Co-regulate During Struggles: When your child is having a hard time, be physically and emotionally present. They just need to know you’re in their corner.

In today’s fast-paced business world, women in executive roles face the unique challenge of balancing high-powered careers with the demands of motherhood. Despite progress in workplace equality, female executives often carry a disproportionate share of domestic responsibilities. How do these successful women manage both spheres of their lives so effectively? In this interview series, we would like to explore this intricate balance and we are talking to women executives from various industries who are also mothers, to share their insights and strategies for successfully juggling their professional and personal lives. As a part of this series, we had the pleasure of interviewing Amy Vale.

Amy Vale is the founder of For the Cubs, a company providing quality essentials for young children while supporting kids in foster care. Motivated by her experience as a foster parent, Amy transitioned from a successful marketing career with brands like Spotify and charity:water to entrepreneurship, to launch For the Cubs. After undergoing foster care training, Amy knew she found a gap in the market. For the Cubs’ hero product, Percy — a weighted plush bear named after her late grandfather — embodies Amy’s mission to provide comfort and belonging to every child.

Thank you so much for joining us in this interview series! Can you tell us the “backstory” behind what brought you to this point in your career?

My journey to this point was sparked by burnout. After years in startups with relentless demands, I found myself questioning if this was truly the path I wanted. Those experiences, though challenging, taught me valuable lessons about what I didn’t want in a business.

I envisioned creating something different — a company where both customers and team members feel valued and part of something meaningful. While I didn’t have a specific business idea initially, I knew I wanted to leverage my C-suite experience to build an organization with a strong sense of purpose and community.

This vision became the driving force behind my current venture, For the Cubs, pushing me to redefine success not just in terms of profits, but in the positive impact we could make on our stakeholders’ lives.

Can you share with us how many children you have or have cared for?

So far, I’ve been a foster mom to nine kids, all of them under the age of 6, the youngest being four months old.

Where were you in your career when your child was born/became part of your family?

I was building For the Cubs and consulting as a fractional CMO when we had our first placement of a sibling set of a 3-year-old and an 18-month-old.

Did you always want to be a mother? Can you explain?

Motherhood wasn’t always part of my plan. I questioned my aptitude for it, lacking that instinctive drive some women describe. Balancing an executive career with motherhood seemed like an impossible feat, and I deeply admire those who manage it.

Our move to Austin, Texas, was a turning point. The city’s more relaxed pace and different definition of success made me reconsider. Here, I could envision a life where career ambitions and family life weren’t mutually exclusive.

This shift in environment helped me see motherhood as a possibility, rather than a completely foreign concept. It opened my eyes to a new kind of balance I hadn’t thought achievable before.

Did motherhood happen when you thought it would or did it take longer? If it took longer, what advice would you have for another woman in your shoes?

My journey to motherhood took longer than expected, albeit different than pregnancy, it mirrored some of the complex emotions of becoming a biological mother. After deciding we were ready, we faced a year of training, delays, and inefficiencies from the foster care system. Just when we thought we were all set, our placement agency shut down, forcing us to start over with a new agency.

This process awakened a sense of longing I hadn’t experienced before. I felt ready to be a mother, even though I couldn’t fully grasp what that meant until I was caring for a child.

To women on a similar path, whether pursuing biological motherhood or fostering, my advice is simple: give yourself grace. The journey can be unpredictable and emotionally taxing, but it’s also a time of profound personal growth.

Remember, your path to motherhood is uniquely yours. Patience and self-compassion are crucial as you navigate the challenges and uncertainties. The waiting period, though difficult, can be a valuable time for reflection and preparation.

Can you tell us a bit about what your day-to-day schedule looks like?

My day typically starts at 6 AM, especially when we’re fostering. This early start allows me to prepare for the day ahead, packing bags and preparing bottles before the child wakes up.

