An interview with Dr. Bharat Sangani
Increase your self-awareness by engaging in a reflective process. Self-awareness is the foundation for any meaningful shift. You can’t move forward with intention unless you first understand your starting point and where you want to go. Start by engaging in reflective practices, like using a life wheel exercise to assess your satisfaction and fulfillment across different areas of life. Journaling is another powerful tool.
Finding and living in alignment with your true purpose can be a transformative journey. Yet, many struggle with identifying their life’s purpose and aligning their goals with it. In this series, we aim to explore how individuals discover their purpose and create a life that reflects their authentic selves, leading to greater fulfillment and success. As a part of this series, we had the pleasure of interviewing Arivee Vargas.
Arivee Vargas is an award-winning executive coach and author of Your Time to Rise: Unlearn Limiting Beliefs, Unlock Your Power, and Unleash Your Truest Self. With nearly 20 years of legal and corporate executive experience, she coaches high-achieving women, particularly women of color and first generation women, to feel less overwhelmed and stuck, and to experience greater clarity, joy, fulfillment, and life satisfaction. Arivee is a sought-after speaker and thought leader on topics of women empowerment, self-care and wellbeing, how to prevent burnout, work-life harmony, career development and navigating the intersection of multiple identities as a first-generation Latina, mother, leader and lawyer. She is a proud Boston College alumna.
Thank you so much for your time! I know that you are a very busy person. Our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you tell us a bit about your ‘backstory’ and how you got started?
I began my career as an attorney, dedicating over a decade to the legal field, but despite achieving professional success, I couldn’t shake the feeling that something was missing. I felt disconnected from my purpose, and unsure if I was on the path that truly aligned with who I was. Taking a step back, I allowed myself the space to reflect deeply on what mattered most to me and how I wanted to show up in my career, my family, and my life. This process led me to pivot into people and organizational development, where I was able to lean into my passion of empowering others to grow and thrive. That transition eventually brought me to pursue my true calling as an executive coach, helping high-achieving women, particularly women of color, break through the barriers of limiting beliefs to embrace their full potential and be intentional about how they live and work. My own journey of navigating significant career transitions, motherhood, and the complexities of navigating my cultural identity as a first-generation Latina taught me invaluable lessons about resilience and redefining success. Today, I’m committed to supporting others as they take ownership of their stories, create lives aligned with their values, and rise in both their personal and professional lives with confidence and authenticity.
None of us can achieve success without some help along the way. Is there a particular person that you are grateful for, who helped get you to where you are? Can you share a story?
Many people have played a pivotal role in my journey, and I’ve been fortunate to know many of them throughout my entire career. From former law firm partners and judges I had the privilege of working closely with, to senior leaders who believed in me and offered opportunities that pushed me to grow, their support has been invaluable. Beyond my professional network, I’m deeply grateful for the encouragement of my family and close friends, especially my sister. They’ve been my rock, always there to lift me up during moments of doubt or fear, reminding me of my purpose and strength. Above all, my parents have had the most profound impact on my life. Their sacrifices and hard work paved the way for me to attend top universities, setting the foundation for my entire career. To this day, they continue to inspire me with their resilience and love.
You are a successful leader. Which three character traits do you think were most instrumental to your success? Can you please share a story or example for each?
The three character traits that have been most instrumental to my success are my growth mindset, adaptability, and ability to cultivate strong relationships.
- Growth Mindset: I’m constantly seeking opportunities to learn and grow. I thrive on new challenges and enjoy diving deeply into different areas to develop new skills. The various pivots in my career, from practicing law to roles in compliance, HR, and coaching, required me to embrace growth at every stage. I trusted my ability to figure things out, reminding myself that if I didn’t know something, it was only a matter of time before I would. I’ve always believed that no matter how much we know, there’s always room to stay curious, explore further, and expand our understanding. Learning is a lifelong journey.
- Adaptability: I’ve always been committed to my goals but recognize the importance of adjusting plans when needed. In corporate and legal environments, unexpected priorities or shifts are inevitable, and I’ve learned to adapt my approach quickly to address them. Being open to feedback has also been key to my growth. I seek input regularly, view it as an opportunity to improve, and take actionable steps to implement suggestions. Staying flexible has allowed me to navigate change with focus and intention.
- Relationships: Building strong relationships has been foundational to my success. Collaboration and diverse perspectives lead to the best results, yet too many people assume or are told they can succeed by working in isolation. Early in my career, I was told to “keep my head down and just get the work done,” but I’ve found that lifting my head to connect with others, ask questions, and offer support creates lasting value. Relationships are critical for navigating organizational dynamics like hierarchy and politics, and they also form the foundation of your professional network over time. Networking is ultimately about maintaining genuine, reciprocal relationships, and it’s one of the most important investments you can make in your career.
