Author and Singer Natalie Farrell On How to Begin, Navigate, & Sustain Sobriety

Author & Singer Natalie Farrell On How to Begin, Navigate, & Sustain Sobriety

An Interview With Wanda Malhotra

Listen — Spend time in nature it is an incredible teacher.

In a world where the journey towards sobriety is often challenging and deeply personal, understanding the pathways and strategies for achieving and maintaining sobriety is crucial. This series aims to provide insight, encouragement, and practical advice for those who are on the road to recovery, as well as for their loved ones and support networks. As a part of this series, I had the distinct pleasure of interviewing Natalie Farrell.

Natalie Farrell is a singer, author and agent with an accomplished 20+ year background in singing, presenting, writing and voice activation. In 2021, she published her first book Light the Way described as “a must-have soul guide to loving life, loving yourself, and committing to the true business of your soul.”

Thank you so much for joining us! Before we dive in, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you tell us a bit about your ‘backstory’?

I am a singer, author, and voice activation specialist. I support people to stop hiding and amplify their greatness I do this through identifying and cutting through the distractions so they can broadcast their work to the most potent channels to make the most impact.

I started singing at the age of 11. At the age of 14, I won a place at The BRIT School of Performing Arts, which led me to study music at The Royal Academy of Music in London and finally to a degree in music at The Royal Northern College of Music in Manchester, England.

For fifteen years, I devoted my time to performing, teaching and travelling. Where I performed in Radio, TV and Theatre as well as private events. I published my first book, Light The Way, in 2021, and in 2022, I recorded and produced Born To Stand Out, my first collection of vocal symphony compositions to accompany people through their amplification process.

Can you share with us the most interesting story from your career? Can you tell us what lessons or ‘takeaways’ you learned from that?

As an entrepreneur, I have many stories! I feel the most interesting to share is also the humblest. Ten years ago, I was asked to lead the singing for a group of amateur musicians. Each week, I found myself leaving the sessions with a feeling of joy in my heart.

This was my first real experience of offering service in the community. It sparked a buzz for connecting people. Inspired from this experience I created a free network for professional musicians, offering a space for connection, support, promotion, and collaboration which is still growing strong!

My takeaways:

1. Working in a community brings unity and humility into your day, life and business.
2. People are scared to show their real identities for fear of being judged and or criticised. However, in a supported community-led environment, they begin to feel safe to come out of their shells. In turn, it helps everyone to believe in their value, and this gives them the confidence to get vulnerable and speak out. Once they feel they are heard, they know that their voice is independent of other’s opinions and worthy to be expressed.
3. It’s easy for harmony to be created in groups of people who get lost in creation.
4. Having a go and making mistakes is better than keeping quiet, keeping yourself hidden or getting stuck in the trait of perfection.

You are a successful individual. Which three character traits do you think were most instrumental to your success? Can you please share a story or example for each?

Vulnerability + Courage — Admit to your defects of character. As part of my first online business, I had a line of yoga wear, and my customers would return time and again as they loved my products and the ethos of the company. However, as a small business owner, I couldn’t compete with the market, and although it saddened me so much, I had to admit it was time to stop producing the products as I couldn’t change the market or try to fix the mass production problems alone. I had to find another way to bring my voice, values and principles to the world.

Curiosity — I love to go off-piste, follow my nose and search for the unexpected in life. I live these experiences fully and uncover my buried or stuffed emotions at the same time. For example, in Costa Rica, on a rope bridge in the Rainforest — my legs turned to jelly I went into fight or flight mode, running from Saber tooth tiger style!

I had to keep walking I had to face this fear of heights and GET REAL and work through it. After experiences like these, I get vocal and share the power of my personal life experiences with my community and followers to offer motivation for others to grow and move forward through life’s ups and downs.

Openness — Singing and communication is a whole-body experience. If you are masking any part of yourself and hiding your whole emotional expression, the audience, on an unconscious level feels the misalignment. They sense something is “off” and can’t fully invest, believe or identify with the performance.

This is the same in real life and business. I attract people to work with me through my openness and honesty, wishing to find more power in their voices and assert their authority and identity in an aligned way.

Are you working on any exciting new projects now? How do you think that might help people?

Yes, I have a couple of exciting projects right now. All the projects help to educate people on how to:

• Stop hiding and admit they can’t do everything alone.
• Break through their false identities, the invisible cords of the past suffocating, their vocal cords.
• Take off their protective armour and show up as their true selves.
• Align with their value and whole worth.
• Amplify their wisdom unapologetically.

1. Amplification is a 7-stage journey through sound and voice which supports entrepreneurs to amplify their message, find their real essence, show up unapologetically in their truth and express themselves without hiding. Challenging them to think about what opportunities would appear if they stopped listening to the critical voice in their head, took leadership and finally freed their wisdom into the world.
2. I am working with a songwriter to produce an album inspired by my poetry, both from Light The Way and my new book which I am currently writing called Get Vocal.
3. I am a speaker at The Raw and Real Legends Summit 3–7th March 2025, which is all about showcasing the human behind the perception. I will be sharing my story as a singer and how I let my survival traits and personal defects from growing up in a dysfunctional home had stopped me from believing the power of my voice.