6:30–7:30 AM: Wake, feed, and prepare the child for daycare.
7:30–8:00 AM: Drop off the child and our dogs at daycare.
8:30–9:00 AM: Start my workday, sometimes after a short nap if night duty was challenging.
My work hours are split between:

• Managing For the Cubs
• Consulting work
• Handling documentation and coordinating with the child’s foster care team

5:00 PM: Begin evening preparations.
5:10 PM: Daycare pickup for the child and dogs.
5:30–8:00 PM: Evening routine including dinner, bath, playtime, and bedtime for the child. 8:00–9:00 PM: Personal downtime, dinner, and relaxation.
9:00 PM: Bedtime

As a frequent solo parent due to my husband’s music career, I’ve learned to be highly organized and flexible. This schedule allows me to balance the demands of fostering, running a business, and maintaining personal well-being.

Has being a parent changed your career path? Can you explain?

Parenthood has significantly impacted my career path, teaching me valuable lessons about balance and prioritization. During our last foster placement, the intensive daily documentation and reporting required for the child’s case consumed much of my time. This led to challenges in managing For the Cubs, resulting in Percy being out of stock for three months.

This experience was a wake-up call. I realized I couldn’t effectively juggle both responsibilities alone. It became clear that to sustain and grow the business while being fully present for our foster children, I needed to build a stronger support system.

Now, as we prepare for our next placement, I’m focusing on expanding our team and resources. This approach will ensure the business can thrive even when my attention is needed elsewhere.
The period after the child’s reunification with her family felt like starting over for the business. While I don’t regret prioritizing the child’s needs, it highlighted the importance of having robust systems and resources in place.

Ultimately, this journey has reinforced that with the right support, it’s possible to pursue both entrepreneurship and fostering. It’s about creating a structure that allows for flexibility and shared responsibilities.

Has being a caretaker made you better at your job? How so?

Being a caretaker has undoubtedly enhanced my professional skills. While I previously considered myself adept at multitasking, prioritizing, and planning, caring for children has elevated these abilities to new levels.

The experience has taught me:

1. The critical importance of systems.
2. How efficiency and structure directly impact daily operations.
3. The art of adapting quickly to changing circumstances.

These lessons have seamlessly translated into my work, improving my:

• Organizational skills
• Time management
• Ability to handle multiple priorities simultaneously
• Crisis management and problem-solving abilities

Ultimately, the demanding and unpredictable nature of caregiving has made me more resilient, flexible, and effective in my professional life. It’s reinforced that with the right systems and mindset, one can navigate complex situations both at home and in business.

What are the biggest challenges you face being a working foster parent?

The biggest challenge as a working foster parent is balancing the emotional weight of the foster care system. Surprisingly, parenting itself is often the easiest part. The real difficulties lie in:

1. Witnessing the harsh realities of a broken system.
2. Carrying concerns about the child’s future.
3. Managing work around court hearings and parental visits.
4. Coping with case developments that can be emotionally devastating for the child.

I’ve learned to adjust my work schedule around these demands. Court hearing days are now non-working days. Weekly parental visits require significant emotional capacity to support the child before and after. Often, I scale back to the bare minimum at work when case developments shake me to my core.

This experience has taught me the importance of flexibility and self-care in maintaining both my professional responsibilities and my commitment to fostering.

Are there any stories you remember from the early days of fostering that you want to share?

A poignant memory from our early fostering days involves our first placement — a sibling set we took for short-term respite care. Despite our initial plan to foster one child at a time, we couldn’t refuse these siblings in need.

We received minimal background information, only to discover both had strep throat, and one was non-verbal with recent physical trauma. This child’s emotional burden was palpable daily. I was mid-way through designing Percy at the time, and it became evident that ongoing support for kids as they develop their ability to process big emotions was a need. And not just for children in foster care, but for kids in general. It’s something that parents have become more attuned to in recent years, but as I researched parenting on various social platforms, it became evident that there was still a need for resources.

The moment that truly defined my journey into motherhood came unexpectedly. After days of helping him process trauma, we arrived at daycare to pick them up. Seeing us through the window, his face lit up with pure joy as he ran to greet us. That evening, he called us ‘mama’ and ‘papa’ for the first time.

