-working people — my mother was an immigrant from the Azore Islands (I’m half Portuguese) and my dad was a first-generation American. His dad was Irish/English and came to America as a young adult from Derbyshire, England. We lived in a trailer for several years and I hated it. We didn’t have much. I was on the free lunch program for years but my parents showed me that ONLY HARD WORK would lead to a better life. I have worked since I was 13 years and never stopped! When I was 19 years old, I got a job as a typist for $5 an hour at a mortgage company. I learned quickly and was promoted in two months. I fell in love with the mortgage business and advanced to a processor, closer, loan officer, and manager (mainly working at Wells Fargo for 18 years). I always wanted to own my own business as I consider myself an entrepreneur. In 2012, I opened my own mortgage company, Dyer Mortgage. Since I had decades of business experience and was successful in a very difficult industry, I felt confident it would be successful and that decision really paid off for me.
How I got into the movie business is due to tragic circumstances. My 28-year-old son Spencer, my only child, died on June 5, 2019, due to mental health issues. I was approached by an up-and-coming director named Josh Painter and he asked me about doing a documentary about my son and myself. I wasn’t interested in that but after many months of friendship, I said I would do it if we included other peoples’ stories that had a positive ending, instead of what happened with my son. Josh and I spent countless hours creating and developing a blueprint for a movie. Then we added Josh Adams and Justin Snyder to the team and formed “Spencer’s Journey Productions, LLC)”. So, I ended up being Executive Producer and Co-creator of a 75-minute documentary titled Breakthrough: A Mental Health Journey. We follow five individual, unique stories and their journeys with mental health and ultimately, mental wellness.
Can you share the funniest or most interesting story that occurred to you in the course of your filmmaking career?
When I started working on this film, I had to learn the industry “lingo.” For example, I heard the director talking about the “B=roll” and I had no idea what he was referring to! I assumed the “B-roll” meant it was lower quality than the “A-roll” or it was like the “B” side of a record. He laughed and quickly corrected me. But I am dating myself by knowing what the B side of a record is!!
Who are some of the most interesting people you have interacted with? What was that like? Do you have any stories? Which people in history inspire you the most? Why?
I have met and/or worked with so many interesting people in my career. One of the benefits of working in the mortgage and real estate industry is you meet people from all walks of life. Many times you develop personal friendships and some of my closest friends began when they were clients.
For historical people that have inspired me, I’d begin with women that fought for equal rights, including the right to own property, vote and equal pay. They overcame incredible odds and took on powerful men so we’d have the rights that we do today.
My VaVao (I’m Portuguese and that’s what we call our grandmothers) immigrated to America from the Azore Islands. She worked in a factory for 60 cents an hour to provide for her family. She made incredible sacrifices so I would have the opportunities that I have been blessed with. Truly inspirational!
But my greatest inspiration is my mother. She immigrated to America when she was seven years old and has worked hard her entire life. She inspired me by showing me anything is possible and never limited me as to what I could do because I was a girl. We didn’t have much (I was on the free lunch program) but she’d still find a way to take care of me. For example, I have very bad vision and had awful thick glasses that made me very self-conscious. When I was 13 years old, she managed to save a couple of dollars a week to buy me contact lenses. That changed my life…. not just because of the contacts but because she knew how much I was struggling and she put me first. Instead of buying herself something, she sacrificed herself to do something for me. I never forgot her literally saving pennies to save up enough money!
Let’s now shift to the main focus of our interview, how are you using your success to bring goodness to the world? Can you share with us the meaningful or exciting social impact causes you are working on right now?
My goal is by showing how regular everyday people got through mental health issues, it will inspire others. They are brave to share their personal stories and I am grateful for their involvement… I say, “It’s not IF you are going to have a mental health issue in your life, IT’S WHEN!” Everyone goes through something in their life and if they are struggling, they should be able to get help without the stigma surrounding mental health. I want to change the narrative and teach others best practices to help themselves and others.
Many of us have ideas, dreams, and passions, but never manifest it. But you did. Was there an “Aha Moment” that made you decide that you were actually going to step up and take action for this cause? What was that final trigger?
Yes. When my only child died in 2019 (my son Spencer) died I had a choice to either let the grief overtake me or I could turn that energy into something positive. He struggled with mental health since he was 10 years old. I decided to take on mental health struggles head-on and ignore the blowback I knew I would get with taking on this issue. I am tired of the stigma, the suffering in silence, and the judgment. I say, “It’s not IF you are going to have a mental health issue in your life, it’s WHEN”. I channeled my energy into making a documentary film Breakthrough: A Mental Health Journey. It will be finished in spring 2022. We spotlight five men and women from all different walks of life and share their stories. My goal is to change the narrative away from the negativity surrounding mental health and transition it to a positive as we work towards MENTAL WELLNESS.