Ok, thank you for all that. Now let’s shift to the main focus of our interview. How would you advise individuals who are contemplating the journey to sobriety but might be hesitant or unsure about taking the first step?

I am on a journey of emotional sobriety. I woke up on 31st May 2023, and it felt like a new year. A fresh start. I was 42 at the time when a blood test revealed I was hurtling towards menopause. It was a horrible shock — but I had to accept it. I couldn’t change this symptom, but I could act and find ways to help my body to adjust and exude health through change.

I had a passion for wellbeing, but I’d struggled with an eating disorder — restricting certain foods — and, maybe not entirely coincidentally, I’d also had IBS. In search of some sound scientific advice, I discovered Dr Lara Briden’s Hormone Repair Manual and it was something she mentioned that began to influence my future decision-making. — ‘If you can cut down on alcohol or give it up, please do! Alcohol is toxic’ — As soon as I read those words — and particularly the sinister toxic — I thought: ‘Yes! I can do that!’ One and a half years on, I can confirm life just keeps getting better.

As humans, I believe we are hesitant to change:

1. Because it is easier to keep our heads in the sand rather than admit life is unmanageable.
2. Changing habits means we must face the deep shadows and admit to shame, errors and other personality or survival traits that hinder our evolution and personal growth.
3. Fear what our family and friends will say, think, or even judge us when we admit the changes.
4. Committing to a plan, staying focused and not getting distracted is also hard for many people as well as asking for help. My greatest and hardest moments of feeling alive have been when I have reached out and spoken about my feelings. The first time I remember a reach-out call was in my early 20s. I am a child of an alcoholic, and I rang a helpline to talk with someone who would understand what it felt like to be abandoned alone and infected by this disease as a child and adult. When I was met with kindness at the other end of the line my whole body signed with relief it was easier than I thought to share this “secret.”

Are there key considerations or strategies that can make this initial phase more manageable?

You are not alone. My advice to help make this initial phase of abstinence towards clear-headedness and more manageable is to remember the feeling that you don’t want to feel anymore.

Take stock and self-congratulate when you feel good using a walk in nature to distract the mind from indulging in the old, ingrained habit.

Remember why you chose to not numb down your days with toxic, depleting things, such as people, relationships, drink, drugs, sugar, fear, work guilt, and shame.

Sobriety often comes with its unique set of challenges. Can you share insights on how individuals can effectively navigate obstacles or triggers that may arise during their journey? Are there specific tools or support systems that you find particularly helpful in overcoming these challenges?

This is a big subject, as you appreciate, and everyone will have a different story for wanting to live a clear-headed life but probably with aligned motivations such as:

• Burnout.
• Saying enough is enough/can’t take the pain anymore.
• Need to be healthier due to ill health/ health diagnosis/near-death experiences.
• Desire to live a fuller life.
• Fed up with fads and must gain consistency to get better and improve life quality.

Everyone’s story and motivation are different.

My story is rooted in a bloodline of fathers who turned to alcohol to numb their pain and mothers who enabled the behaviour. I am here to rewrite my story and break chains for future generations to come. Sadly, not through my bloodline as I don’t have children. But I can impact change through my work.

This is powerful.

Concerning tools and support. Again, as each person reading this will have a different story, I want to encourage each one of you to journal about what you no longer want, and what repeating patterns are you exasperated with.

The Internet is our friend when it comes to searching for the specific help we need individually. Key in those keywords and help will come be it in the form of podcasts, books, group support, exercise or therapy etc.

Maintaining sobriety is a long-term commitment. From your experience, what are the essential factors that contribute to the sustained success of individuals on this journey? Are there lifestyle adjustments or mindset shifts that prove crucial for the ongoing pursuit of sobriety?

As I mentioned before the biggest step is to get real with yourself and admit that enough is enough. That’s what happened to me. I got off my hierarchical horse popped myself back into my human shoes and asked for help. The other two sustainability factors are talking as this helps to identify any trauma or problems to the surface to be healed, cured, and dealt with. And last but no means least consistency — remembering the reason why you decided to make the change in the first place these all act as anchors to your true self in the turbulent times when temptation, energy leaks, and distractions come your way.

Lifestyle adjustments YES! Mindset shifts YES! Here are my bullet points on the crucial adjustments for the pursuit of toxic-free living.

• I have used resources such as books to learn about my PTSD and trauma responses my favourite is The Body Keeps the Score.
• I admitted to myself I needed more help to recover fully from my obsession with stopping certain foods and nutrients from going into my body, and I joined a weekly talking therapy session.
• I got strong with my boundary setting. I decided certain situations and environments weren’t right for me, and I left these places or friendships.
• I promised myself to meditate daily to raise my focus and awareness of my needs. This isn’t easy for me as I have a default to keeping busy and workaholic tendencies, but I choose to override my character traits such as perfectionism, isolation, hypervigilance, and putting others’ problems above my own (i.e. ignoring my own needs.) These are slowly leaving me know I am digging into self-care and putting my needs above others.