This child, who struggled with trauma and feeling safe, had found a safe attachment with us. It was then I truly felt like a mom, understanding the profound impact of providing a secure, stable environment amidst the pain of trauma and struggle.

Are there any meaningful activities or traditions you’ve made up or implemented that have enhanced your time with your family? Can you share a story or example?

For every child in our care, we make a point to celebrate all holidays and special events, often because it might be their first experience with that particular occasion.

Our approach includes:

1. Special outfits for each event
2. Taking plenty of photos to capture the moments
3. Creating joyful experiences around these celebrations

For instance, with our recent foster daughter, we marked everything from Valentine’s Day to the solar eclipse to Easter with festive attire and commemorative pictures.

We’re acutely aware that being in foster care is inherently traumatic for a child. Our goal in celebrating these moments is twofold:

1. To provide immediate joy and normalcy in their lives
2. To create positive memories for their future

When these children look back at these photos someday, we want them to see that despite the challenging circumstances, there were moments of happiness and lightness. We hope these visual reminders will show them that even during this difficult chapter, they were loved, celebrated, and part of a family that cared deeply about their experiences and memories.

We all live in a world with many deadlines and incessant demands for our time and attention. That inevitably makes us feel rushed and we may feel that we can’t spare the time to be “fully present” with our children. Can you share with our readers 5 strategies about how we can create more space in our lives in order to give our children more quality attention?

In our fast-paced world, finding quality time for our children can be challenging. Here are five strategies to create more space and give our children the attention they deserve:

1. Minimize Digital Distractions: Put your phone away during family time. This simple act shows your children they have your undivided attention.
2. Your Time is all They Want: Remember that children value your presence more than you can ever imagine. Engage in activities together, even if it’s just sitting and talking, singing or playing.
3. Practice Open Communication: On difficult days, acknowledge the challenges out loud. This teaches children resilience and the importance of trying again. For example, “Today was tough, wasn’t it? High five for doing our best. Let’s tackle tomorrow together.”
4. Be Mindful of Your Energy: Children are highly perceptive. If you’re calm and present, they’re more likely to mirror that behavior.
5. Co-regulate During Struggles: When your child is having a hard time, be physically and emotionally present. They just need to know you’re in their corner.

How do you inspire a child to “dream big”? Can you give an example or story?

Inspiring a child to ‘dream big’ starts early and should be woven into their daily life. Here’s how I approached it with my foster daughter:

1. Daily Affirmations: Every night, we’d stand together in front of a mirror. I’d look into the mirror at her, meet her eyes and say affirmations cheerfully:

• “Jay is smart.”
• “Jay is brave.”
• “Jay is confident.”
• “Jay is kind.”
• “Jay is strong.”
• “Jay can be anything she wants to be.”

As a gift for her 1st birthday, I authored a children’s book based on these affirmations, which she’ll be receiving soon. It’s a way for her to be reminded of what makes her special beyond how she looks in a format that feels accessible as she grows up. As I was writing the book, it occurred to me that the messages within it are important for other children to hear, so I’m excited to share that I’ll be launching this soon, just in time for the holidays.

1. Diverse Role Models: I regularly read her children’s books about remarkable women, exposing her to a variety of inspiring figures and career paths.
2. Consistency is Key: By making these positive messages a part of her daily routine, her brain naturally began to internalize them.

The goal is to create an environment where dreaming big feels normal and achievable. When children consistently hear they’re capable and see examples of others achieving great things, it becomes easier for them to envision grand possibilities for themselves.

Remember, it’s not about occasional grand gestures, but about the small, everyday actions that shape a child’s worldview and self-belief.

How do you define success in both your career and your family life, and how has this definition evolved over time?

My definition of success has undergone a significant transformation, particularly since becoming a parent.

Pre-children success metrics:

• Career-focused
• Emphasis on financial gains
• Importance placed on job titles and driving business outcomes

Current success metrics:

• Financial stability (paying bills, living comfortably)
• Family-oriented growth
• Individual thriving for each family member

A tangible example of this shift: Previously, I might wake up to stress-inducing messages from a demanding boss. Now, my middle-of-the-night awakenings are to the gentle babbling of a little one on the baby monitor, accompanied by notifications of new orders for my business.

