Dianna Kokoszka of Keller Williams Maps and Coaching On How to Go Beyond Your Comfort Zone To Grow Both Personally and Professionally
An Interview with Maria Angelova
Embrace faith over fear: Walking on hot coals was a prime example of this, where I had to muster faith in myself to conquer the fear clouding my mind.
It feels most comfortable to stick with what we are familiar with. But anyone who has achieved great success will tell you that true growth comes from pushing yourself out of your comfort zone. What are some ways that influential people have pushed themselves out of their comfort zone to grow both personally and professionally? As a part of this series, I had the pleasure of interviewing Dianna Kokoszka.
Dianna Kokoszka is an Entrepreneur, Keynote Speaker, Author and Mentor. As an award-winning business leader, she has established herself as a prominent figure in the business world, developing many leaders during her longevity. Dedicating 13 years as CEO of KW MAPS Coaching and Training at Keller Williams Realty International, she played a pivotal role in propelling the company to become the largest and most profitable coaching enterprise in the real estate industry!
As innovator, creator and author of the KW BOLD Experience and Coaching Skills Camp she helped lead the company to be recognized as the number one training company in the world.
She is a board member of Growing Leaders, a John Maxwell Leadership Foundation Organization and captures every opportunity to journey alongside EQUIP Leadership Inc. a non-profit dedicated to instilling values in individuals, transforming nations.
Dianna is a Certified practitioner of Neuro- Linguistic Programing (NLP), a founding member of the John Maxwell Team of Certified Coaches, (IMC) and actively participating in the Strategic Coach training program. As a lifelong learner she has followed and been mentored by John C. Maxwell since mid-1990’s.
Her greatest passions revolve around developing leaders and encouraging individuals to recognize and harness their innate potential.
Amongst her impressive achievements, Dianna’s most cherished titles are wife, mother, and grandmother. Her genuine concern for the welfare of others serves as the driving forces behind all her endeavors, fueling her unwavering commitment to add value to others.
Thank you so much for doing this with us! Before we start, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you tell us a bit about your childhood backstory?
My upbringing can be described with the words “Work, learning, play, and service.”
I started work at age 5 at our family-owned grocery store. I was in charge of the magazine rack and was taught that if someone picked up a magazine with a car on it, I was to quickly choose 3 other magazines that had cars on them and say “If you like that one you may want to buy these too.”
I quickly advanced to being a clerk. Since I was only 8 years old I needed a step stool to reach the cash register. I learned how to give change, a lost art in today’s world. Stocking shelves, conducting inventory, polishing apples, you name it, I did it.
I lived the phrase, “if someone is paying you, you give it all you’ve got every minute.” Many people desired to hire our family members because of our strong work ethic.
I worked three jobs in college: telemarketing to sell magazines, selling homecare products, and hostess at the Holiday Inn. I learned to save in every way possible. Later I gave up being a hostess and worked in the physics lab. I loved learning about energy and have written about the four energies of success.
Who would have known I would end up in real estate? I visited office after office looking for someone to allow me to hang my license. Due to the field being dominated by men, it took me 12 offices before someone said “yes.”
The next hurdle I had to overcome was not being able to afford a babysitter. A little red Radio Flyer Wagon worked great. I put my kids in the wagon and went door to door speaking to anyone in the neighborhood that would have a conversation. I sold 104 homes in my first year, compared to the average agent who at the time was selling 5 homes per year.
Driven by my entrepreneurial spirit I expanded my real estate career, becoming a manager for a real estate company before venturing out to establish my own firm. My own firm grew to four locations. The world was taking me to new heights as I won Business Woman of the Year three times, Entrepreneur of the Year four times, and written up in papers for the accomplishments I was making to help other realtors.
Believing I had cracked the code, I launched a property management company, growing it to oversee 72 homes for various landlords. Maybe it was my lack of attention to the financial details, or perhaps my ego got the better of me — either way, a woman on my team ended up embezzling all the rental payments. Fast forward three months, and I found myself saddled with triple the payments for 72 homes. But, I buckled down and turned it around, becoming quite the savvy negotiator with mortgage companies and banks in the process.
I sold everything except my house and went back to selling real estate.
I hired a buyer’s agent, started building a team, continued to grow, and advanced to managing an office for Keller Williams.