Can you tell us a story about a particular individual who was impacted or helped by your cause?
After my son died, hundreds of people reached out to me for a variety of reasons. But the most impact I saw was when other moms I did not know contacted me and shared their stories and what they were going through. Some had lost their only son too and were having difficulty coping. Other parents had kids going through mental health issues similar to my son and asked for my advice or what they could do. I listened and offered what help I could but felt I should be able to do more. That’s the main reason we are doing the movie-to share experiences, learn best practices, and change how people look at mental health in general.
Are there three things that individuals, society or the government can do to support you in this effort?
Yes. Every individual is going to experience a mental health issue in their lifetime. We can all learn best practices as we strive towards mental wellness. For example, instead of saying “How are you?” try “Tell me how you are doing.” That small change encourages people to open up and if they are struggling, it could help them to know someone cares and will listen to them.
As a society, we need to remove the stigma around mental health and learn basic mental wellness techniques that will help ourselves and others. For example, if you know someone that has experienced a major life event, the worst thing you can do is just be silent. Instead try contacting someone and say, “I just wanted you to know I am thinking about you and I care about you.” If that person is struggling or having a bad day, hearing that they matter can make all the difference in the world!
Finally, as a government, we need more resources for mental health education and treatment, and this includes those struggling with drug addiction. People should be able to access these health services easily. Currently, it is very difficult to get any kind of treatment and often it is not covered by insurance.
What are your “5 things I wish someone told me when I first started” and why. Please share a story or example for each.
- Be fearless. Many times we limit our own opportunities because of fear. Other people are just as scared as you and you aren’t alone. Don’t let fear hold you back! GO FOR IT.
- Be the CEO of you! We are in charge of our own destiny and need to take responsibility for our choices. Run your life as if you were the CEO of a successful business, and don’t rely on others for your well-being, success and finances. Stand up for yourself and be the BOSS!
- Have confidence in yourself. Trust your abilities and if you are lacking a skill that is impeding your success, find a way to learn it. You don’t need to be perfect; you just need to make progress.
- Don’t limit yourself! Often times we stay within our comfort zone and follow the path of least resistance. Step outside your box, try something new, learn about other cultures, and try walking in someone else’s shoes, so you can learn other points of view.
- Assume you can do it! Take on anything you want and have a positive attitude with the assumption that if you work hard and smart enough, it will become successful.
If you could tell other young people one thing about why they should consider making a positive impact on our environment or society, like you, what would you tell them?
Think about the collateral benefits that will happen when you do something good. When you do something for someone else, YOU feel better. Look at how your actions can change someone’s life and make it better.
We are very blessed that many other Social Impact Heroes read this column. Is there a person in the world, or in the US, whom you would like to collaborate with, and why? He or she might see this. 🙂
There are so many! One example is Oprah Winfrey. I’m in awe of how she created her own opportunities by using her talent to become the powerhouse she is today. Watching how she started as a journalist and then evolved into TV, movies, producing and all aspects of media is simply incredible! She has integrated social change into everyday life and not as a one-time event.
I am also a big fan of Tiffany Haddish. She overcame so many obstacles in her life and yet kept moving forward to better herself. She has crafted a brilliant, diversified career and I love how she has her own unique style. I just love her style. If she wants to be friends and work on a project together, I’m waiting for her call! I already wrote some funny jokes for her!
Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote”? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your life?
When I was a teenager, I came up with my own motivational quote: “they can be richer than me, prettier than me and smarter than me, but they can’t OUTWORK ME!” I didn’t have any advantages. I had to create my own opportunities! The only thing I could control was how hard I worked. So, I used my work ethic and drive to do the best I could no matter what the job. If I didn’t know how to do something, I learned. If I didn’t have positive people around me, I searched and found them to have as mentors.
How can our readers follow you online?
My website is www.bobbiedyer.com.
This was great, thank you so much for sharing your story and doing this with us. We wish you continued success!
Thank you for the opportunity to share my story. I started with nothing and now I own four successful businesses and I am executive producer of a movie!
Filmmakers Making A Social Impact: Why & How Bobbie Dyer Is Helping To Change Our World was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.