An Interview With Vanessa Ogle
Some kind of support system- whether it’s your family, friends, or colleagues, lean on someone when you need to. It truly does take a village and no one ever got successful all on their own. You’re going to need advice, a moment to breath, a moment to talk to a real adult instead of a toddler for the 10th night in a row. Find a support system and use it.
In this fast-paced world, mothers who juggle work and parenting responsibilities face unique challenges and experiences. Their stories of resilience, strength, and adaptability are not just inspiring but also enlightening. We aim to delve into the lives of working mothers to understand how they manage their professional ambitions while raising their children either single-handedly or with a partner. As part of this series, we had the pleasure of interviewing Chelsea Craig.
Chelsea embarked on her professional journey as a Psychological Operations Specialist in the esteemed United States Armed Forces. Following the start of her family, she gracefully transitioned back into civilian life, embracing challenging Sales and Support Management roles. Throughout her diverse career, Chelsea exhibited unparalleled excellence, garnering a plethora of accolades for her unwavering dedication to the companies she served and the exceptional support she provided to her esteemed clientele.
Over the past decade, Chelsea has thrived in management positions, consistently propelling productivity, efficiency, and revenue to new heights. However, it was during the past five years that Chelsea discovered a profound passion for assisting business owners on their path to successful exits. Having been intimately involved in supporting business owners firsthand, Chelsea bore witness to the resolute strength required to build, nurture, and ultimately transition away from a business. She possesses a comprehensive understanding of the entire process, appreciating the significance of being a trusted confidant to business owners during this pivotal phase.
Chelsea’s educational background encompasses a dual focus on Psychological Operations and Business Management, lending her a unique perspective in her endeavors. When not immersed in her professional endeavors, Chelsea cherishes quality time with her three children in their hometown of Lafayette, Louisiana. She also indulges in her love for reading, camping, and traveling the globe, avidly absorbing the rich tapestry of diverse cultures she encounters along the way.
Thank you so much for joining us in this interview series. Before we dive into our discussion about celebrating working mothers, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you share with us the backstory about what brought you to your specific career path?
To be entirely transparent, my journey into my current career was undeniably influenced by the profound impact my children had on me. Even more so, the unexpected surprise of my 3rd child. I was working non-stop in a grueling role as a District Manager in a different industry and my days were filled with traveling between locations, managing a myriad of issues, and getting home late, often too exhausted to be fully present with my children every night. I’d even have to work most weekends because of unresolved issues and missed out on a lot of valuable time that could have been better spent hanging out with the coolest kids in the world.
At some point, I got so frustrated with being a parent that missed out on so much because of work that I decided I wanted to look for a role that offered more flexibility, maybe even the opportunity to work from home. I was quickly approaching my due date for my 3rd child and knew I wanted to make a change before she arrived. I would be home on maternity leave anyway, so I got to work finding a work-from-home role. After submitting my resume for what seemed like the thousandth time, I finally landed an interview at a business brokerage firm, an industry I admittedly knew little about. However, the resolve to be with your children and reduce stress levels will have you pick up just about anything quickly and easily.
I was fortunate to have had the pleasure of working directly with many business owners in my career, and I come from a family of immigrants who moved to the United States to pursue the American dream. I knew the blood, sweat, and tears required to build and run a business, and I was also acutely aware of the emotional journey every business owner undergoes when contemplating an exit. With the opportunity to work from home full-time, to be an active part of my kid’s lives, and the immense satisfaction I gained from being a small, but supportive, part of a business owner’s journey to exit, I recognized the potential for a fulfilling career and knew I’d found the perfect role.
Can you share a moment or story that happened to you where you were inspired or given hope that there could be successful parenting while building and growing a meaningful career?
Absolutely. So I recently went through one of the hardest years of my life, one that I was honestly unsure how I would ever navigate. I found myself struggling to survive in a toxic and unhealthy marriage- one filled with physical, mental, verbal, and emotional abuse. I knew for my kid’s safety and happiness, as well as my own, I needed to get us out of it- and I did. I was so proud of that, too. But it wasn’t long before I found myself getting laid off from the brokerage firm I had committed 4 solid years to at this point.