Within a year, I was named CEO of MAPS Coaching and Training at Keller Williams Realty International in Austin, Texas. Under my guidance, we blossomed into the largest and most profitable coaching and training company in real estate. We received numerous accolades, including the prestigious Stevie and Prism awards, and were recognized as the number one training company worldwide.
During my tenure, I penned numerous training programs, but my personal favorites were “Coaching Skills Camp” and “BOLD (Business Objective: A Life by Design).” Crafting the BOLD laws and guiding agents through the 2009–2011 downturn was a remarkable experience. To this day, people reach out to tell me how those programs were game-changers in their lives, and many have persistently nudged me to write a book.
After a fulfilling 13-year stint at that position, which I absolutely loved, I continued my passion for real estate. Now, I’m an investor in Keller Williams regions and Market Centers, as well as numerous rental properties. Despite the constant influx of texts and emails urging me to write a book, my response remained: “Not now.”
One evening I was reading a book and a text came in where one person thanked me for helping them and asked when I was going to write a book. I thanked them for their kind words and went back to my book in which the next words told me what I should do.
Those words were a quote from John F. Kennedy: “If not you, who? If not now, when”?
Well, I started writing my book, which is called Becoming More: You Can’t Get to Better Until You Get to Different and is scheduled to release this October.
Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote”? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your life?
It truly depends on the circumstances I find myself in. My favorite would be the one that fits the occasion. Jim Rohn taught me to work harder on myself than I did on my job. Zig Ziglar said, “If your thinkin’ is stinkin’ then you need a checkup from the neck up.” When things get rough, which they will from day to day I say, “Everything is always working out for me.” I think my favorite quote was from Einstein, “There are two ways to live your life, one is that nothing is a miracle, the other is as though everything is a miracle.”
My dad once taught me a valuable lesson by telling me that the path to success wasn’t about what I wanted to be when I grew up. He said everyone carries a sign, and figuring out what that sign says is the key to success. As a ninth grader, I didn’t care much about this metaphorical sign, yet my dad would persistently ask me at every dinner if I had figured it out.
One evening, as I waited for a friend at the local drugstore’s soda fountain counter (yes, I’m that old), I was sipping on a vanilla Coke. A woman next to me struck up a conversation, and when my friend arrived, I politely told her it was nice chatting. To that, she replied, “Thanks for the conversation, it made me feel important.” Suddenly, it clicked. That’s what the sign read.
Rushing home, I excitedly told my dad, “I think the sign reads ‘make me feel important’”. He nodded approvingly, adding that some people carry tiny signs, while others have gigantic billboards with flashing lights. The trick is to always make people understand their importance to you, because everyone matters. This is one of many family wisdoms that have guided me through life.
Is there a particular book, podcast, or film that made a significant impact on you? Can you share a story or explain why it resonated with you so much?
The movie “Miracle on Ice”.
As a leader, I used many of the strategies and tactics I learned in this movie.
Herb Brooks was the coach of the US Hockey team. He set the goal to take the GOLD in the 1980 US Olympics. This was a lofty goal since the Russians were destined to win, for no one had been able to beat them for years. Brooks cast the vision and worked diligently to obtain buy-in from each player. He even gave them a test to determine their perspective and the limits they placed upon themselves. He determined the depth of their commitment, testing each player’s boundaries so he could push them to their highest potential.
Placing the right players in the right positions, he matched skills to see who should be on the ice playing together.
Though I didn’t agree with some of his demanding tactics, I did learn that high standards and an unwavering belief in people matter.
Brooks was strategic and never lost sight of the end goal they were working toward. When they faced the Russians, the best hockey team in the world at the time, he gave a riveting locker room speech that many have listened to over and over again: “Tonight is our night.” And it was, as the American team made history with their triumphant win over the Russians, and then to be victorious over Sweden coveting the gold medal in the Winter Olympics.
I put these practices to work for me as CEO and believe that you do whatever it takes to achieve the goal, as long as it is moral and within my values.
A book is “Intentional Living” by John C. Maxwell also had a significant impact on me. This taught me to be intentional about what I thought, said, and what I did as a leader.
Let’s now shift to the main part of our discussion. Let’s start with a basic definition so that all of us are on the same page. What does “getting outside of your comfort zone” mean?
Getting outside your comfort zone means getting outside the cage you have so carefully built around yourself with your thoughts. That cage where you feel safe, secure, and in control. Where you are always looking good and being right, not being challenged in any way or forced into learning new skills. Our brain likes the familiar, easy, and comfortable way of life. When we speak about getting outside your comfort zone you must open the door to the cage and venture out into unfamiliar territory, taking on new challenges — feeling the fear and doing it anyway.
