Danielle Palli Of Birdland Media Works On How Simplifying & Decluttering Your Life Can Make You Happier
An Interview With Drew Gerber
Find your tribe. You may find that in your de-cluttering, you need to reduce the time you spend with people who drain your energy or who are not aligned with your values in life. When you do so, you create room for people who support your wellbeing.
We live in a time of great excess. We have access to fast fashion, fast food, and fast everything. But studies show that all of our “stuff” is not making us any happier. How can we simplify and focus on what’s important? How can we let go of all the clutter and excess and find true happiness? In this interview series, we are talking to coaches, mental health experts, and authors who share insights, stories, and personal anecdotes about “How Simplifying and Decluttering Your Life Can Make Us Happier.” As a part of this series, I had the distinct pleasure of interviewing Danielle Palli.
Danielle Palli is a Board-Certified Positive Psychology & Mindfulness Coach, multi-genre author and book coach. She is also an ordained metaphysical minister, multimedia content creator, podcast producer and voiceover artist. While her work seems varied, her purpose lies in creating educational content that supports mindfulness and wellbeing for all, and coaching women seeking to find more joy, peace and purpose in life.
Thank you so much for doing this with us! Before we dive in, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you share your “backstory” with us? What was it that led you to your eventual career choice?
Let me start with the “elephant in the room,” so to speak. I spent the first nearly nineteen years of my life growing up in what I later learned was referred to as a “doomsday cult.” I did not know how we were perceived by the outside world until I left the church. It took me a really long time to understand how my environment shaped my life — my career, my relationships, my self-worth. It took me decades to truly discover who I was as a person, what I wanted in life, and to value what I had to offer the world. Now, I get to support women who may not have experienced exactly what I did, but are finding their personal power and what they want in life. I want to save them all the time it took me to figure it out by offering tools and support.
Can you share the most interesting story that happened to you since you started your career?
While I left my religion behind, I was still deeply spiritual, and wanted to find connection with the universe. I needed clarity from the clutter that was in my mind. I was living in Manhattan and feeling anxious about college, money, work, relationships; you name it. I visited a meditation center and vowed to sit and stare at the mandala they had on their wall until I stopped thinking so much. I thought, and thought, and thought, and sometime later (an hour? Two? I’m not sure), my mind stopped, and I felt complete bliss. It was my first experience with meditation where the world in my brain stopped spinning, and it felt miraculous.
Are you working on any exciting new projects now? How do you think that will help people?
Yes! Thank you for asking. I just finished publishing the I Am Enough Workbook for building personal power and seizing opportunities. It’s filled with 52 weeks of exercises for developing greater peace, mindfulness, and self and social awareness. Tied to that, will be an online program that guides women through a journey of personal growth and discovery using creative writing, journaling and other art forms to tell their story. Because it is founded on my studies in positive psychology and emotional intelligence, along with personal experience, I hope participants leave feeling good about themselves with a clear direction in life.
Can you share with our readers a bit about why you are an authority on the topic of “How Simplifying and Decluttering Your Life Can Make You Happier”?
As a Positive Psychology & Mindfulness coach and metaphysical minister, I have been leading mediations and workshops for the past 22 years. What I’ve found is that people find the most joy when they take time to clear out the clutter in their minds, their environment and their lives. Consciously deciding for yourself what is no longer serving you is a mindfulness activity in itself, requiring you to focus on what is truly important. Once you understand what your values are, it simply becomes a question of removing from your life what is no longer in alignment with those values.
Ok, thank you for that. Let’s now jump to the main focus of our interview. We live in a time of excess. We have access to so much. But studies show that all of our “stuff” is not making us any happier. Can you articulate for our readers a few reasons why all of our possessions are not giving us happiness?
I have to give a nod to Cognitive Scientist and Professor of Psychology at Yale University Laurie Santos for teaching a groundbreaking course called The Science of Happiness. What is beautiful about the course is that Santos identifies the science behind “why stuff doesn’t make us happy.” Our society tells us that success means having lots of “bright and shiny” things, and if you have it all — the right job, the right house, the perfect car, you will be successful and that this equals happiness. But once we have whatever the “it” is, we quickly adapt to it and look to the next object of our desire that we think will give us that same joy. Our brains give off hormones that relate to wellbeing when we get what we want, but it is unsustainable, which can send us in a pattern of trying to accumulate more and more. On top of that, society often encourages us to compare ourselves to others. If we see others having what we perceive we lack, that also thwarts our happiness.
On a broader societal level, how do you think this excessiveness may be harming our communities and society?
How isn’t it harming us? Our excessive lifestyles drain environmental resources that puts our very planet at risk. We make ourselves miserable when we try to live up to what we perceive society expects of us. And the more we have, the more we need to put energy into maintaining those possessions, which drains our bodies, minds and bank accounts.
The irony of struggling with happiness in modern times is glaring. In many places in the world today, we have more than ever before in history. Yet despite this, so many people are unhappy. Why is simplifying a solution? How would simplifying help people to access happiness?
