An Interview With Jake Frankel
Postpartum depression can affect both mothers and their partners. Postpartum depression has been found to impact up to 10% of new fathers and is more likely to occur when their partner is also experiencing PPD. Both men and women may benefit from a combination of psychotherapy and medication as part of their treatment.
Postpartum depression affects millions of women worldwide, yet it remains a topic that is often misunderstood and stigmatized. Through this series, we aim to shed light on the various aspects of postpartum depression, including its symptoms, causes, treatment options, and the impact it has on individuals and families. As part of this series, we had the pleasure of interviewing Emily Zeller.
Emily Zeller received her Master’s degree in Marriage & Family Therapy from East Carolina University. Emily is a licensed marriage & family therapist with over a decade of experience providing online therapy to couples, individuals, and families living in Pennsylvania, Ohio & Illinois. Emily is intensively trained in Child-Parent Psychotherapy, and CBT & is a certified Enneagram consultant. She is the owner and founder of Zeller & Co. Therapy.
Emily is passionate about helping anxious and depressed moms learn how to decrease feelings of guilt, isolation, and insecurity, while improving their relationships, communication skills, and confidence. Outside of work, Emily enjoys spending time reading, traveling, and spending time with her husband and three daughters.
Thank you so much for joining us in this interview series. Before we begin, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you tell us a little about yourself?
I am originally from Toledo, Ohio, where I grew up with my parents and two younger brothers. After college in Illinois, I moved to North Carolina with my husband, Justin, for graduate school. I received my Master’s degree in Marriage & Family Therapy from East Carolina University. While there, I became certified in Child-Parent Psychotherapy before eventually landing in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. I have been in private practice for over a decade and have had my practice since 2021. I offer online therapy for moms, couples, and families all over Pennsylvania, Ohio & Illinois. I have my hands and heart full with three beautiful daughters — Lexi is 7 and Abby and Jessie, are 5 — identical in looks, but oh-so-different in personality!
Ok, thank you for that. Let’s now jump to the primary focus of our interview, about postpartum depression. Let’s start with a basic definition so that all of us are on the same page. Can you please tell us what postpartum depression is?
Postpartum depression (PPD) is a complex mental health condition that can impact women after childbirth. The symptoms include feelings of sadness that do not fade, anxiety, anger, and changes in mood, sleep, and appetite. This condition differs from “the baby blues” which typically refer to the first two weeks following birth. Unlike the baby blues, postpartum depression can begin during pregnancy and last beyond the first two weeks postpartum.
Can you discuss some common misconceptions about postpartum depression and why they are harmful?
Unfortunately, some individuals delay seeking help for postpartum depression (PPD). There is a misconception that the symptoms will simply “go away” over time and the condition is sometimes not taken as seriously as it should be. PPD symptoms may be dismissed as the “baby blues” when the individual is experiencing more severe symptoms for longer than two weeks. This mindset can be harmful because it often delays seeking treatment and support. In hindsight, many people realize they were experiencing postpartum depression, but didn’t seek help because they were waiting for “the fog to lift,” resulting in unnecessary prolonged suffering. If someone is experiencing PPD symptoms for longer than two weeks, I highly recommend seeking support to get screened by a healthcare professional.
Can you explain the role of hormonal changes in postpartum depression, and how does this influence treatment approaches?
While further research is needed to fully understand how PPD is influenced by hormonal changes, studies have indicated that the substantial decrease in estrogen and progesterone following childbirth plays an important role. Additionally, the decline in other hormones produced by the thyroid gland may contribute to the feelings of fatigue and depression commonly experienced by many women.
How does postpartum depression impact the bonding between a mother and her baby, and what interventions are available to address this?