Can you help articulate a few reasons why it is important to get out of your comfort zone?
Can a caterpillar become a butterfly soaring through the air without leaving its cocoon?
You can’t get to better until you get to different. If you desire to become better than you are then you must have personal growth.
Everything worthwhile is uphill, and as John Maxwell says “We have uphill dreams with downhill habits.”
Although it may initially feel uncomfortable or challenging, stepping outside your comfort zone can lead to personal growth, increased resilience, and the discovery of new strengths and abilities. It allows you to overcome limitations, face your fears, and embrace new opportunities that can ultimately enhance your overall well-being and success in various areas of life.
Is it possible to grow without leaving your comfort zone? Can you explain what you mean?
If there is growth it will be very small. Radio Shack, Sears, and Blockbuster were comfortable being the goliaths in their industry and we know where that got them. When we exercise we place microscopic tears in our muscles, which is not comfortable, yet this is what makes them grow. Challenging ourselves is where we find growth as well.
Can you share some anecdotes from your personal experience? Can you share a story about a time when you stepped out of your comfort zone and how it helped you grow? How does it feel to take those first difficult steps?
Getting outside your comfort zone starts by choosing to take the first step. Entering the field of real estate, I visited 12 offices before someone would hire another woman, for the field at that time was dominated by men. Not being able to afford a babysitter, I placed my children in a red Radio Flyer wagon and went door to door daily persuading people to choose me as their Realtor. I knew that each minute counted, and my dedication paid off as I sold 104 homes in my first year.
Driven by my entrepreneurial spirit, I expanded my real estate career, becoming a manager for a real estate company before venturing out to establish my own firm, which grew to four locations. Being innovative helped me earn numerous accolades, including Business Woman of the Year three times and Entrepreneur of the Year four times.
Recognizing the need for property management services, I created a division that cared for 72 homes. Unfortunately, my trust was broken when a friend mishandled the financial aspects, leading to financial ruin for me. This painful experience taught me a valuable lesson, to always watch my money, as well as the importance of vigilance.
Being forced to sell my company, furniture, and other assets I reentered selling real estate to repay the debt. Thank goodness for my determination and work ethic.
Feel the fear and do it anyway. The first step is all it takes.
Here is the central question of our discussion. What are your “five ways to push past your comfort zone, to grow both personally and professionally”?
- Embrace faith over fear: Walking on hot coals was a prime example of this, where I had to muster faith in myself to conquer the fear clouding my mind.
- Engage in challenging activities: An instance was when I trained with the Navy Seals. It was physically grueling, with tasks like running through tires, carrying weights, and crawling under netting, but it pushed my limits.
- Continuous learning: Reading books and applying the knowledge helps me excel professionally.
- Face your fears: Skydiving was a test of my courage, a clear example of feeling fear but going ahead anyway.
- Travel and try new things: Traveling to various countries and trying different cuisines pushed me beyond my comfort zone.
- Set audacious goals: Set objectives so ambitious that people might scoff at them. Then, learn, implement, fail, and learn better ways until you achieve them.
Additional tactics include door-to-door sales during a hot summer with my kids in a red Radio Flyer wagon, recognizing that growth often emerges from struggle (like childbirth), and my 5×5 program. This involves doing five things for at least five minutes each day, such as reading, listening to uplifting music, setting daily priorities, seeking investment opportunities, praying, and expressing gratitude to five people in my life.
From your experience or perspective, what are some of the common barriers that keep someone from pushing out of their comfort zone?
- Fear of Failure: Many people hesitate to move forward because they fear failure or looking foolish. The key is learning to succeed at failure, understanding that frequent failures often lead to the highest levels of success.
- Negative Self-talk: We all have those inner voices in our heads, constantly chatting even when we try to rest. Often, it’s the negative voice dominating our thoughts, eroding our self-confidence, and discouraging us from taking risks. It’s crucial to nurture the empowering voice that boosts our self-belief, which we can do through affirmations.
- Peer Pressure: The fear of being judged or criticized can also hinder us from pushing our boundaries, limiting our personal growth.
- Lack of Support: Not having encouragement from important people in our lives can confine us within our self-made comfort cages, sometimes leading to isolation that makes it harder to overcome these barriers.
