An interview with Maria Angelova
Being resolute in making decisions while compassionate in their execution is a critical strategy. Waiting until frustration sets in only leads to confrontations fueled by emotions. Embracing this approach can pave the way for smoother, more effective conversations.
As a leader, some things are just unavoidable. Being faced with hard choices is one of them. Leadership often entails making difficult decisions or hard choices between two apparently good paths. What’s the best way to go about this? Is there a “toolkit” or a skill set to help leaders sort out their feelings and make the best possible decisions? As part of our series about “How Leaders Make Difficult Decisions,” we had the pleasure of interviewing Keita Demming.
Keita Demming is an award-winning educator and coach with a PhD in Adult Education and Workplace Learning who works to transform companies into places that are idea-driven and people-centred. At The Covenant Group, he designs training programs and coaches clients to meet their strategic goals and build their businesses. He is passionate about fostering community, and one of his proudest personal achievements is the community he helped grow around TEDxPortofSpain, one of the most successful TEDx events in the world.
Thank you so much for your time! I know that you are a very busy person. Our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you tell us a bit about your ‘backstory’ and how you got started?
I believe everyone needs a mentor. When I was doing my PhD, a friend at the time introduced me to my mentor Norm Trainor who had been doing the work we do for more than four decades. He asked me if I had ever considered applying my line of work to the world of business. We started working together and today I am his succession plan. I still have a lot to learn but the more you know, the more you learn that you know so little.
None of us are able to achieve success without some help along the way. Is there a particular person who you are grateful for who helped get you to where you are? Can you share a story?
My mentor, colleague and friend Norm Trainor. My new book, Strategy to Action, is a combination of my skills as a researcher and his experience as a practitioner. There is a great metaphor called Yoking, it is when you pair an old ox and a young ox to plough the soil and you get the ideal conditions for fertile ground. This is what has happened with Norm and myself. The book is a framework I developed after researching how our clients work and what they do best.
Thank you for all that. Let’s now turn to the main focus of our discussion. Can you share with our readers a story from your own experience about how you lead your team during uncertain or difficult times?
COVID-19 is perhaps the most obvious. When you are in difficult times, that is when you are most likely to make poor decisions. It is during times of stress that you revisit your vision and mission to get crystal clear on who you are serving. We tend to make simple guidelines for people to follow. For example, during the pandemic, we asked our clients to focus on three guidelines:
- Never let a crisis go to waste.
- Focus on the idea that we have been given the gift of time.
- Move from the outside in, focus on those you serve.
In Strategy to Action, I tell the story of Chad who had an amazing startup but his team was struggling. He viewed his team as a family and it was not until I asked him, “What would be different if you thought of them as a team?” that he realized that he needed a different team. The metaphor of family was holding him back. The way he was looking at the problem was holding him back and he needed to reframe how he was thinking about the problem.
Did you ever consider giving up? Where did you get the motivation to continue through challenges? What sustains your drive?
In difficult times most people do consider giving up. I have a client who prior to COVID was on the edge of rapid growth in his company. His pipeline was strong, his profit margins were increasing, and he was onboarding new clients faster than he could manage. He was in the health space and when COVID hit it crumbled his business. After COVID, he thought about rebuilding the business but he knew his heart was not in it. Knowing when to quit is hard. Most people who are trying to achieve big things think of quitting, and to decrease the chances of quitting we need to return to why we are doing what we set out to do: our mission. When you have a very clear mission and structure your life so you are working at the highest level of your capability you increase the chances of sustaining your drive.
Leadership often entails making difficult decisions or hard choices between two apparently good paths. Can you share a story with us about a hard decision or choice you had to make as a leader?
Leadership is all about decision-making. I see too many people make decisions devoid of a strategic framework. The client I just talked about had to make the hard decision to let go of many of the people on his founding team. He knew where he wanted to go and he realized he had the wrong people on the bus. One of those people was one of his best friends, and the brutal truth was that his friend was not the right person to help him through that journey. He was very generous with his exit packages and again he followed a very simple guideline: be merciless in your decision making, be merciful in your execution. In other words, make the tough decisions quickly and with rigour and execute them kindly and ethically.