Ok, fantastic. Let’s now turn to the crux of our interview. Was there a defining moment or experience in your life when you felt a clear sense of your purpose? How did it influence the goals you set from that point forward?
Since childhood, I’ve always felt a deep desire to serve and empower others, creating meaningful impact along the way. However, it wasn’t until my 30s that I began to understand the unique ways I could make that impact. Becoming a mother at 32 was one of the most challenging and transformative experiences of my life. It completely shifted my perspective on who I was and what truly mattered, especially after years of tying my self-worth to my achievements and my identity as a lawyer at a prominent law firm.
What began as an identity crisis evolved into an identity rebirth. I started anchoring myself in my own truths and desires rather than conforming to societal expectations of who someone “like me” — a Latina, mother, lawyer — should be. This awakening led me into the personal development space, where I worked with a life coach and ultimately became a certified executive coach myself.
As a coach, I focused on guiding high-achieving professionals through pivotal personal and professional transitions. My work primarily centered on helping women lawyers and corporate leaders navigate moments of uncertainty with clarity, conviction, and courage. At one point, I was balancing multiple coaching clients, a demanding full-time role at a mission-driven, fast-paced company, and a growing speaking career. I delivered keynotes and spoke at organizations on topics such as professional and leadership development, women’s empowerment, self-care, and work-life harmony. (I prefer the term “harmony” over “balance” because I don’t believe in perfect balance — it’s about rearranging the parts of your life each day to create harmony over the long term.)
Over time, it became clear that while certain aspects of being a lawyer were fulfilling, my true calling was to make a deeper, more transformative impact. Coaching, speaking, and writing became the vehicles through which I could serve others in a more meaningful way. I feel most alive when I’m helping others anchor themselves in their authentic truths — free from societal expectations or conditioned beliefs — while increasing their self-awareness, shifting their mindset, and taking bold action toward becoming who they truly want to be and achieving what they deeply desire.
This passion has culminated in my book,Your Time to Rise: Unlearn Limiting Beliefs, Unlock Your Power, and Unleash Your Truest Self, which will be released on January 14, 2025. The book is a guide for those feeling lost, stuck, or uncertain about their path, helping them find clarity, courage, fulfillment, and joy.
My purpose, at its core, is to help others transform their lives from the inside out. I am here to empower people to live the life they truly want — not the one others expect of them — and to rise into who they most want to become.
What practical steps can someone take to begin uncovering their life’s purpose if they feel lost or unsure about their direction?
The first step is to pause. If your life were a movie, this would be the moment to press pause. I understand how difficult it can be to step off the hamster wheel of daily life. You may feel like there’s always so much to do — one task gets checked off only to be replaced by the next. There’s often a sense of falling behind, with a never-ending to-do list playing on repeat in your mind.
That’s why it’s crucial to be intentional and create space for yourself to pause and reflect. This allows you to look at your life holistically and with fresh perspective. Take a bird’s-eye view and honestly assess:
- How satisfied are you with the different areas of your life?
- What brings you joy and energizes you?
- What truly matters most to you?
- Where do you derive meaning and fulfillment?
I believe everyone has a purpose: to live a life that feels true to who you are and makes you feel fully alive, rather than merely existing. If you feel overwhelmed by the question, “What’s my life’s purpose?” try reframing it. Instead, ask yourself, “What gives me a sense of purpose?” and approach it with curiosity.
Remember, purpose isn’t something you “find.” It’s something you uncover. It’s not out there waiting to be discovered; it’s already within you, waiting to be tapped into.
How do you differentiate between external pressures — like societal expectations — and the inner calling that aligns with your true self?
This strikes at the core of a question so many grapple with: What do I really want? (versus What is expected of me?). It’s not always easy to untangle your true desires from what you’ve been conditioned to want. The lines blur because, for much of our early lives, we’re rewarded and validated for doing what others tell us is right.
This cycle of external validation — being praised for working hard, climbing the ladder, and achieving traditional success — can make it easy to lose sight of what truly matters to you. You get on the validation hamster wheel, chasing goals without pausing to ask, Is this what I actually want? The truth is, many of us are socially conditioned to pursue things like career advancement, financial success, and external achievement because they’re associated with societal approval. But when we reach those milestones, the fulfillment we expect often isn’t there. Instead, we feel a sense of emptiness because these pursuits weren’t rooted in what brings us purpose and meaning.
The pressure to prove, perform, and perfect only intensifies when you start to sense your inner calling — the path that makes you feel alive and true to yourself. That’s where resistance arises because following this path requires breaking free from ingrained beliefs and societal conditioning.
For anyone struggling to differentiate external pressures from their inner calling, I recommend two exercises:
Adopt a Future Self Perspective:
Imagine yourself 20 years into the future. Look back on your life and ask:
- What will matter most to me then?
- What will I be most proud of?