Based on your research or experience, can you please share your “5 Things You Need To Begin, Navigate, & Sustain Sobriety”?

1. Research — Find support through other people’s recovery stories. I attended a sharing group attracted by the change in my sister I decided to join the group she had been attending where people we shared stories of strength and hope with survivors of childhood traumas brought up in alcoholic or dysfunctional homes. What it helped us to understand as children of an alcoholic is that the mistaken belief formed in childhood affects every part of our adult lives and interactions. We fought to survive the destructive effects of alcoholism and began an endless struggle to change the dysfunctional family into a loving, supportive one. We then continued to repeat these patterns in our relationships, work and life. We believed we had failed, unable to see no one could stop the traumatic effects of family alcoholism. In short, we kept repeating the same pattern expecting a different result, but this never happened.
2. Listen — Spend time in nature it is an incredible teacher.
3. Talk — Find support from non-judgmental sources and people who are true empaths and do not trigger you on purpose. Talking has helped me to own up to my trauma recognise I had PTSD and stop sweeping things under the carpet — My sister and I chat together now and share that we learnt that not owning our reality or not speaking your truth is the ultimate act of betrayal to yourself. This led us to deepen our understanding of trauma and PTSD by reading books such as The Body Keeps The Score by Bessel Van Der Kolk which led us to work with IFS Therapy founded by Dr. Richard Schwartz, which is a transformative tool that helps us identify the parts of our minds and how they react to each other. Everybody has these parts this is the nature of the mind. All parts have valuable qualities and resources to help us in our lives.
4. Self-care — Just place your hand under your nose or in front of your mouth — there you will find another great teacher and resource — breathe — keep your hand there and take five breaths. Self-care can be very easy little by little you can build practices that you love and work for you and learn why breathing is important they reset your nervous system, which helps ease stress and relieve anxiety and other symptoms such as IBS.
5. Repeat — consistency is key to building a structure that supports your world. When I turned 40, I had an impulse to start taking my fitness regime more seriously. I began lifting weights as I knew this was good for my bone health and prevention of Osteoporosis as my hormones would change in my 40–50s. The other day 4 years later, a woman in the gym asked me how are you so strong? To which I replied because, at the age of 40, I had an impulse to start taking my fitness regime more seriously. I began lifting weights as I knew this was good for my bone health and prevention of Osteoporosis as my hormones would change in my 40–50s. This is a consistent story I repeat each week wherever I am in the world. When I travel, I have 2 YouTube channels I follow that challenge my body to the same level as when I am in the gym with my trainer. When I spend time in the UK, I train myself. I am strong because I am consistent.

Community support plays a vital role in the journey to sobriety. How can individuals find and engage with supportive communities or resources that align with their specific needs and goals? Are there online platforms, local groups, or initiatives that you recommend for fostering a sense of connection and understanding during this process?

I thank anyone for reading the whole interview. If this resonates with you please do feel free to reach out and connect www.nataliefarrell.co

I also have a podcast series on Spotify Called Light The Way which guides you through an emotional transformation and I have a series of Radio Shows you can also find under Wellbeing Radio Cosmic Soul Sundays available on Spotify

In my local town, I was so thrilled to see a man’s circle led by an incredible leader called Humble Bear

There are official 12-step programmes and helplines available to support all forms of addiction.

I also loved following at the beginning Sober Jo on Instagram here is her website she helps people to reach emotional freedom and uncork their potential and Certified Coach, Specialising in Physical Intelligence and Emotional Freedom

There is so much out there. Once you start talking and opening conversations for change more people and resources will appear.

Good luck to you for choosing to walk on the clearer side of life…

What is the best way for our readers to continue to follow your work online?

You can find me on Instagram @cosmicsongbird_

You can listen to my sound journeys and compositions on all platforms including Spotify, Apple Music and also I have a Bandcamp page which supports musicians very fairly.

For all other resources including learning more about my story, my offerings as well as links to my book and the audio version through my website www.nataliefarrell.co

This was very inspiring. Thank you so much for the time you spent on this. We wish you only continued success.

About the Interviewer: Wanda Malhotra is a wellness entrepreneur, lifestyle journalist, and the CEO of Crunchy Mama Box, a mission-driven platform promoting conscious living. CMB empowers individuals with educational resources and vetted products to help them make informed choices. Passionate about social causes like environmental preservation and animal welfare, Wanda writes about clean beauty, wellness, nutrition, social impact and sustainability, simplifying wellness with curated resources. Join Wanda and the Crunchy Mama Box community in embracing a healthier, more sustainable lifestyle at CrunchyMamaBox.com .

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Author and Singer Natalie Farrell On How to Begin, Navigate, & Sustain Sobriety was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.