The bond between mother and baby bond can be significantly impacted by PPD. Mothers struggling with PPD may find it challenging to feel attached and experience positive feelings towards their baby, making it challenging to consistently attend to both their own needs and those of their child. This can present as finding difficulty balancing the mother and child’s physical or emotional needs, such as bathing, feeding, or attending to the baby’s cries. Child-parent psychotherapy (CPP) offers an attachment-based approach proven to strengthen the mother’s relationship with her baby. Therapists provide support either in the home or in a neutral location to facilitate the development of a secure attachment through assessments and interventions that foster a greater connection between the mother and baby. Additionally, a combination of medication, practical support, and increased awareness before and during pregnancy can play a crucial role in addressing this issue. Asking your healthcare professional to provide specific resources on how to find help is the best way to start.
What are some of the best ways to treat postpartum depression?
Therapy provides a safe space for moms to explore their thoughts and feelings, while also equipping them with coping skills to confront negative thought patterns, strengthen their ability to seek support, and decrease depressive symptoms. Other treatment options can include group therapy, familial or community support, and lifestyle changes.
Support groups and family therapy can be beneficial in providing emotional validation and creating a treatment plan that includes their support system. While there may be resistance to prioritizing self-care, it is crucial to try to exercise regularly, get sufficient sleep, eat a balanced diet, and accept help. Each individual is different and will need a combination of modalities to best support both themselves and their infant.
In most cases, postpartum depression is best treated with a combination of medication and therapy. Medication can help alleviate symptoms of PPD and improve mood regulation by adjusting chemical imbalances in the brain. Women need to discuss treatment options with their healthcare provider to weigh the pros and cons of taking medication, especially if they are breastfeeding.
Based on your experience and research, can you please share “5 Things Everyone Should Know About Postpartum Depression?”
1 . Postpartum depression can affect both mothers and their partners. Postpartum depression has been found to impact up to 10% of new fathers and is more likely to occur when their partner is also experiencing PPD. Both men and women may benefit from a combination of psychotherapy and medication as part of their treatment.
Throughout my experience, I’ve had the privilege of working with numerous couples where the non-birthing partner often experiences feelings of isolation, overwhelm, and uncertainty about how best to support their partner, especially during the postpartum period. Couples therapy can serve as a valuable tool in creating a dedicated time and space for both partners to address individual needs and effectively communicate ways to provide optimal support and love to one another during this challenging period.
2 . PPD is more common than you think. Studies suggest that up to 15% of women (1/7) may experience symptoms of postpartum depression. It’s worth noting that symptoms may begin to develop during pregnancy, so it is important to share any signs or symptoms you may be experiencing with your healthcare professional, even before giving birth.
I’ve had the opportunity to work with women who didn’t initially recognize the severity of their feelings of sadness, anxiety, or doubt during pregnancy. It’s vital to communicate any signs or symptoms you may be experiencing with your healthcare professional at every appointment, both before and after birth. Seeking support early on can be instrumental in effectively managing symptoms and fostering the overall well-being of both you and your baby.
3 . It’s important to know that even if you didn’t experience postpartum depression with your first child, you may still encounter it with subsequent pregnancies. Whether it is their first or seventh baby, never assume because they didn’t have PPD the first time, they won’t experience it this time around.
For example, a mother giving birth for the third time may be surprised by feelings of sadness or emptiness because she did not experience those feelings following her previous births. She may attempt to counteract these emotions by forcing herself to feel grateful or compare herself to others, putting additional pressure on herself to adjust because she’s done this before. However, by refraining from self-judgment, she can recognize that while this experience may differ from previous ones, it is equally important to seek help to alleviate symptoms and adjust to this new stage of motherhood. Each pregnancy and postpartum period is unique, bringing its own set of circumstances and expectations. It’s crucial to remain observant and seek assistance if necessary, even months after delivery.
4 . The term “postpartum” refers to any time within the first year following childbirth. While postpartum depression typically emerges within the first few weeks or months after childbirth, some individuals may not experience symptoms until several months later.
It is common for extra support to be offered during the initial weeks after childbirth, followed by a sharp decline. This truth highlights the priority the importance of consistently checking in with both yourself and your loved ones throughout the entire motherhood journey.