I was on the verge of giving up hope when a former colleague from the firm got in touch with me about working at his M&A Advisory firm. He had seen my work ethic and what an incredible impact I had on our prior company and knew without a doubt he wanted to bring me on to his team. I was honored and grateful for the opportunity. In a personal conversation, I shared with him the things I had been going through- trying to recover from the abuse, trying to give my kids a fresh and healthy new start, managing being a single mother for the first time (which was made a little easier by the ability to continue working from home).
One day he said to me, “Would you ever consider moving to Lafayette, Louisiana? Because if so, we will help make that happen.” I didn’t know how to process this. Louisiana was halfway across the country from where we were living in South Carolina at the time. But my kids and I did need a fresh start, especially as we were only a few miles away from the abuse we’d endured. I needed a new environment that allowed me to heal mentally and grow as a woman and mother. How could I say no to this? Well, fear. Fear of being in a new place with no support system, fear of being the only one raising my 3 children, fear of trying to manage a career that was flourishing while not missing out on my kid’s lives, fear of me sacrificing parts of myself or who I wanted to continue growing into professionally because I couldn’t manage both being an incredible mother AND having a meaningful career.
But my company, Final Ascent, ironically a company composed of all males and one female (me) who had no idea what it was like to be in my shoes, washed all that fear down the drain. With reassurances like, “Work from home whenever you need to”, “Work the schedule that makes sense for you and your kids”, “Don’t worry about asking to leave everyday to pick your daughter up from daycare, you don’t even need to ask”, “We know the level of quality your bring to your work no matter what your schedule looks like, do what works for you and your kids”, “Bring your kids to the office if you want, we’ve built a kid’s room just for that”, I couldn’t say no. And from the moment I got here, my company became my support system by trusting in my abilities and allowing me to prioritize my family life alongside my professional one. They mentor me to continue growing in my career and provide me with so many opportunities to propel forward, but simultaneously support me as a single mother doing what she has to do to be there and be present for her kids.
It is exciting to be here with you today celebrating your success. Which three character traits do you think were most instrumental to that success? Can you please share a story or example for each?
Sure. First, at least for my situation, I’d say bravery. Being brave is about being terrified of doing something, but doing it anyway. I don’t want to throw out a ton of cliche quotes here, but you’ll never get anywhere if you let your fears hold you back. Growing as a professional while also being an incredible mother requires you to be brave. Brave enough to tell your employer the struggles you may face, brave enough to work through the judgments you may get for focusing on your career as much as you focus on your children, and brave enough to be an example for your sons and daughters by showing them you won’t give up on your own success.
In line with that, I believe embracing vulnerability is so instrumental to your success as a mother and professional. You have to be vulnerable and honest with your employer about your situation, goals, aspirations, everything, so they can understand how to better support you. You also have to be vulnerable with your kids. Some days I’m exhausted mentally, and while I still put 110% into being present for my kids, I’m open with them about the day I’ve had. I share my bad moments with them or let them know when I’m feeling overwhelmed. Not only does it teach your kids that it’s okay to be honest about your emotions, but it reassures them that your frustrations are not their fault. We all know we can unintentionally let our bad days affect the people around us.
And lastly, resilience. Listen, we already have it pretty tough as working mothers, so I know saying, “Get back up and keep going” definitely feels cliche, but trust me when I say doing this requires it. You’ll have days where you question all of your life choices- get back up and keep going. Days when everyone at work is driving you nuts- get back up and keep going. Days when you’d rather hide in bed than go to another playdate with some toddler’s mother you have to pretend to be excited to interact with- get back up and keep going. There really is no stronger example for our children than us persevering when we feel it’s too much, too bad, too hard. And as a professional, you become more versatile the more resilient you are. If there’s a problem, keep going, you’ll find the answer.
Ok, thank you for that. Let’s now jump to the primary focus of our interview. Can you share a personal story that highlights the balancing act of being a working mother?
There are so many, it’s truly a 24/7 role. I think for me one of the biggest challenges is being so motivated by a project I know I’m going to knock out of the park that I’m inspired to put 100% of myself into it, but then one son has a baseball game, one has basketball practice, and my daughter is due for her annual checkup. I mean, at what point will I find the time to get all of these awesome ideas out or what if I’m so wrapped up in the project I completely forget my toddler’s immunizations, or even simpler, I forget we ran out of milk because my teenager goes through cereal like he’ll never have another chance to eat it ever again (and he doesn’t even drink the milk). It’s these small moments that quickly become larger and more stressful the more they pile on.