What process or toolset can a leader use to make a choice between two difficult paths?
Another way to think about strategy is as scenario planning. We use the Strategy Quadrant as our decision-making framework. When you have a strategy, it generally means that you have a framework for making decisions. When faced with two difficult decisions, you want to extend the shadow of the decision further. You want to consider how each decision will impact you over the short, medium and long term. We usually use a 10–10–10 framework. How will this decision play out in ten days, ten months and ten years? I once had a client who was very happy with his decision when we talked about ten days and ten months. In essence, he was okay with his decision in the short term. Once we began to talk about ten years, it changed everything for him. Often, people are wary of a decision in the short term, but in the long term, they know it will work out in their favour. So lean into the idea of extending the shadow of your decisions.
Do you have a mentor or someone you can turn to for support and advice? How does this help? When can a mentor be helpful? When is this not helpful?
I do. I believe everyone needs a mentor, but more importantly, I think we all need a community of support. We all need a tribe of people who are willing to support and challenge us with the decisions we make. In my world, I have learned to curate the people closest to me as a way of recruiting them to be part of your tribe. Mentors are great and a community is much better.
What would you say is the most critical role of a leader when faced with a difficult decision?
Most leaders struggle with what I refer to as bringing their team along. What happens is a leader might spend time thinking about and solving a problem in their head. While the rest of their team is off living their lives, the leaders have made leaps in their thinking. They come in on Monday morning and continue the conversation from where they are in their thinking and forget to update the rest of the team. It is so important to focus on bringing your team along the journey with you.
Do you ever look back at your decisions and wish you had done things differently? How can a leader remain positive and motivated despite past mistakes?
Looking back on decisions for purposes other than learning is not a good use of time. You want to focus on where you have made progress. Where you have made mistakes you want to focus on what you can learn and what systems you need to put in place to reduce the chances of repeating past mistakes.
What is the best way to boost morale when the future seems uncertain? What can a leader do to inspire, motivate and engage their team during uncertain times?
Most people think we can motivate people with pep talks and stories, when people are motivated by purpose. Simply put, you need to put purpose back into your work. In times of uncertainty, it’s easy to fall prey to the “Illusion of Certainty,” assuming that stability will prevail. However, as Nassim Nicholas Taleb’s Turkey Illusion vividly illustrates, unforeseen events can shatter this illusion. To thrive in uncertain times, we must return to our “why”–our core purpose. Here are five key takeaways to guide you through uncharted waters:
1. Embrace the inherent uncertainty: accept that uncertainty is not a temporary state but a fundamental aspect of life. Treat your strategy as a flexible hypothesis, ready to adapt as circumstances evolve. Avoid the trap of clinging to false assurances.
2. Let your “why” be your compass: when maps fail, your “why” becomes your compass. Reconnect with your purpose and remind your team of the mission and vision. Create a space where creativity and intelligence flourish, focused on solving the problem at hand.
3. Strategy is a continuous process: rather than a rigid plan, view your strategy as an ongoing process. Consistently revisit objectives and adjust course as new information arises. Turn your strategy into a dynamic planning framework.
4. Play to win: under uncertainty, playing it safe is a tempting refuge. However, true commitment is essential. Whether in sports or business, half-hearted efforts are more likely to lead to setbacks. Take calculated risks and play to win.
5. Overcome inner obstacles: in uncertain times, self-awareness is paramount. Distinguish between reasons and excuses, and confront the inner barriers holding you back. This inner work, often overlooked but crucial, is the linchpin of high performance.
In conclusion, thriving in uncertainty begins with inner reflection and a renewed sense of purpose. Embrace the ever-present uncertainty, let your ‘why’ guide you, and view strategy as a dynamic process. Play boldly and confront your inner obstacles. These strategies will not only weather the storm of uncertainty but empower you to excel in it. Remember, it’s the “soft stuff” that ultimately makes the difference in your performance.
Can you share 3 or 4 of the most common mistakes you have seen other businesses or leaders make when faced with a hard decision? What should one keep in mind to avoid that?