- Past Experiences or Traumas: Previous experiences or traumas can create emotional hurdles, making us hesitant to engage in situations or activities that might end up unsuccessful.
- Lack of Passionate Goals: Not having goals that ignite our passion can also prevent us from stepping out of our comfort zone.
There is a well-known quote attributed to Eleanor Roosevelt that says, “Do something that scares you every day”. What exactly does this mean to you? Is there inherent value in doing something that pushes you out of your comfort zone, even if it does not relate to personal or professional growth? For example, if one is uncomfortable about walking alone at night should they purposely push themselves to do it often for the sake of going beyond their comfort zone? Can you please explain what you mean?
The quote can be taken in a multitude of ways. For me, it’s about embracing challenges and continually pushing your boundaries. It might mean extending your workout or ramping up your exercise difficulty.
It’s about going beyond your norm. Writing a book, for instance. Public speaking is another example (I love it — it energizes me, but I know it terrifies most people. Some say the only fear bigger than death is public speaking. I’ve even heard that death is the second biggest fear and public speaking is third, with death by public speaking taking the top spot!)
When it comes to actions like walking alone at night, I believe it’s essential to be mindful of personal safety. Facing fears should go hand-in-hand with assessing potential risks. Instead of walking alone, consider a self-defense class first, or find a well-lit, busy path. It’s about balancing the act of challenging ourselves while ensuring personal wellbeing. Remember, we all emit an energetic vibe. If every step is filled with fear, you might be inadvertently inviting trouble.
You are a person of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be?
I am currently involved in the movement of transformation with John Maxwell leadership foundation EQUIP and Growing Leaders, traveling around the globe. Values are being taught as an actual class to children in the schools. The books are provided for each child to keep — for many this is the first book they have ever owned,
The curriculum they learn is about values, how to implement values, and ultimately lead with values. The results are starting to show up: In Guatemala, the crime rate has dropped by over 10 percent. In South Carolina, the first state to implement the program in the US, bullying has lowered by over 20 percent. The program is currently in Paraguay, Dominican Republic, Guatemala, Panama, Brazil, Honduras, Papa New Guinea, and Costa Rica, and others are requesting to join daily. States such as South Carolina with Oklahoma and Texas viewing the program.
I’d like to start a Gratitude — Encouragement Movement. Having everyone wake up and before their feet hit the floor say 5 things they are grateful for, or make 1–5 calls or texts per day encouraging others telling them why you are grateful that person is in your life.
Is there a person in the world whom you would love to have lunch with, and why? Maybe we can tag them and see what happens!
Dolly Parton. Her radiant smile is a reflection of how she lives her values, amplifies her talent, and generously gives back to others. We share a passion for helping children with books, giving them access to read and learn from. I have enjoyed joining the John Maxwell Foundation on transformational trips to countries around the world, watching values being taught and caught. Dolly’s love for people, hard work, and dedication as well as her continuous growth has enabled her to be more, do more, have more, and give more.
How can our readers follow you online?
Diannakokoszka.com
Becomingmorebook.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dianna.kokoszka/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/diannakokoszka/
Linked in: https://www.linkedin.com/in/diannak/
Thank you so much for sharing these important insights. We wish you continued success and good health!
About The Interviewer: Maria Angelova, MBA is a disruptor, author, motivational speaker, body-mind expert, Pilates teacher and founder and CEO of Rebellious Intl. As a disruptor, Maria is on a mission to change the face of the wellness industry by shifting the self-care mindset for consumers and providers alike. As a mind-body coach, Maria’s superpower is alignment which helps clients create a strong body and a calm mind so they can live a life of freedom, happiness and fulfillment. Prior to founding Rebellious Intl, Maria was a Finance Director and a professional with 17+ years of progressive corporate experience in the Telecommunications, Finance, and Insurance industries. Born in Bulgaria, Maria moved to the United States in 1992. She graduated summa cum laude from both Georgia State University (MBA, Finance) and the University of Georgia (BBA, Finance). Maria’s favorite job is being a mom. Maria enjoys learning, coaching, creating authentic connections, working out, Latin dancing, traveling, and spending time with her tribe. To contact Maria, email her at angelova@rebellious-intl.com. To schedule a free consultation, click here.
Dianna Kokoszka of Keller Williams Maps and Coaching On How to Go Beyond Your Comfort Zone To Grow… was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.