I remember when I first moved, I had a project deadline quickly approaching, appointments for all 3 kids to establish a new primary care doctor, my middle son’s first baseball practice, and a houseful of boxes to unpack. I truly didn’t know what to do or how to manage all of it. I wanted to hide in my room from all of life’s requests at the time and hope they would just go away. But here’s where that resilience, vulnerability, and bravery kick in. I had to get these things done, I just had to figure out how to manage my time better and that’s what I did. I let my kids know I was feeling a bit overwhelmed and they hopped in to help where they could- the older two hanging out with my toddler so I could focus on the project I needed to finish up. I took the time to schedule and prioritize but I also learned the difference between important and urgent. And trust me when I say, 6 months later some of those boxes still remain unpacked and I’m 100% okay with it. I’d rather miss the corner shelf knick knacks then miss my son’s first baseball practice, and I can definitely live without a few extra winter clothes to make sure they’re all immunized. Give yourself a break.
What has been your most effective strategy for balancing work commitments with your responsibilities as a parent?
Well I know I just touched on this, but time management and prioritizing everything, but also having boundaries. Making sure you have a grip on what your schedule is, is definitely important, but sticking to it is even more so in my opinion. If you’ve decided your work day ends at 5pm, set the boundary with yourself and your employer that any time after 5pm is dedicated solely to your family life. I promise there is nothing your work requires so urgently that you have to break that boundary. Prioritizing your obligations using the important vs. urgent method, is also incredibly helpful. What tasks do you have that are urgent? Do those first. The others are important, but not so much that you need to break a boundary regarding your commitment to your responsibilities as a parent. And vice versa, prioritize your responsibilities as a parent and set the boundary with yourself that when your schedule is calling for focus on work, you’re doing just that. You never have to split 100% between parenting and work. You can give 100% to both, equally, so long as you’re respecting the clear boundaries between them.
Can you share a significant challenge you faced as a working mother and how you overcame it?
Oh goodness, managing my schedule as a working mother was one of the hardest challenges for me to overcome. I am the type of employee to always give 100%, stay late, go above and beyond. When I moved to Louisiana and started working in the office again, I realized I’m the only one now. I don’t have my mother, the kid’s grandmother, down the street to pick my toddler up from daycare or get my son to practice before I get off because they always schedule these things to start like 15 minutes after you’re off. What would I do? Well, be vulnerable enough to share and brave enough to ask. I told my employer I had to pick my daughter up by 3pm every day and some days had to leave early to get my son to practice. Of course, I’m fortunate to work for such an incredible group, but I still had to be brave enough to request this level of flexibility in my schedule with the commitment that the quality of my work would remain the same.
I think that’s part of it, though. When you are at work, give 100%. Show your employer that you will make sure you’re providing quality work. It makes it easier to ask for levels of flexibility like this. I knew I would also go above and beyond to make sure I was productive and impactful, and I had built a level of trust simply from the quality of my work that made it that much easier for my boss to trust. In fact, his trust in my abilities and commitment to a flexible work schedule, made me more productive and excited about doing quality work for them. I am able to come and go as I please for my children’s activities, work from home whenever I need to, and even bring them into the office if I have to.
Some employers are hesitant to hire moms and especially single mothers. Will you tell us a story about your productivity and accomplishments and how being a mom actually assisted you at work?
First of all, being a mother provides you with so many skills in the workforce it should really be a qualifier for someone applying for a role. Time management, efficiency, project management, people skills, problem solving and so many other skills are built into us as mothers. I’ve had moments in my career where I’ve had to handle disgruntled clients or employees. Have you ever sat through, managed, and came away from a 2-year-old’s tantrum? Because if you have, you can manage any disgruntled person any day.