Mistake #1: They do not take the time to understand the problem they are facing. The Importance of Problem Understanding: A Lesson from Space Exploration
In the quest for solutions, it’s crucial to first deeply grasp the essence of the problem at hand. There is the story of the Americans and Russians trying to find a way to write in space. The Americans invested in a zero gravity pen and the Russians used a pencil. The choice between a pen and a pencil for space exploration exemplifies this principle, emphasizing the significance of assessing the nature of the challenge before rushing into a solution.
Mistake #2: Let their emails influence their decisions. Emotions in Strategy and Planning: Navigating the Decision-Making Maze
Between formulating a strategy and executing a plan lies a landscape of emotions. Choices, delays, and tough conversations often emerge as key emotional hurdles. Understanding and addressing these emotional dynamics is essential for effective decision-making.
Mistake #3: They wait too long. The Price of Delay: Confronting Difficult Choices in Decision-Making
Postponing decisions may seem comfortable in the short term, but it can lead to more significant challenges down the line. Delays often stem from the reluctance to make tough choices or engage in uncomfortable conversations. Recognizing and confronting this tendency is crucial for moving forward.
Based on your experience and success, what are the five most important things a leader should do when making difficult decisions?
Mindset #1: The type of problem you are facing is the most important
Most people assume their problem is simple and as a result they end up with unintended consequences. A good example is known as the Cobra Effect. The Cobra Effect is a phenomenon where a well-intentioned intervention worsens a situation. It originated from a story in colonial India: to reduce cobra population, a bounty was offered. Instead, people started breeding cobras for profit. When the program ended, the now-worthless snakes were released, exacerbating the issue. We need to be very aware of when we are facing a complex problem versus a simple problem.
Mindset #2: Play the long Game
When you play the long game, you win. “It’s all about the long term” was the title of Jeff Bezos’ first letter to shareholders. Speaking to Wired Magazine in 2011, he explained, “If everything you do needs to work on a three-year time horizon, then you’re competing against a lot of people. If you’re willing to invest on a seven-year time horizon, you’re now competing against a fraction of those people because very few companies are willing to do that. By lengthening the time horizon, you can engage in endeavors you could never otherwise pursue. At Amazon, we like things to work in five to seven years. We’re willing to plant seeds. Let them grow.”
Mindset #3: Mercy in Execution, Boldness in Decision: Unraveling the Decision-Making Dilemma.
Being resolute in making decisions while compassionate in their execution is a critical strategy. Waiting until frustration sets in only leads to confrontations fueled by emotions. Embracing this approach can pave the way for smoother, more effective conversations.
Consider those two prompts:
How can you be merciless in the decision, and merciful in the execution?
What’s already true and you are unwilling to accept it?
Mindset #4: Confront Uncomfortable Truths: A Pathway to Effective Decision-Making
Acknowledging the truths we are hesitant to accept is a pivotal step towards progress. Often, we delay decisions because we’re not yet ready to face these uncomfortable realities. Embracing this introspective exercise can lead to more timely and informed choices.
Mindset #5: Align your short term activities with your long term goals
Most entrepreneurs are caught in a tension of “how do I survive?” which usually means fund the short term, while I build the long-term. They often set out to build the long-term and decide this activity is going to help me get to my long-term goal. What happens is that activity ultimately distracts them and they either never get to the long-term or are very delayed in getting to it. When you make a decision to do something for the expressed purpose of helping you get to the long-term, have an exit plan. Know when, why, and how you are going to say no. Align your short-term activities with your long-term goals and objectives.
Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote”? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your life?
“The future drives the present.” We all need to raise the level of our gaze. It is how we differentiate ourselves because more people are trapped by things that are personal, immediate and certain. The things that redefine your life are those things that are organized, deferred and a gamble.
How can our readers further follow your work?
Visit keitademming.com and follow me on social with @kdemming
Thank you so much for sharing these important insights. We wish you continued success and good health!
Keita Demming Of The Covenant Group On How Leaders Make Difficult Decisions was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.