Simplifying all areas of your life makes you focus on what is important to you and what isn’t. When you start with the clutter in your home, the very process of getting rid of what no longer serves you can be healing. Beyond the material, people have connections to the objects they are holding on to. I encourage people to ask themselves, “What is no longer serving me?” You will feel greater peace when you consciously choose what to part with and what to keep. Because what you have consciously chosen to keep reflects what you value the most and you will develop a greater sense of gratitude for what you have instead of focusing on what you don’t.
Can you share some insights from your own experience? Where in your life have you transformed yourself from not having enough to finally experiencing enough? For example, many people feel they don’t have enough money. Yet, people define abundance differently, and often, those with the least money can feel the most abundant. Where in your health, wealth, or relationships have you transformed your life?
It begins with mindset. For me, having grown up in an environment where I never felt as if I were good enough led to me making choices coming from a severe lack of self-worth. The reason I wrote the I Am Enough workbook is because it took me a long time to recognize that everything I need to be happy is within me. I have the resources and skills to lead a purposeful life. Once a person is happy with who they are as a person, and recognizes their contribution to the world, having superficial standards of wealth and “keeping up with the Joneses” is no longer important.
People, places, and things shape our lives. For example, your friends generate conversations that influence you. Where you live impacts what you eat and how you spend your time. The “things” in your life, like phones, technology, or books impact your recreation. Can you tell us a little about how people, places, and things in your own life impact your experience of “experiencing enough?”
I think the key word here is “experiences.” There is nothing wrong with wanting to earn a good living so that it can afford you comfort and security, provide recreation and help you savor life. Having “things” can bring us joy as long as we experience genuine gratitude for what we have and live in moderation. But science also suggests that experiences bring us greater happiness than material possessions, and social connection is essential for our wellbeing. I can use an example from my own life. I love to travel. You need money to do that. But I can adjust my travel expenses by how I get to my destination, where I stay, etc. by defining what level of comfort I need to make the experience a good one. Additionally, it is the people who share in our travel experience, our travel mates, and the people we meet on the journey that really affect our feelings of “enough-ness.”
What advice would you give to younger people about “experiencing enough?”
I would advise young people to not buy into what social media, advertising and society tells us we should want, or what they promise for our happiness. I would suggest limiting the time spent scrolling online in favor of gathering your tribe of friends and supporters for in person connection. Surround yourself with people who love you. And, if you’re going to invest in anything, invest in opportunities that will help you become a better person on the inside versus looking impressive on the outside.
This is the main question of our interview. Based on your experience and research, can you share your “five ways we can simplify and declutter our lives to make us happier?”
Yes. I am happy to. 1. Physically de-clutter your environment. De-cluttering is a mindfulness activity in itself. It makes you focus on what is important to you and what isn’t. Beyond the material, people have connections to the objects they are holding on to. Ask yourself, “What is no longer serving me?” You will feel greater peace when you consciously choose what to part with. 2. Give to others. As you choose items you no longer need, consider giving them to charity. As you box those items up, send an intention that the recipient of your gift will benefit from it. Giving to others increases our happiness, our sense of social connection, and benefits the receiver. 3. De-clutter your mind. Spend time practicing meditation and activities that encourage mindfulness to clear out the clutter in your mind for greater peace and clarity. Here is one place to start: https://insighttimer.com/daniellepalli. 4. Practice gratitude. Examine your life and express gratitude for all that you have in all areas of your life. This includes gratitude for having enough food and warm shelter, people who love and support you, luxuries that you are lucky enough to have that others may not. When you focus on what you are grateful for, your brain begins to actively seek out all the positives in your surroundings. 5. Find your tribe. You may find that in your de-cluttering, you need to reduce the time you spend with people who drain your energy or who are not aligned with your values in life. When you do so, you create room for people who support your wellbeing.
You are a person of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger. 🙂
I would inspire a movement of kindness. Every interaction we have with another person, no matter how large or small, is an opportunity to make their life better — with a smile, a kind word, an act of service. If each person would treat every interaction as a sacred experience with another person, the world would become a more peaceful place.
How can our readers further follow your work online?
Thank you for asking. People can reach me at www.BirdlandMediaWorks.com or send me an email at Danielle@BirdlandMediaWorks.com.
This was very inspiring. Thank you so much for the time you spent on this. We wish you only continued success.
About The Interviewer: For 30 years, Drew Gerber has been inspiring those who want to change the world. Drew is the CEO of Wasabi Publicity, Inc., a full-service PR agency lauded by PR Week and Good Morning America. Wasabi Publicity, Inc. is a global marketing company that supports industry leaders, change agents, unconventional thinkers, companies and organizations that strive to make a difference. Whether it’s branding, traditional PR or social media marketing, every campaign is instilled with passion, creativity and brilliance to powerfully tell their clients’ story and amplify their intentions in the world.
Danielle Palli Of Birdland Media Works On How Simplifying & Decluttering Your Life Can Make You… was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.