In all seriousness though, I have received an “Employee of the Year” and the “Innovator of the Year” awards in my more recent professional endeavors and I do believe that a lot of the qualities of motherhood helped me achieve those. I always go above and beyond in all that I do to be a good example for my kids. No mother is perfect and we all know that, but I have always been bound and determined to go above and beyond for my children as well. I always show up for them no matter how tired or frustrated I am and I always try to follow through on my commitments to them as their mom. When you are doing this for the people you love, it’s easy to translate it to the things you are passionate about in your career. And as far as the Innovator Award, when you have 3 children you are destined to run into a multitude of problems. I’ve designed a barrier in my car to stop my two sons from messing with each other on long car rides and have role-played the most ridiculous story lines you can imagine with my now 5 year old. You solve problems and get creative doing it. Again, you do it because you love them so it can be translated to doing it for your passions as well. Give me any problem at work and I promise I will find 3–5 creative ways to solve it.
How do you prioritize self-care amidst your busy schedule?
Oh, it’s non-negotiable. Again, you have to learn to set and maintain boundaries for and with yourself. I am a single mother learning to love herself again for the first time in a very long time. I can’t be 100% for my children or my work if I’m not, first, 100% for me. I am big on scheduling, so I make sure that every evening I have an hour of time scheduled just for me. After getting home from work, doing dinner and homework, getting bathtime knocked out, and spending some time together, my kids know I have an hour of time that’s just for me. Whether I’m reading, taking a bath, doing my nails, the kids know the boundary there and only cross it for emergencies. I explain that everyone needs mental time to themselves to be able to be their very best and my sons are already starting to learn how to set that boundary for themselves when they need that time alone.
I also nerdily take myself on a date once a month and that’s non-negotiable too. I arrange these in advance and plan them on a lunch hour at work while the kids are in school. I was vulnerable in sharing that I needed to do this for myself with my work and they are in full support. I don’t ever miss these and I go all out for myself. Flowers, food, an adventure, the works. Sometimes mother’s can feel forgotten about and some are fortunate enough to have a partner that reminds them of who they really are, but if you don’t, I highly recommend doing this for yourself.
How do you find time and energy for personal development?
Well, I budget for it. If there’s anything this journey has taught me it’s that you have to budget both your time and your energy. What do you want to spend time on? Where do want to put your energy? I make a list of both for both of those questions and then I create a budget for both. Similarly to budgeting my finances, I make note of the things I need to do, including personal development, and I stick to it. If you wouldn’t spend the money you budgeted to pay the light bill, why spend the energy you budgeted to spend on your own development? When you approach life this way, it makes it so much easier to stick to your commitments to work, your family, and yourself.
Based on your experience and research, can you please share “5 Things You Need to Thrive as a Working Mother?”
1 . The ability to forgive yourself- I can’t tell you how many times I have just lost it. Gotten frustrated with my kids, not been able to finish a project in the time I wanted to, forgot to buy that dang milk again. You won’t make it if you constantly spend time on all the things you’ve done wrong. Give yourself a break and some credit, you’re managing so many things all at once and you’re not perfect. We slip and we fail sometimes- get back up, remind yourself how amazing you are for handling all of these things and keep going.
2 . The ability to be honest- I think this is one of the major factors of my success. I stopped worrying about the judgment of others and started leaning more on people’s innate need to support other human beings where they could. If I’m dealing with something, I share it. I’m transparent about what’s going on with me so others at least have a better understanding of where I’m at. Most of the time this leads to a conversation of how we can solve for the situation. I used to never share, put on the facade that I could take on the world on my own and nothing was wrong. Life got so much easier when I started being more honest about what I could and couldn’t handle on my own and what I needed help with.
3 . A guiltless break- seriously take one. When I first started my journey, I never took a break. I was getting maybe 4 hours of sleep max because I had to get this project done or the kid’s stayed up too late and I never got to finish the laundry. I was wearing myself so thin that I literally became physically ill. Your body can only handle so much before it starts telling you you’re pushing it too hard. Take a break. And don’t feel guilty about it, because if you don’t give yourself time to rest and relax, your body will force it on you. You need to be 100% for your kids and your career and the only way you can do that is if you treat yourself and your body kindly and take breaks. There’s nothing wrong with spending a lazy weekend around the house, not cleaning, not running errands, just relaxing. And I promise your kids will be fine just hanging out- rainy movie days on the couch with your kids are the best.
4 . Some kind of support system- whether it’s your family, friends, or colleagues, lean on someone when you need to. It truly does take a village and no one ever got successful all on their own. You’re going to need advice, a moment to breath, a moment to talk to a real adult instead of a toddler for the 10th night in a row. Find a support system and use it.