- Am I pursuing what aligns with that vision, or am I chasing societal and familial approval?
This long-term perspective can help clarify whether your current pursuits are congruent with your inner values or merely shaped by external expectations.
Examine the Source of Your Motivations:
When doubts arise — when you hear a voice saying you’re being foolish, unrealistic, or need to “be practical” — pause and ask yourself:
- Whose voice is this?
- When was the first time I heard it?
- Is this belief truly mine, or is it something I’ve inherited or absorbed from others?
By identifying and questioning the source of these messages, you can better distinguish between external conditioning and your authentic desires.
Ultimately, differentiating between external pressures and your inner calling takes courage — the courage to question deeply ingrained beliefs, challenge the status quo, and, most importantly, trust yourself. It’s about learning to tune into your own voice and summoning the bravery to follow a path that might be misunderstood or judged by others. This journey isn’t easy, but it’s the only way to create a life aligned with your true self.
Can you share an example of a time when you adjusted or abandoned a goal because it no longer aligned with your deeper sense of purpose? What did you learn from that experience?
If you had asked me at the start of my career what I aspired to, I would have said I wanted to become a partner at a law firm, a general counsel at a company, or perhaps even a federal judge. These goals reflected what I thought success looked like at the time. But 15 years after graduating from law school, I came to a profound realization: the practice of law wasn’t going to fulfill my deeper desire to create a meaningful impact on people’s lives by helping them grow and develop into the truest version of themselves.
This realization led me to pivot from law into human resources at a fast-paced biotech company. I vividly remember the Chief Legal Officer asking me, “This means you won’t be a lawyer anymore. Are you okay with that?” Without hesitation, I answered a resounding yes. I knew that the chapter of being a lawyer had closed, and I was ready to embrace the next phase of my journey. That clarity gave me the confidence to move forward, despite stepping into unfamiliar territory.
Years later, I faced a similar moment of reckoning when I decided to leave the corporate world entirely to focus full-time on my coaching and speaking business. Once again, I felt that same clarity in my bones, but this time, I had to summon the courage to walk away from the golden handcuffs of financial stability and take a leap of faith. While I had fears and doubts, my calling to help others transform their lives and find more fulfillment, alignment, and joy was far stronger than my worries.
This experience taught me the power of clarity in navigating life’s transitions. When you are deeply aligned with your purpose and values, it becomes easier to find the confidence and courage to pursue what’s next, even when the path is uncertain. I also learned that letting go of a goal that no longer serves you isn’t a failure — it’s an act of growth and alignment with who you’re becoming.
What advice would you give to people trying to pursue their purpose while managing the demands of day-to-day life, such as work, family, and other responsibilities?
We make time for the people and things that matter most to us. This is where ruthless prioritization becomes essential. With so many demands on your time and energy, it’s crucial to get clear on what is most important in this particular season of your life. Once you identify your priorities, take intentional action that aligns with them.
Not everything that demands your attention deserves it equally. It’s important to evaluate where your time is going and adjust accordingly. What truly serves your purpose and moves you closer to the life you want? Let go of the pressure to respond to every demand or meet every expectation.
Equally important is understanding that someone else’s blueprint won’t work for you. Everyone has their own unique circumstances, beliefs, resources, and challenges. Your path needs to be designed around what you most value and who you aspire to become. By staying true to your priorities and crafting a way forward that works for you, you can balance day-to-day demands while still pursuing a life of purpose and alignment.
What are “5 Ways to Align Your Goals With Your True Self”?
Increase your self-awareness by engaging in a reflective process. Self-awareness is the foundation for any meaningful shift. You can’t move forward with intention unless you first understand your starting point and where you want to go. Start by engaging in reflective practices, like using a life wheel exercise to assess your satisfaction and fulfillment across different areas of life. Journaling is another powerful tool.
Use prompts such as:
- What’s working well in my life?
- What’s not working well?
- What drains me?
- What energizes me?
- What do I need to do differently?
These exercises allow you to articulate your inner dialogue and uncover what’s most pressing or unclear for you. Also, consider speaking with a trusted, non-judgmental person like an executive coach or a therapist who can act as a mirror and hold space for you to better understand your current state.
Identify and understand your core values. Core values are the principles that define what matters most to you. When your goals align with your values, they feel more intentional and fulfilling. Conversely, when your goals conflict with your values, you may feel unmotivated or empty, even after achieving them.
To align your goals, first get clear on your top three to five core values. Then, examine your current goals and ask yourself:
- Do my goals reflect how I want to spend my time and energy?
- Am I pursuing them because I truly want to, or because of past expectations or habits?
- Am I aiming for this goal because I want to, or because I feel a sense of obligation?
- To what extent are my goals congruent with my values? How can I ensure they’re more aligned?