5 . Postpartum depression is treatable! There is hope if you or someone you care about is struggling with adjusting to parenthood. A solid understanding of these concepts will result in a greater awareness, and decreased shame or guilt associated with stigmas, and will help provide practical resources and support to those affected by PPD.
What are some practical strategies for supporting a partner or loved one experiencing postpartum depression?
I think there are a few practical strategies that would make a loved one feel supported:
1 . Ask them directly what they need and how you can help. Give your loved one the opportunity to share what would be most helpful for them. If your partner is overwhelmed by that question, I’d offer them a few choices. Do they want to take a nap, go on a walk alone, or take a long shower? Sometimes giving options makes it easier to choose something.
When my first child was born, it was hard to balance taking care of both myself and the baby. While I appreciated people asking what I needed, I didn’t always know how to answer, However, when a friend would text me a message like, “Can I drop off dinner for you Monday or Wednesday night?” it provided relief and made it easier to make a decision.
2. Showing up and being present is often the best thing you can do. Offer to hold the baby, listen to them, or simply watch a show together. Many times listening without giving advice is all people need. Having worked with many new moms, I understand the feelings of isolation that can come following the birth of a child. Simply leaving the house can feel like a daunting task. That’s why gestures like offering to watch the baby can provide time for self-care, or spending time with your loved one during the day can be incredibly meaningful.”
3. Try not to take things personally. It can be hard to recognize that your loved one isn’t feeling fully like themselves and therefore not showing up for you the way they normally do. I highly recommend seeking support for yourself from someone else, whether that’s a therapist or a friend.
What are some cultural or societal factors that may contribute to the prevalence and experience of postpartum depression, and how can we address these effectively?
We need to recognize the profound identity shift a woman experiences when she gives birth — she faces mental, emotional, and physical changes all while learning how to take care of a new human. Being more transparent about the stress and expectations placed on mothers post-birth can help mothers feel less isolated and more likely to seek support.
Culturally, unrealistic expectations are thrust upon new parents immediately following birth. If a mother finds herself needing more space than desired, it can create added stress, guilt, and shame. Family members can alleviate pressure by asking when to visit and being more attentive to the parents’ needs than their own desires.
Many women grapple with feelings of embarrassment and guilt when experiencing postpartum depression, which makes it difficult to seek help. Normalizing how common postpartum depression and anxiety are can make it easier to ask for help. It’s beneficial for women to hear more stories of women who struggled with postpartum depression or anxiety and made it through to the other side.
Women often face immense pressure to “enjoy every second” of motherhood. This puts unrealistic expectations in their minds, leading them to doubt their capabilities as mothers if they aren’t enjoying every moment of being a mom. We need to be more transparent and encouraging by acknowledging that there are highs and lows in every stage of motherhood. No one does it perfectly and no one does it the same way!
You are a person of great influence. If you could start a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger. 🙂
If I could start a movement, I would want to empower moms to break free from the cycle of comparison and instead, embrace the value of making individual choices in motherhood. Comparison is truly the thief of joy and our access to constant social media exposure can lead to increased feelings of loneliness and insecurity. Rather than fostering a spirit of curiosity and appreciation for different lifestyle choices, there is a tendency towards confusion and division if people don’t live the same way. Don’t put yourself in an echo chamber — learn from other women who parent differently; take what you want to apply and leave the rest without judgment.
I am passionate about helping moms discover what truly aligns with their values, whether that’s pursuing a career inside or outside of the home, creating an identity within and beyond motherhood, or rebuilding relationships and hobbies. I believe in fostering a supportive community where each mother can feel empowered to make choices unique to her journey. My hope is for fellow mothers to embrace their authenticity and have confidence in their choices that extend to the next generation.
How can our readers further follow you online?
They can check out my website or find me on Facebook and Instagram at zellerandcotherapy!
Thank you for the time you spent sharing these fantastic insights. We wish you only continued success in your great work!
Emily Zeller Of Zeller & Co Therapy: 5 Things Everyone Should Know About Postpartum Depression was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.