5 . A bottle of wine- semi-kidding! But find a vice, an escape. For me, there’s nothing more mentally refreshing than a good book with a glass of wine in a bubble bath with a strict rule that this is me time. Along with needing a break, you also have to focus on what makes you happy or you’ll lose it. Sometimes I sit for an hour doing a paint by number, sometimes I do yoga, and sometimes I make the greatest margarita and dance around my house like a crazy woman. But you have to have those moments for yourself.
What support systems or resources have been crucial in helping you manage both parenting and your career?
Honestly, my company and a good friend. I’ve been honest with my company about my situation and proven my quality of work to them enough to have them trust that I will always perform and provide quality work. We now have a relationship where I can lean on them for support in flexibility of my career and my children. And when I need to vent or have that margarita, I call my friend over to do exactly that.
What advice would you give to single mothers striving to achieve success in their careers while raising children?
You are not a bad mother for wanting to pursue your career alongside motherhood. Motherhood does not define you, it’s only one part of you. You can be an incredible mother and an incredible professional. Don’t sacrifice that part of you because others think your kids are your only priority. They can still be your first and not be your only. You can do it.
You are a person of great influence. If you could start a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger. 🙂
I’d like to teach future generations the importance of loving yourself first. My generation and older has been taught that finding love with someone else is what makes you complete and we often end up struggling to feel whole without a relationship or end up in terrible relationships because the idea of being alone scares us. The way you feel about and treat yourself has such a tremendous impact on so many different aspects of your life. Until you learn how to love yourself fully, you can never really reach happiness and you can’t give it to others. Being able to love and care for yourself first empowers you to take on challenges, set boundaries, demand healthy love and respect. I think it’s what’s been missing in the world we’re in today. Everyone is searching for outside validation, when all we need is to realize how incredible and deserving we each are on our own.
How can our readers further follow you online?
So I chose to give up social media a while ago, years now. I know, I know- how do I survive when everything is on social media right now? Trust me, it’s one of the greatest choices I’ve made. I’m allowing more time to focus on myself and not the negativity or expectations of people I don’t even know. It’s a great tool and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t peruse TikTok every so often but I don’t post much online. I am on LinkedIn and fairly active if you want to follow me there, but I’m always open to connecting with people, giving advice, swapping stories, or just to be someone to chat with — just reach out.
Thank you for the time you spent sharing these fantastic insights. We wish you only continued success in your great work!
About The Interviewer: Vanessa Ogle is an entrepreneur, inventor, writer, and singer/songwriter. She is best known as the founder of Enseo which she and her team grew into one of the largest out-of-home media and connected networks in the world, serving more than 100,000,000 people annually. Vanessa’s talent in building world-class leadership teams focused on diversity, a culture of service, and innovation through inclusion resulted in amazing partnerships and customer relationships. She collaborated with the world’s leading technology and content companies such as Netflix, Amazon, HBO, and Dish Networks to bring innovative solutions to the hospitality industry. Enseo has also held an exclusive contract to provide movies to the entire U.S. armed forces for almost 15 years. Vanessa and her team’s relentless innovation resulted in120+ U.S. Patents. Her favorite product is the MadeSafe solution for hotel workers as well as students and children in their K-12 classrooms. Accolades include: #15 on FAST 100, 50 Fastest Growing Women-Owned 2018–2020, Entrepreneur 360 Best Companies 2018–2020, not to mention the Inc. 500 and then another six times on the Inc. 5000. Vanessa was personally honored with Inc. 100 Female Founder’s Award, Ernst and Young’s Entrepreneur of the Year Award, and Enterprising Women of the Year. Vanessa now spends her time enjoying her children, sharing stories to inspire and give hope through articles and speaking engagements. entrepreneurs-to-be with her articles including her LinkedIN newsletter Unplugged. In her spare time she writes music with her husband Paul as the band HigherHill, teaches surfing clinics, and trains dogs.
Please connect with Vanessa here on linkedin and subscribe to her newsletter Unplugged as well as follow her on Substack.
Balancing Acts: Chelsea Craig Of Final Ascent On How To Thrive As A Working Mother was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.