Activate and follow your inner compass, instead of chasing the approval of others. We’ve all been socially conditioned and programmed to want to achieve certain goals. It’s easy to chase goals based on societal, familial, cultural or professional pressures and expectations. Aligning with your true self requires focusing on your inner compass — your core values, purpose, strengths, and inner knowing — to determine what is right for you. Goals shaped by external expectations and the pursuit of external approval (especially family and peers) feel like inauthentic obligations. They don’t lead to fulfillment, because you don’t truly believe in the reasons you are pursuing them. Your accomplishments can in turn ring hollow and feel empty. When you allow your inner compass to guide your decisions and the goals you pursue, you’re building a life that is uniquely yours — one that energizes you and makes you feel alive, rather than living in accordance with others’ version of success. You stop simply existing and start really living.
To reflect further on this, ask yourself: Are you pursuing certain avenues or maintaining the status quo because you’re tethering your sense of self-worth, happiness and fulfillment to external expectations, validation, or approval? Does this goal feel authentic to me, or does it feel like I’m trying to prove something to others or to my past self? If I woke up tomorrow in a world where no one would judge me, including those I work with and those closest to me, what goals would I choose to pursue and why? What are my goals rooted in — love, joy and fulfillment or fear, insecurity and worry?
Exercise your self-agency to create an environment supportive of your goals. Your environment plays a critical role in staying true to your values and goals. Surround yourself with people and spaces that energize, encourage, and inspire you. Seek out those who challenge the status quo and embrace growth. You will be more inclined to consider possibilities rather than succumb to your perceived limitations when you are in rooms like that. Conversely, distance yourself from environments that prioritize complacency or conformity over authenticity.
Ask yourself:
- What type of support do I need to stay aligned with my goals?
- Who can I lean on, and what resources can I access?
- What can I do to cultivate an environment that nurtures my goals?
Adopt Your Future Self’s Perspective. Imagine the person you most want to become and use that vision to shape your goals today. This practice helps you focus on long-term fulfillment rather than short-term distractions or external pressures.
Here’s one way to do this: Close your eyes and picture yourself 20 years from now. Imagine every detail of your day — your environment, relationships, habits, and emotional, physical, and mental state. Then, ask your future self:
- What do I value most at this point in my life?
- What do I need to prioritize now?
- What expectations or beliefs do I need to release?
- What regrets do I want to avoid?
How can our readers further follow your work?
Readers can connect with my work in several ways:
Follow Me & Tune into my Podcast
Stay inspired by following me on LinkedIn (www.linkedin.com/in/ariveevargas) and Instagram (www.instagram.com/ariveevargas)
Subscribe to my YouTube channel (@AriveeVargas) for practical strategies and insights.
Tune into The Humble Rising Podcast (www.ariveevargas.com/podcast), where I share empowering conversations and tools to navigate life’s transitions and align with your purpose.
Join My Email Community:
Visit my website at www.ariveevargas.com to join my email community. Each week, I share actionable strategies, tools, and insights for living with more alignment and fulfillment. You’ll also gain access to exclusive opportunities to work with me in my mastermind or one-to-one coaching.
Pre-Order My Book:
My book, Your Time to Rise: Unlearn Limiting Beliefs, Unlock Your Power, and Unleash Your Truest Self (www.ariveevargas.com/book), is designed to help you navigate personal and professional inflection points with clarity, courage, and conviction. It’s packed with actionable insights to help you create a life of purpose, joy, and alignment. Your Time to Rise releases on January 14, 2025, and you can pre-order your copy now to be among the first to read it!
Learn more about my coaching programs at www.ariveevargas.com.
Thank you so much for sharing these important insights. We wish you continued success and good health!
About The Interviewer: Dr. Bharat Sangani is a cardiologist and entrepreneur with over 35 years of experience, practicing in Gulfport, Mississippi, and Dallas, Texas. Board-certified in Internal Medicine and Cardiology, he specializes in diagnosing, treating, and preventing cardiovascular diseases, including heart disease and hypertension. In 1999, Dr. Sangani founded Encore Enterprises, a national real estate investment firm. Under his leadership, the company has executed transactions exceeding $2 billion, with a portfolio spanning residential, retail, hotel, and office developments. Known for his emphasis on integrity and fairness, Dr. Sangani has built Encore into a major player in the commercial real estate sector. Blending his medical and business expertise, Dr. Sangani created the Life is a Business mentorship program. The initiative offers guidance on achieving balance in health, wealth, and relationships, helping participants align personal and professional goals. Now based in Dallas, Texas, Dr. Sangani continues to practice cardiology while leading Encore Enterprises and mentoring others. His career reflects a unique blend of medical expertise, entrepreneurial spirit, and dedication to helping others thrive.
Discovering Your Life’s Purpose: Arivee Vargas On How to Align Your Goals with Your True Self was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.