This evolution reflects a more holistic view of success, encompassing:

1. Work-life balance
2. Personal fulfillment
3. Family well-being
4. Sustainable business growth

Ultimately, success now feels like creating a harmonious blend of professional achievement and family joy, where both aspects of life support and enrich each other rather than compete.

What are your favorite books, podcasts, or resources that inspire you to be a better parent? Can you explain why you like them?

• How to talk so kids will listen & listen so kids will talk by Adele Faber & Elaine Mazlish for learning how to communicate more effectively
• The whole brain child by Daniel J. Siegel to help nurture healthy brain development and emotional intelligence
• Big Little Feelings on IG and their podcast After Bedtime for not feeling alone in the wild ride that is parenting kids
• Mary Van Geffen on IG for parenting the spicy kiddos
• Good Inside with Dr Becky podcast for learning that a lot of the old modes of parenting don’t actually work and alternatives on how to approach the daily struggles of parenting.

Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote” that you share or plan to share with your kids?

My favorite ‘Life Lesson Quote’ that I share with my children is:

‘Everything worth having isn’t easy and takes time.’

This message feels increasingly crucial in our world of instant gratification. It encapsulates several important life lessons:

1. Value of Patience: Good things often require waiting and persistent effort.
2. Importance of Hard Work: Worthwhile achievements rarely come without challenges.
3. Building Resilience: Facing difficulties is part of the journey to success.
4. Appreciation for Process: The path to achieving goals is as valuable as the outcome.
5. Realistic Expectations: Life’s most rewarding experiences and accomplishments aren’t instantaneous.

When I reflect on the aspects of my life I value most — in both my career and personal spheres — I see how this principle has played out. Each significant achievement or meaningful relationship has been the result of time, effort, and often, overcoming obstacles.

By sharing this perspective with my children, I hope to instill in them a mindset that embraces challenges, values perseverance, and finds fulfillment in the journey of personal growth and achievement.

If you could sit down with every new parent and offer life hacks, must-have products, or simple advice, what would be on your list?

If I could sit down with every new parent, here’s the essential advice I’d share:

1. Prioritize Self-Care Without Guilt: Don’t let concerns about others’ opinions stop you from accessing support. If you can afford services like cleaners, babysitters, or grocery delivery, utilize them before burnout sets in. Your well-being is crucial for effective parenting. I also use Percy and the Keep Calm Diffuser as well so I can manage my own regulation if there’s stressful things happening.
2. Embrace Flexibility During Illness: When your child is sick, accept that your work productivity may be impacted. Be proactive:

• Inform meeting attendees that your child might need to join calls
• Be willing to reschedule when necessary. Remember, in the grand scheme, these adjustments won’t affect your career. And if they do, you’re working for the wrong company.

3. Establish Routines for Family Stability: While occasional disruptions are normal, consistent routines benefit everyone. Try:

• Set regular mealtimes
• Maintain a consistent bedtime routine
• Create predictable daily schedules — Humans of all ages thrive on structure, not just children.

4. Optimize Sleep Environment:

• Beach wave sounds have been a favorite with my kids (available on the Sound Asleep Sound Machine from For the Cubs). Experiment with different soothing sounds to find what works best for your child as white noise isn’t always the answer.
• Keeping the bedroom or sleep environment calm and clear of mess can be really helpful too. It can be easier said than done with kid’s rooms often full of “stuff”, but in my experience, has made a really material difference.
• Use different devices that signal “bedtime”. This can be things like lowering the lights throughout the house, lowering your voice and dialing down your own energy, turning off distracting noises that can be happening outside their room, turning on the diffuser and pulling out a special snuggle buddy, like Percy, our weighted bear.

Remember, parenting is a journey of discovery. What works for one family might not work for another, so be open to adapting these tips to your unique situation.

This was very inspiring. Thank you so much for joining us!

C-Suite Moms: Amy Vale Of For the Cubs On How To Successfully Juggle Motherhood and Work was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.